Accepting expensive gifts

vikramg · #1 Oct 7, 2006, 12:38 AM

I am hesitating whether to accept exensive gifts such as diamond jewellery from a one year old boyfriend even though I like him. I am only 17 and he is 20. Is it okay ? Will there be any implication of this on our friendship. Please advise me whether to accept it, In case advice is to return it then whats the most quick and appropriate method of returning without hurting the friendship....Thanks

K_3 · Oct 7, 2006, 04:51 AM

Was it a gift for a special occasion? What was it and just how expensive?

vikramg · Oct 7, 2006, 06:31 AM

He gave me on my birthday whaich was three days ago. It was a set of necklace and a ring. I found out worth about 600 dollars. I was taken aback, didnt know what to do and kept it on the spur of moment. Now I dont know what to do. I like him very much. ut I am not sure whether there would be any long term implications

s_cianci · Oct 7, 2006, 07:05 AM

Usually an expensive gift like that is given as a commitment to becoming engaged. If you're not ready to progress to this stage then I wouldn't accept it. Just tell him that you can't accept such an extravagant gift at this stage. He may be trying to build up to something but if you'er not ready for that then you need to tell him.

phillysteakandcheese · Oct 7, 2006, 07:14 AM

A gift should be given without the expectation that the recipient will do some kind of favor in return.

If the gift was presented as a birthday present, you shouldn't hesitate to keep it. If it was given with strings attached, you should give it back.

talaniman · Oct 7, 2006, 11:12 AM

I think you should firmly let him know how you feel about expensive gifts and I hope we don't read his post about how much he put in a relationship only to get dumped. Its up to you to set your boundries as to what is and isn't appropriate.

vikramg · Oct 7, 2006, 12:18 PM

why do you think he gave me the expensive gift in the first place knowing that i am still so young.........................the action has made it diifficult for me decide either ways whether to keep the expensive gift or to return it at the cost of unnecessarily complicating the friendship

talaniman · Oct 7, 2006, 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vikramg

why do you think he gave me the expensive gift in the first place knowing that i am still so young.........................the action has made it diifficult for me decide either ways whether to keep the expensive gift or to return it at the cost of unnecessarily complicating the friendship

`I'm willing to bet he is trying to impress you and show how much he loves you. It is important that you let him no whether this is unnneccesary or not. Make a decision and stick to it as sometimes their is a cost to our actions as well as our inaction.

lilian79 · Oct 13, 2006, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vikramg

I am hesitating whether to accept exensive gifts such as diamond jewellery from a one year old boyfriend even though I like him. I am only 17 and he is 20. Is it okay ? Will there be any implication of this on our friendship. Please advise me whether to accept it, In case advice is to return it then whats the most quick and appropriate method of returning without hurting the friendship....Thanks

oHHHHHHHHH you need to give that thing back...when we start excepting things and making it seem like its okay for us to feel like we owe them something because they gave us that...Its not good plus you are only 17, and you are just beginning to know what you want,, and i am sure that right now you dont want someone to begin trying to control your life, because thats what its going to start happening....



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