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I'm getting married this summer...
in what ways will he "rule" me? I'm fine with it if it's in a kind, loving, caring way. i'm fine with him not wanting me to go out drinking, not wanting me to have male friends he doesn't like, and i'm fine with him making big decisions in our live such as where we're going to live. But i don't like the idea of him telling me to go get him a glass of water when he's too lazy- i would just to be nice but if he DEMANDED it, that's another thing. he's not like that though and i couldn't think of a related example between the two of us. but here's one:
sometimes he won't let me go out with my friends because he thinks guys will hit on me. Is that ok? i never get to go out, especially with the friends he doesn't like, one of which i have been friends with since kindergarten. He doesn't even like it when i'm just at her house (with no other guys around). he just doesn't like her and doesn't want me to be with her.
where do you draw the line of "ruling" the woman.
what i'm basicaly trying to ask is what kind of authority does he have over me. i don't want to be treated like a slave or a child. Do i have to do everything he says? do i have say in anything? Especially if my significant purpose is to be a mother, do i have to do what he says when it comes to parenting?
For, example, he thinks that when we have teenagers we should let them drink if they wish but only in our home so that they are safe . I think that's just a way of telling them it's ok when it's not. I like the idea of telling them to never do it but if they slip up and drink and are in a bad situation, regret it, need my help, whatever, to just call me no matter what time it is so i can help And get them out of a bad situation. I'm getting way ahead of the game since we don't even have kids yet but in this situation would i just have to let my kids drink in my house since he's the "ruler" of the household? and drinking in moderation isn't even against the bible (or am i wrong?) so i couldn't use the argument of following god's word before his.
and what about the roles of a woman:
She should also prepare healthy, nourishing meals in accordance with the food laws. See the papers Vegetarianism and the Bible (No. 183) and The Food Laws (No. 15); cf. also Leviticus 11:1-47 and Deuteronomy 14:21.
what if he's a better cook and refuses to eat my food because it tastes so bad? ha ha.
PLEASE USE BIBLE PASSAGES TO BACK UP YOUR OPINIONS
And there's really no such thing as something "not specifically proscribed in the Bible." The answer to literally any question is there.
I meant forbidden. For example, slavery is not forbidden by the Bible. Poor ergonomics are not specifically forbidden, but that doesn't mean that stooping over a laptop for 8 hours is a good thing!
I meant forbidden. For example, slavery is not forbidden by the Bible. Poor ergonomics are not specifically forbidden, but that doesn't mean that stooping over a laptop for 8 hours is a good thing!
Out of greenies but I am giving you 10 out of 10 - very funny.
The husband should be the final authority as he is suppose to be the head of the house. That is in a perfect world. That is how the Lord Jesus would Ideally want it.
The final authority? Still really having a problem with this. This whole thing leaves a very bad taste in my mouth and is another point in favor of not being a Christian. No one has authority over me, absolutely no one!
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Also remember that the husbands have been told to LOVE their wives as Christ loves the church. When a husband does THIS very thing..it isn't hard to submit to him. And remember, the husband should always considered the womans feelings and ideas. A man that truely loves his wife...compromises.
Again, Ahhhhhhh! Submit? Not going to happen, not in my life, not in my marriage, and I've been married for 14 years, so obviously we're doing something right. My husband wouldn't even dare to tell me what to do, he knows he'd be 6 feet under in the yard quicker then he could take it back. I don't care if he's sweet as pie about it, loving and nice, there will be no submission in this household.
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There ARE times when perhaps there is a really hard decision to make and if the man is truely the type of man that the Lord has outlined. Then I DO think it is appropriate to follow his lead. If it should be the wrong decision ...the Lord will take care of the wife and kids for obeying.
I am now banging my head on the desk. Every decision that comes our way is made together. If we don't agree, we compromise. I don't follow, I don't obey, that's what my dogs do.
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NOTE: The Lord has made women in general to have MUCH influence over their husbands...you see it over and over in the Bible. Everything in balance really does work.
When you're equal, you don't need to influence, you just discuss.
Again, it's the OP's choice, her religion, I'm just having a hard time getting my head around this. I can't believe that people still live like this. I thought we had progressed, that women had made giant leaps forward.
I wish the OP all the luck in the world, I hope she's not as strong willed as I am, otherwise, the requirements to be a good Christian wife are going to be the end of her.
ok,. But i wanted to make sure you understood what the Bible actual means when the wives are asked to submit to their husbands. Like i said, when a huband loves his wife like Christ loves the church...it really does work. BUT i want to make clear it is WHEN. It isn't about being "OVER or ABOVE" her. A man who loves his wife doesn't think like that..he considers her in all matters as she should him. The Lord doesn't want anyone to be the lesser in the marriage. He simply put a GODLY Christian man who follows Jesus in the home as the head. The bible also says that the wife and husband are to submit to each other as well. All i am pointing out is that is shouldn't be taken out of context or misunderstood. It is what it is in the Bible but it ain't what it ain't either. and I do believe it works in a Christian home where BOTH are submitted to one another, love one another, trust one another and most importantly believe that Jesus knows what he is doing.
As far as women having influence over men...that is just a FACT of life. Take a look at history..Christian and non Christians.
I am a strong willed woman myself and there is nothing in the world wrong with that. It is part of my personality. I trust the Lord Jesus and his word ANYWAY.
Judy, please, the men are talking here. How about you head back into the kitchen and me a sandwich, ok honey?
IF you THINK this is what the Apsotle Paul meant when he wrote about submission under the inspiration of the HOLY Spirit then you are IGNORANT at best. It is belittling NOT ONLY to women..but to ME as a Christian woman. That passage about wives submitting wasn't written to YOU or FOR you. It was written to the Christian woman. soooooooo.... Hows bout you run along and go show your brillance elsewhere ....ok stud muffin?
ClassyT, I respect your belief, I just don't follow your belief.
To me the bible is still just an interesting story, but I don't want to start that convo again.
Like I said before, women weren't even considered human beings then, they had no rights, and the bible was written with that in mind, nes pas?
Surely even God would realize that the rules he set out back then don't work in today's world. You see, women are human beings now, we're allowed to wear shoes, walk alongside a man, vote, work for equal pay, fight in wars and everything. Does God really expect those women, ones that fight and die alongside men, to go home and submit to their husbands?
I just don't understand why people would use a very old book to determine how to live their lives in 2009! Times have changed, surely even God can accept that.
IF you THINK this is what the Apsotle Paul meant when he wrote about submission under the inspiration of the HOLY Spirit then you are IGNORANT at best. It is belittling NOT ONLY to women..but to ME as a Christian woman. That passage about wives submitting wasn't written to YOU or FOR you. It was written to the Christian woman. soooooooo.... Hows bout you run along and go show your brillance elsewhere ....ok stud muffin?
At least she recognizes my stud-muffinness.
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