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mysonismylife13 · Jul 21, 2009, 06:17 PM

OK well I'm currently on probation and I'm 14. I have only like two weeks left and I've been staying out of trouble. She found out that I am going out with an 18 year old we haven't had sex and she says that I can't talk to him. I love him with all my heart. He looked up the statutory rape laws here and it says as long as we don't have sex he can't get in trouble for it. Is she aloud to tell me I can't talk to him? :confused:

N0help4u · Jul 21, 2009, 06:20 PM

You say you only have two weeks left so why not to keep on the safe side don't! You wait the two weeks without talking to him?
Is that a unique concept?

Or is she saying you can not talk even after the 2 weeks? She may or may not be allowed to do that.

You need to have some self control here. Why jepordize your boyfriend as well as yourself because you feel a need to keep talking to him?

If your po says do not talk to him-DO NOT talk to him.

Also him being 18 and you being 14 you would HAVE to wait until 16 or 18 for sex with him depending on your state law.

s_cianci · Jul 21, 2009, 07:01 PM

Yep - she sure is. He's an adult and you're a minor. It doesn't matter whether you're having sex or not. In fact, your PO pretty much has complete say in who you can and can't associate with, regardless of age or any other factor. What do your parents have to say about you dating an 18-year-old? No daughter of mine would ever date someone that much older than she with my approval, whether on probation or not, that's for sure. But adhering to the legal technicalities of your situation, you've only got 2 weeks to go so surely you can keep your nose clean for that long.

twinkiedooter · Jul 21, 2009, 07:09 PM

I know that 2 weeks can seem like an eternity when you are 14 - but - how about starting back at zero and having to do your probation all over again if the PO disapproves of this situation and decides to violate you for hanging out with an older guy. Don't risk your freedom. Two weeks will pass quickly. Then you will be off probation and can see anyone you wish and go anywhere you wish (as long as it's okay with your parents that is).

Fr_Chuck · Jul 21, 2009, 07:11 PM

You are a minor and this would be Juv probation. They can set rules up for almost any part of your life.

I would hope your parents continue this, since a 14 year old does not need to be going out with a 18 year old

excon · Jul 22, 2009, 07:23 AM

Hello my:

I don't think she can... But she DID, and in order for you to defend yourself against any possible reprecussions, you're going to need to Prove that she is overstepping her authority... That's going to take a lawyer.

Plus, she's going to cause you a lot of trouble whether she has the legal right to do so or not.

What?? You think cops and PO's care what the law is?? Nah, they think THEY are the law...

Nonetheless, you've only got two weeks to go... You can manage not to see him for two weeks, can't you?

excon

mysonismylife13 · Jul 25, 2009, 09:12 AM

Actually I don't have two weeks she is going to extend it to December. I don't know why she hasn't given me a good reason and my parents think that he's the best guy I've gone out with he's the only one that hasn't gotten into trouble and doesn't smoke pot so my parents are happier that I be with him then the actual babies dad.

mysonismylife13 · Jul 25, 2009, 09:14 AM

Originally Posted by excon

hello my:

I don't think she can... But she did, and in order for you to defend yourself against any possible reprecussions, you're going to need to proove that she is overstepping her authority... That's going to take a lawyer.

Plus, she's going to cause you a lot of trouble whether she has the legal right to do so or not.

What??? You think cops and po's care what the law is???? Nah, they think they are the law....

Nonetheless, you've only got two weeks to go.... You can manage not to see him for two weeks, can't you?

Excon

actually I have till December she extended it for no reason...

s_cianci · Jul 25, 2009, 09:22 AM

Originally Posted by mysonismylife13

actually i have till December she extended it for no reason...

Now this I find questionable. If your sentence was in fact due to expire 2 weeks from when you wrote your initial post then I don't see how your PO can usurp the judge's authority and just extend your sentence. When you get the chance you may want to say something like "With all due respect, may I ask why my probation is being extended? It was my understanding that it was due to end on mm/dd but now you're extending it to December. And I honestly do believe that I've adhered to all of the conditions of my probation so this is very disappointing." Maybe the fact that you were toying around with the idea of seeing the 18-year-old did it. But even so, she can violate you and take you back in front of the judge but I don't believe that she can just decide to extend it of her own accord. But if you choose to go through all of the legal hoops to fight it, by the time you sorted everything out it'd probably be December anyhow and that's her ace in the hole.

excon · Jul 25, 2009, 09:22 AM

Hello again, my:

Then go find a lawyer who will represent you. That's the ONLY way to fight her. If you can't do that, then do what she says till December.

Do I think you can find a lawyer who will represent you FREE of charge?? I DO, but I think you're really going to have to work for it. You'll have to put up with a lot no's before you get to a yes.

excon