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i can't stop thinking about her?
Asked Nov 12, 2010, 08:07 PM
I'm stuck. I don't know what to do. Why is this happening to me. Everyday I wish I could scream at her so that she could see what she does to me. Here's the story, I recently just moved and I'm in a new school, in a new state, senior year of high school. You would think things are already bad enough. But I think it gets worst. So, I'm the new kid and some how first period, after the teacher introduced me to the class, I did nothing but stare at the girl seating in the corner. I later found out I have gym with her.Knowing how nervous I am expecially as the new kid, I really didn't know anyone. Gym class, the same girl comes to me and begins talking to me. From there on, we became friends rather quickly. I mean, I had a crush on her, but I liked her as a friend. The first day,(friday) I totally forgot what her name was, so I didn't want to ask her what her name was until the next monday I saw her again. For some reason, I've only known her for about 1 month and a half no, but for some reason, I feel a really close connection with her. Honestly, I like her. I've gave her hints that I like her, but I really don't know if she likes me back. The only problem I have with tell her that I really like her is that I think she's a "flirt" meaning she always hugging pretty much every guy and I guess she has a lot of male friends. For some reason, I get this little jealousy. I really like her and all that, but don't know what to do?
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Nov 12, 2010, 11:02 PM
I had a very similar situation in high school, except with a guy. We had a very strong connection and I never did anything about it though because I had a boyfriend. Years later we went to different schools and we ended up finding each other on Myspace. Of course everything came out then. He told me how much he liked me, I told him how much I liked him. And I would think about him so much after we weren't at the same school, like I would long for him. I would dream about him and I honestly know it's because I didn't ever do anything or talk about it. I say you just let her know, it's scary yes. But if she's into it, think about how much it will be worth the risk. If she's flirting with other guys in front of you it could be a sign that she likes you, and wants you to see how amazing she is. I say just ask her out. The worst she can do is say no, which will only bother you for a short time and things will be fine. But if you don't and you keep feelings this way you might end up always thinking about her like I did with my guy. I really 100 percent think you should jump in there and do it, life is short. Have fun and just do it! By the way I'm a 20 year old girl :P
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Nov 13, 2010, 06:51 AM
Females do want a guy who has confidence and with your attitude, you have a low possibility of getting in a relationship with her. Man up, grow a pair, and just get to know her more.
Proceed to ask her out after you know her and she knows you.
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Emotional Health Expert
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Nov 13, 2010, 09:55 AM
It sounds like you were out at sea, on your sailboat, and suddenly, a huge storm came out of nowhere. Thunder, lightening, winds, the whole works. Suddenly, and without warning, your sailboat capsizes, and you find yourself in the turbulent sea, desperately trying to keep your head above water. You find a small floating seat cusion, and grab onto it. You are pitched agaist the wrath of nature, and you don't know if you are strong enough to weather this storm and survive.
Then you spot in the distance, a beacon! You turn your desperation into strength and use this inner strength to keep your body moving forward. In what seems like an eternity, you eventually reach the shore, but it is not familiar to you. But it offers shelter, and there are coconuts and bananas on trees, and you are very grateful- it looks like you will survive after all.
Think of the journey you are on. You were in calm waters (your old home), and suddenly faced with a storm your new home, new school). The waters are turbulant, you can't find your footing, you are drowning in confusion, lack of confidence, and solitude.
Think of the girl as the beacon, she 'rescued' you, provided comfort (safety), and warmth, and friendship.
Had she been known to you the last 10 years of your life, she would not hold such importance most likely. But, because of the circumstances, perhaps you have begun to count on her to provide more than friendship. All the fears you had at sea, she has solved for you.
Try not to expect more from her, or allow yourself to become infatuated with her, when the feelings are not reciprocated. Appreciate what she has done for you, and leave it at that.
Who knows, at some point down the road, you and her may very well have a romantic involvement, but at this stage of the game, try instead to focus on finding your way to allowing for more friendships.
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