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I work with my mom in a cafeteria and a guy that comes through the line every morning asked my mom about me (if I was single and what not). So he gives me his number and I don't call him because I am to shy, so my mom gives him my number. He calls me while I was out to supper with my mom and my aunt(who I also work with). I ended up inviting him out to horseshoes Monday night with a lot of my family there. He got along great with my family and then he asked me what I was doing next friday or saturday. I said I was going camping with my family, and he could stop by if he wanted to. So my Aunt came and sat by us and she was like "So are you coming camping with us this weekend". And he said yes. And so the problem is, is that I just found out today (by a coworker, not by him) that he has a 4yr old little boy. And he is going to be at the campground this coming week-end.
What should I say, if anything?
He is 28, I am 19. And I have never really been in a serious relationship. And I am a virgin. I am freaking out because I don't know what to do. My mom is mad at me because she says if you like him, you like him... having a kid shouldn't matter.
I don't know how to take this information. Any advice would be great! Thanks
I understand age cap is big, but relationships can work out..
Just a 28 year old with a child looking at a 19 year old?
Why not a 25 year old?
Im 21 and I wouldnt go for a 28 yr. old man (if I were single)...so I cant understand why he's interested in her and why she's entertaining the thought of him being a partner (to each it's own I guess!)...
I definitely think this man is going to try to manipulate her.
The age gap and life experiences are much too broad in this situation IMO
What is seriously wrong with this picture. I could find a few problems. The mom is off for one, the whole family hangs out together, but no one has a problem with this 19 year old drinking. Then she brings a man I mean GROWN man with on a family camping trip...over nights? The mom is okay with it. The mom has no problem with this 28 year old with the 4 yearold looking at her 19 year old. This is all so sketchy... yuck
Im 21 and I wouldnt go for a 28 yr. old man (if I were single)...so I cant understand why he's interested in her and why she's entertaining the thought of him being a partner (to each it's own I guess!)...
I definitely think this man is going to try to manipulate her.
The age gap and life experiences are much too broad in this situation IMO
You meant 'WE' can't understand why he is interested in her.
Ok, so I feel like me and my family is being put down here.. So I am 19 and drink on occasions.. You can't tell me none of you guys drank at 19? And the way my mom sees it, is that she would rather me being with her and drinking, other than me being some where else. And a lot of my family have dated either younger or older. Its not like I go get drunk and drive or make dumb decisions. Obviously you read that part, right? I didn't kiss him, I didn't have sex with him.. what did i do wrong? So I let him hold my hand.. MY HAND people! Not my butt, not my leg.. my hand! I didn't come here to get hated on for drinking under age or to hear what a bad mother I have...
I actually disagree with this. I like to remember this if you lose yourself around a guy lose him. If you need to change so somebody will like you then the change that needs to be made is that other person. It sounds to me that he likes you and you like him. The confusion is natural. I find that if i overthink a guy to much i get confused and find to many flaws. I can understand why he would ask to to stay in his tent. CLoseness. I'm a girl that likes to cuddle. And I like guys that like to cuddle as well. I'm not saying for 100% that he wasn't thinking about sex but some guys just like to have the girl close to him. To hold her and smell the scent of her hair. My advice let him take you out and go with the flow. On the first few dates he's going to be on his best behavior. So if you see any red flags then you know that its time to leave. But little minor flaws could turn out be the things you like most about him
Thank you for your answer! I feel like you understand the situation more..
The whole holding the hand thing isn't the issue, it's that he took you by the hand back up to go pick up your liter, like you are a child. oops you kinda are compared to him. My problem with the drinking isn't how often, it's that your mother seems to be the supplier, NOT AT ALL OKAY.
and I will elaborate more to my comment above as to why I disagree. I don't think that this girl is mature enough to handle what is required of you to take care of a four year old boy. That requires being mature enough to make good decisions and be a role model. She has a lot of living left to do and it is best that this girl who is on this particular site asking for what she should do, should perhaps take some time to figure it out on her own. She in my opinion isn't displaying very good choices, drinking at 19 w/ your mom isn't smething that everybody does. dating someone that is so much older than you, takes maturity or you can really loose who you are. I think she should find herself first
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