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jenny_hhuang · Oct 7, 2008, 12:34 PM

My ex-husband and I were divorced 3 years ago. I and my 5-year old daughter live in California while he lives in New York. He works on Wall Street and has good income. He's been paying child support and probably visit her one hour once a year. There were very few contacts between us.

There were lots of resentment on his part when we divorced. He has been dating girls who resent the fact that he has a daughter. I do not call or harass him in any way. Still he wants to cut off all contacts with us by disowning her. He said that he is not trying to avoid child support, he just wants to cut off all contacts with us. He is willing to pay all the rest of the 12 years of child support in lum sum and ask me to give him a number.

Aside this behavior being extremely immature and stupid, will the court in California allow him to give up his rights even if I say so? There is no one who plans to adopt my daughter. Please help. Thank you.

ScottGem · Oct 7, 2008, 12:52 PM

No the courts will not allow him to relinquish his rights. But it won't force him to use them. So that's the same thing.

As for a lump sum payment, I'm not sure if the court will allow it. But if they did, I would just multiply the payments out until your daughter is 24 (figuring going to college). Let him pay that and you invest it.

jenny_hhuang · Oct 7, 2008, 01:07 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

No the courts will not allow him to relinquish his rights. But it won't force him to use them. So that's the same thing.

As for a lump sum payment, I'm not sure if the court will allow it. But if they did, I would just multiply the payments out until your daughter is 24 (figuring going to college). Let him pay that and you invest it.

Thank you so much for the answer.

cdad · Oct 7, 2008, 01:23 PM

I think some details have been left out. For one thing besides child support he is responsible for 1/2 her medical needs which include dental and he also should be providing insurance for your child. I don't really see the courts approving any plan that goes beyond the 5 year mark because so much can change. Another thing being that he is NOT required to pay for her collage expenses so that is something you would have to agree upon. Having said that.. what would happen if she chooses not to go to collage ? Will you have to refund the money ? Its more involved then just making up a multiple of the monthly payment. 13 years is a long time.