[dandds]

I am a guy with a female best friend for over 8 years. She has 4 relatively young kids. Without getting into extreme detail we love each other deeply, she is just not attracted to me. I certainly could be attracted to her. We are like inseparable family and that includes her entire family. My family does not like her. I have been with her through a failed marriage and now a live-in who is like her domestic slave. I feel sorry for him. Not long ago she bragged to him about what a great time we will be having on our beach vacation in a few weeks. He will be the babysitter. I could feel his hurt. Our relationship is platonic but I think she is getting ideas to change that. This has been my sense for a while. I could get into her on that level but we have been together so long as friends that I do not want to change it. We are very close. I do not want to risk that. On a practical level she is not the one for me. In another life she definitely would have been. We both know that. I do not know how long I can keep myself from completely falling for her. We are definitely right for each other but our life circumstances are not right for us to do well. Can we be reborn and start over again? The situation is driving me crazy. I know the smart thing and I know what I feel. I could not function without her in my life. I sense that she just might have similar problems. What should we do?

[FirstChair]

Way too many RED FLAGS you need to walk away... NO... You need to RUN AWAY! SPLIT!

21>>> RED FLAG REASONS

1. A history of 8 years and no marriage already, no sex.
2. She has 4 young children and none are YOURS.
3. You love each other deeply, but it is platonic only. Huh?
4. She is NOT attracted to YOU.
5. You are not her family, you are a friend and she is your..
6. Your family does not like her. Listen to YOUR family.
7. She has had one failed marriage, Oops, she didn't choose you.
8. She has a domestic live-in…Oops, she didn't choose you again.
9. You very well could become her second domestic slave.
10. You feel sorry for her live-in…you should start feeling sorry for yourself.
11. She will be on a beach with someone else and you will be babysitting, HER kids!
12. You could feel his hurt... remember his face; it's a future reflection of YOU.
13. Oh No!. Number 13! She's getting ideas to pull you into her Web... Oh... I meant Bed!
14. “On a practical level she is not the one for me.” Well all right, end of subject.
15. You don't want to risk the friendship if you become lovers. Huh?
16. While you are falling for her…what will she be doing? Just asking.
17. Our life circumstances are not right for us to do well. Well all right, end of subject, again.
18. The situation is driving me crazy. You mean you're not already?!
19. What you are feeling is NOT SMART!
20. I could not function without her in my life. You are NOT functioning now.
21. What to do…since you can't split the sheets…maybe you could just SPLIT out the door!

Epilogue:
Not in this lifetime darlin'
The stars are not in align
Hold on to your manly
Go be with Your family!

[JudyKayTee]

She is looking for a port in a storm - for the moment it's you.

You are best friends with a woman who treats other people this badly?

I do notice you have posted you are a Sheik so I am assuming this is not in the US - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/islam/...ml#post3129455

[Homegirl 50]

She does not sound like a very pleasant person. As poorly as she treats her current man, why would you even entertain thoughts of her.
I think you ought to at least show her man some respect by not spending so much time with her. That is just rude.

[dandds]

She is looking for a port in a storm - for the moment it's you.

You are best friends with a woman who treats other people this badly?

I do notice you have posted you are a Sheik so I am assuming this is not in the US - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/islam/...ml#post3129455

Why are you assuming that?