Here's my problem. I met this guy about 9 months ago. After only going out a couple of times we started dating. It only lasted for about a month and he ended it saying he didn't think we had enough in common. Since then we have become best friends and spend a lot of time together. But we are strictly friends. I would love to get back together with him because I feel like we know each other so much better now, but I'm not sure how he feels. I want to bring up the subject but am not sure how. If he doesn't feel the same way about me I really don't want anything to ruin our friendship. What do I do??

Fr_Chuck

it is often tough for guys and girls to be "friends" often others don't understand and sometimes we ourselves forget where it starts and ends.

The problem at least from the 20 seconds of info, is that you are good (best) friends with someone you tried to date but had nothing in commom with.

Stange you can be best friends if you don't have anything in commom.
What is it that makes you friends now, what do you now have in commom you did not back then.??

But we now have a bigger issue, you now have more closer feelings.
This is the big issue since if you do nothing, don't talk to him, these feelings you have will bother you and will (possibly) effect the friendship anyway, since you will have trouble not wondering and if your desire to follow this grows, you will not be able to just be a friend even if you wanted to.

Now on the other hand if he does not feel this way, and you say something, close friendship may not be as possible anymore either.

But if the real reason was that you did not have much in commom, and now you are best friends, it sounds like you are there.

Plus I have always had issues with wording, we went out and then we starting dating, what is dating but just going out.
And the very best relationshps are started by being friends, since getting along and liking each other is the best start of a relationship

I have memories ( if I can degress for a moment to a old man memory) of this wonderful girl Martha, we used to go to plays, music events and everything, her parents just knew that I would be her husband some day. But at the time we were just "friends" and still dated others from time to time.

I really had so much other feelings for her, but I never told her, and still have not unless she is reading this. Well as life does we both found others and I have had a great life and wonderful kids. But still in the still of the night, one always wonder what happened and why as a youth did I not merley tell someone how I felt. In the end as we each found others, our friendship ended and now I don't even know where she is but in case she reads this also, I do wish her well.

don't let a maybe end up in a memory, you need to follow your heart when you can.

PrettyLady

If the guy you've dated just wants to be friends, you have to except it. It's essential that you don't try to get back with him. He should want to date you of his own accord. You need to learn to love yourself enough to choose a guy who is interested in you. If he only likes you as a friend, you will find someone to give you the love you deserve.

fredg

Hi,
I agree with the other answer about leaving the decision up to him.
If he wants you for a girlfriend, he will ask you.
It's sometimes hard to be "just a friend" if you have deeper feelings for a person. Sometimes, it's better to find new friends, and leave this one alone.
You have to decide for yourself; can you be in love with him, and just be friends? Probably not.
There are many boys out there; meet some new ones. You will find one just for you.