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    Olly23's Avatar
    Olly23 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 24, 2012, 02:47 PM
    My boyfriend never wants to have sex
    Me and my boyfriend are together for nearly 4 years and we rarely have sex. I would say once a month and we are very young. We used to do it quite often before but now almost never. I love him and I know he love's me. He is always with me pretty much every day and I know all his housemates. (girls though). We spend all day together and it is amazing we always talk about getting married etc and we imagine ourselves together for a long time. We are our best friends. He has cheat long time before because I know although he denies it till today. But every time I want to see his sell phone he gets angry and never wants to give it to me but than when he gives it to me there is never nothing just our messages and his male friends missed phone calls and family. Every time I get a change I look through his sell phone and there is never nothing. I think its weird because all our couple friends I know have sex all the time, and we don't. Is this normal?? Is it normal to not want to have sex and still love a person very much and be happy with her at the age of 20? Because I never want to do it.. neither he does to seem to... I am very worried PLEASE HELP MEEEEE. I don't know what to do or think.
    FirstChair's Avatar
    FirstChair Posts: 179, Reputation: 17
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    May 24, 2012, 04:30 PM
    The beginning of the end of a relationship is the lack of trust, even if the mistrust is justified. Either accept him for cheating and lying about it or move on. Either way, moving on or staying, you might want to be concerned about your health, if you have been having protected sex so you do not become pregnant... what are you doing to not get a sexually transmitted disease, should you be right about him not being true to you?
    CravenMorhead's Avatar
    CravenMorhead Posts: 4,532, Reputation: 1065
    Adult Sexuality Expert
     
    #3

    May 25, 2012, 11:10 AM
    Have you asked him why you're not having sex? Getting his input would be good.

    I also second what FirstChair had to say, Without trust there cannot be trust. Constantly trying to get at and check his cell phone is a lack trust. You cannot trust what he says.

    Talk to him, figure out what is going on in his head. Might help you figure out what you should do. I am almost in the Dump him side...
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,490, Reputation: 2853
    Uber Member
     
    #4

    May 25, 2012, 11:38 AM
    Your snooping on his cell phone would be really irritating to most normal people. Personally if he was me... I'm not surprised his desire for you has dropped...

    I'd rather sleep with a chunky and average but well adjusted woman over a superhot Nympho with paranoia issues...

    Trust me... nobody is worth that drama... I've walked away from a number of those types over the years before I met my wife. I'm sure a few of them have since learned their lessons and wised up.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
    Uber Member
     
    #5

    May 25, 2012, 12:28 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by smoothy View Post
    Your snooping on his cell phone would be really irritating to most normal people. Personally if he was me....I'm not surprised his desire for you has dropped...

    I'd rather sleep with a chunky and average but well adjusted woman over a superhot Nympho with paranoia issues...

    Trust me....nobody is worth that drama... I've walked away from a number of those types over the years before I met my wife. I'm sure a few of them have since learned their lessons and wised up.

    This is the best explanation I've seen posted about my concerns about snooping. Yes, well adjusted people do not snoop.

    There's the whole "when you snoop be prepared to handle what you find" issue.

    I keep posting the same thing - I'm an investigator. I work matrimonial surveillances. When people come to me with what they have found out by snooping I suggest to them that hiring me is a waste of THEIR money. They already think they know!

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