Friend being harassed by neighbor

Sassy4556 · Jan 30, 2006, 09:54 AM

I have a friend in my neighborhood who is being harassed by his next door neighbor. He's calling the city on all kinds of violations ( some warranted), he looks into my friends home, spies on his wife, peeks over his fence, and is generally making his life miserable. Has anyone else had a neighbor like this, and what can my friend do? P.S. I also have a very annoying neighbor with bratty kids and would also like to know what the best option is for these kinds of neighbors. Thanks. - Sassy in Maryland

rcutting · Jul 22, 2007, 06:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hi3456

I'VE HAD ENOUGH

Maybe your friends deserve what they're getting Sally. Since the day I moved in several years ago my neighbors have been calling me name's such as "gringa" and threatening to kill me. They've written racist remarks and gang insignia in chalk on my driveway. My neighbor's children have tried to spread slander calling me a "whore" and a "trick" through the walls. I feel like I'm being sexually harassed with their slander, but because they are only five to ten year old children they can't get in trouble for it. They throw garbage in my driveway, and hang out in front of my door making all sorts of noise. They kick my wall and slam things into my door, and then act completely innocent pretending that they have done nothing. When I go to the bathroom, they laugh loudly enough for me to hear my privacy is being invaded. They call me a "playahater", and the adults have threatened to kill me and set me up. Whenever they call me a "playahater" I respond by saying, "that's because there's nothing worth loving." Their friends who sit out on the curb drinking 40's in front of my home with the street people and gangsters have threatened if I call the cops they will frame me for their crimes. Then when I get mad and yell at them they all become quiet and act like I'm crazy and we're all living in the picture perfect neighborhood. The threats continue, but I'm afraid to call the cops because they have threatened to set me up as a "trick". Whenever these little six year old children call me a "trick" I feel as if they are actually violating me. I've warned them that if they continue to spread slander against me calling me "trick" I will report it as sexual harassment. What are these people? Some sort of sociopath? They have also threatened to kill my cat and eat it for dinner. These are several sets of neighbors doing this at once, and they are all friendly with eachother. I've been using tactics with them, and it's better getting better, but I don't want it to ever go back to how it was before again. I want this to stop completely, but when I speak to authorities they refuse to do anything about it. Whenever I do anything to vituperate them people act like I'm the one that is wrong. I need some suggestions for how to get back at these people and keep them in line without having to break the law or turn to the law and set myself up to be predated by their gangsters. I need to get control of this situation fast.

No one ever deserves to be harassed by anyone, not alone neighbors. It's the same with some rape victims. People are so quick to blame the victim instead of where the blame really lies. Is that what you meant, or maybe I just misunderstood?

rcutting

rcutting · Jul 22, 2007, 07:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RubyPitbull

Hi, it might have been easier if you had created your own post and not piggybacked your problem onto a post that is over a year old. Due to it's age, I don't think any of the original posters will see yours. But, at least I have found it and someone else may stop by.

I see that you are frustrated and angry. I wish I had an answer for you but your post is confusing to me.

I have pulled this out of your post because it disturbs me. Why would you want to "get back at these people?" Forgive me, but that doesn't sound like a mature adult wanting to resolve a conflict with children. Instead of "getting back" at them, you should be trying to figure out a way to put an end to all this. You all don't have to like each other, but if you can find a way to resolve the conflicts, you will be able to quietly enjoy your lives again. Frankly, this sounds like there is a problem that stems from a difference in ethnicity rather than unprovoked harassment by some neighborhood kids. I do apologize if this offends you, but I have to question why ALL of them seem to be ganging up on you. That just doesn't make sense to me. Why would they be doing this? It can't just be because you are a "gringa" and they aren't, could it? I can see how small children will follow the lead of older ones, but this had to stem from an original disagreement with one person for this kind of harrassment to get to this point. Was there a specific incident that lead to this buildup of apparent enmity? Can you elaborate please? I will try my best to come up with a constructive solution, as I am sure others on this forum will do as well, if you can help us to understand this whole situation better.

I have to beg the differ with you on your answer. My family and I were harassed by neighbors a few years back and it was completely unprovoked. And even if you have words with a neighbor, you do not deserve to be harassed no matter what. Our experience was the most devastating of anything we had ever gone through. Jealousy, gossip, property damage and legal abuse played a major role in what happened to us and I would never wish our demise on anyone. Neighbors joined forces against us and we were in for the most evil ride of our lives. People that have never been through such an experience may not understand what happens to the people who been through it. I am not saying that anyone should retaliate, but you never know what a person put into a situation like that might do. My family and I gave up our home in preference to retaliating, but we have had episodes of wanting to go back and get even with the ones who broke up our happy lives to the point that we have never been the same since, but instead of getting even, I started an organization instead. If you would like to respond via email, I included it below. I am actually researching people who are being harassed by neighbors. I even started an organization called, "Citizen's Against Legal and Moral Abuse, Inc."

rcutting
[email address]

bonoo · Aug 6, 2007, 08:38 PM

why don't you install couple of surveillance cameras at your home directing towards your neighbors. Whenever they do something to harass you it will be recorded. take print out of their unlawful activity from surveillance tape and show it to them or keep it in a place where they would see it (anyways there are always watching your house so they will definitely see it) having proof in print must be enough to scare them. also tell them that you would give it to police.

TheRage · Aug 16, 2007, 07:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bonoo

why don't you install couple of surveillance cameras at your home directing towards your neighbors. Whenever they do something to harass you it will be recorded. take print out of their unlawful activity from surveillance tape and show it to them or keep it in a place where they would see it (anyways there are always watching your house so they will definitely see it) having proof in print must be enough to scare them. also tell them that you would give it to police.

