Ok, me and this guy has been together for 2 years and 1 month...and engaged for 4 months..and well, we broke up the 11th of october and its the 22 of october today. Its started off as him not knowing what he wanted. I got together with him when i was 14 and now im 16, he was 19 and now he is 22. And our relationship was great and everything, then we started becoming distant and everything. Well then i asked him if there was another girl, and he said he had been talking to this one girl, and he gave her a hug and kiss on the cheek 2 times, but it was only as a friend and meant nothing. He said i saw it as cheating and he seen it only as a friend thing. Well, today is sunday, and last friday when i got ready to leave the pool hall, he gave me a hug and said that it would take time but hopefully we could work things out and then i left afterwards. Then this friday i called him after i got my permit and told him about it..it was like 4:30 and he was fixing to go to the pool hall to get his plack for nine ball, and me and my mom got to the pool hall after 6:30 and he was there..then he left and came back..and i went outside, and my mom came and got me and drugg me back in and said "If he wants space to think about things, give it to him" and when we got inside he spun out of the parking lot like a bat out of he** and he was mad. I figured he was starting to miss me and that is why he got mad. Well the yesterday, his friend Gene came over and said "You might be in surprise" and i said "Why?" and he goes "Well Josh will be in here in a minute" and i thought that he was gonna ask me back out cause we had been split up for a week and 3 days...well, he went over and told my mom what josh was gonna do, and it wasnt good...come to find out he had another girl with him..when i asked him about it he said that his mama wanted him to go pick her up and take her to the pool hall and get gene and then her and her boyfriend would meet them there..well, i didnt think anything about it because i knew that girl was a friend of his mama's and barry's (her boyfriend). Well friday Josh's friends was gonna take me to Hickory with them and ditch Josh, because he was being a butt hole..but i ended up not going. And when i talked to him yesteday i said "How can you just ditch and 2 year and 1 month relationship, with 4 months engagement in it?" and he said "It happens everyday" and i said "But not us" and he said "Well we did" and my grandmaw and my mama's friend just told me not to call him, if he calls me after all thats happend it obviously cause he WANTS to talk to me.. But for me to leave him along, and let him find out who he is and what he wants...and if he truely loves me he will be back. They said that sometimes it takes getting with another girl to realize how much they really care about the other people..and see he said that i couldnt have our engagement pictures because they were his copy (my mom has a copy also) and that obviously shows that he cares because why would someone want something of the person they dont care about? But they just told me that we got so serious so young, and all his guy friends are single, and that probably influenced him a bit, because he saw how much they were having fun and them not having a curfue and i do..cause im 16 and i have to listen to my mom and he is 22 and dont have to listen to his mom..and me and my mom and grandmaw and my moms friend taundra think that Josh's mom and her boyfriend, had something to do with it, because they got mad at my mom for something, and so they put it in his head that he needed someone his age and that if he did, they could all drink together, and im not old enough to drink so..i think they had something to do with it..i just want to know what anyone thinks should be done...my mom told me that if a couple weeks down the road or whatever he realizes that he doesnt like the single life, and that he really wants me back, because he loves me, then when he explains himself and proves to me that "cheating" wont happen agian..then for me to tell him that im gonna think about it and let him worry about whether im gonna say yes or no...that way he gets a scare and he will realize that i could say no..and he would be out of luck. See i know he still cares about me...but we got to argueing really bad, and i think alot of little stuff turned in to big stuff, and since we got SERIOUS at such a young age, that he just needs to find himself and find out for himself whether or not he wants me..cause until he finds out if he wants me there is nothing i can do...if and GUYS could post me an answer it would really be helpful, especiall those who are over the age of 18 because Josh is, and you may be able to see where he is coming from, and that may help answer my question..should i just leave him alone, and let him find out what he wants? Thanks for the help.

s_cianci

At age 16, being engaged to someone who is 22 is way ahead of where you should be. Ironically, he's the one who needs to find himself and doesn't know what he wants. It sounds to me like he's just not ready for anything serious. I'd forget about him and move on. Be involved in school activities with your friends. Do the things you want and enjoy, without him. Be able to enjoy life as much without him as with him. Maybe he'll come back and maybe he won't. If he does, then it can be on your terms.

Horsechic28681

well, i just think that he needs to find what he wants and find out who he is..we got so wrapped up in each other that my mom and them said that we just lost ourselves and he needs the space and just let him find out what he wants..and if he really wants you then he will come back...and if he really loves me.