If it's gotten that bad, don't tell the neighbor, just give a COPY of the video/soundbytes to the local authorities as well as a civil attorney. AND one note of warning, in SOME states, the tables can be turned on you for "illegal surveillance" classified as almost "stalking" from the video standpoint BUT anything audio-wise you pickup is legal.

I've been told to ignore it by the local sherriff..It's just childish on both parts. I informed the officer that when this guy started tailgaiting and following/stalking me outside my property, on the public streets, it was no-longer "childs play/neighbor's dispute" to a minimum of a misdimeanor in the 2nd degree. IE..A CRIME.

Was told "we just had to get along" (Translation: Quit calling the Sherriff). OR, "MOVE".
The guys wife is the instigator..She has "connections" thru an Uncle (former gamewarden for the county) and another relative, semi-high up in the county gas authority/coop SO I'm beginning to believe the root of my problem is the "Good Ole Boy" system might just be protecting this guy.

I'm urging vigilance and care. AND offer you a quote from an unknown source (at this time)

"Silence is often more YELLOW than Golden".

You have a RIGHT to be left alone...The law needs to do its job in preserving that right.
Stay on them!

nilbog · Sep 14, 2007, 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bonoo

why don't you install couple of surveillance cameras at your home directing towards your neighbors. Whenever they do something to harass you it will be recorded. take print out of their unlawful activity from surveillance tape and show it to them or keep it in a place where they would see it (anyways there are always watching your house so they will definitely see it) having proof in print must be enough to scare them. also tell them that you would give it to police.

Good Idea. He can be arrested.

TheRage · Oct 14, 2007, 07:41 PM

The situation I've got has up until today, slacked-off.. Neighbor did wait for me at the gate of the local garbage dump (we have to take our own trash in this county to the landfill) in his black Toyota truck. Drove off before I was thru. THEN, on the way home, saw him waiting at an intersection of Hwy 66 and Pinto Road. He pulled out behind me. He stayed back about 200 yds. Went to the Gas station in the small town I was shopping at, then followed me across the street to the lotto location. Now have three witnesses to at a minimum, bizarre behavior. The girl at the lotto location even used the term "Creepy" describing the guys behavior. He was wasted/trippin'.

Called the law. They gave me the same run-around. "We can go talk to him" routine. Told them, no problem now, he's home in bed (Checked with the friendly neighbor across the street from my home who has had his own daughter followed by this guyi in the past). Just wanted to have my call documented so IF this guy hurts me or my property, IE dogs, I can sue the crap out of the County.

It's not a matter of IF but WHEN he goes down for this crap. AND as of last week, some of his so-called buddies ain't been too friendly with him as in the past. They realize at a minimum, he's wasted most of the time/a bad influence on their kids.

The time-lapse recorder has been dusted off however and once I get an RCA to BNC adapter, it goes online with a separate (unseen to him) cam. My brother is finally taking a more proactive look at this duffus as well.

Hope this helps someone else in a similar situation.

latinlita · Oct 23, 2007, 07:45 PM

Tell your friend to set up a video camera and post no trespassing signs. That way when they catch the perv on video he can be prosecuted for their behavior

gmjm56 · Jun 21, 2008, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rcutting

I have to beg the differ with you on your answer. My family and I were harassed by neighbors a few years back and it was completely unprovoked. And even if you have words with a neighbor, you do not deserve to be harassed no matter what. Our experience was the most devastating of anything we had ever gone through. Jealousy, gossip, property damage and legal abuse played a major role in what happened to us and I would never wish our demise on anyone. Neighbors joined forces against us and we were in for the most evil ride of our lives. People that have never been through such an experience may not understand what happens to the people who been through it. I am not saying that anyone should retaliate, but you never know what a person put into a situation like that might do. My family and I gave up our home in preference to retaliating, but we have had episodes of wanting to go back and get even with the ones who broke up our happy lives to the point that we have never been the same since, but instead of getting even, I started an organization instead. If you would like to respond via email, I included it below. I am actually researching people who are being harassed by neighbors. I even started an organization called, "Citizen's Against Legal and Moral Abuse, Inc."

rcutting
[email address]

I can relate to all of the above because I have been through it. I have NEVER seen such juvenile behavior as I have seen in the neighborhood I live in. I have a neighbor who cannot just disagree with you on his own. He has to join forces with others like kids do in junior high school. I think if you calculated his IQ, you'd find he has no more than an IQ of a kid! Twenty years ago, he put me through living hell. There were different people living here then who went along with the constant abuse of me and my family. WHY?? Because we had put on a 50,000 extention on our house and they were jealous. It had NOTHING to do with us giving them a hard time or exchanging words, etc. NO words were ever exchanged! They wanted us gone and wanted to see us move due to jealousy and they guessed that if they harrassed me enough, they'd force me out. Twenty years later, I'm still here; unfortunately, so is the neighbor who tried forcing me out. Recently, we've had problems again with him caused mostly by his daughter. I vowed years ago, that I would never take the harrassment that I went through EVER again. He and my husband exchanged words last weekend because we put up a new 8 foot fence along the property line. I HAD to get a new fence because this neighbor broke the last one. Anyway, words were exchanged! Since my husband has taken a more active role in defending me, this idiot has somewhat backed down. Seems he can't bully my husband, like he bullied me. He is still at his tricks, however, of trying to call others into the fray......however, there are more reputable people now living in this area, who thankfully aren't lemmings and have already told him to bug off.

rcutting · Jun 22, 2008, 07:34 AM

Hi, gmjm56:

Do you mind emailing me? I don't have your full email address so I can't email you directly.

[email address]

yvonne37 · Jun 23, 2008, 02:12 PM

first of all your friend needs to make a journal of everything that happens this provides evidence and proof, then report to the appropriate councils in which they should be able to resolve this problem.