What are the best disapline methods for a child that just seems unggreatful and rude constantly.

bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE

There is no 'one' best method for discipline.

How old is your child?

justcurious55

how old is the child? and what specifically are they doing that is rude?

J_9

I'm sorry, but there is not enough info here to even begin to give a proper response.

We need to know the age of the child, the behavior of the child and what methods of discipline you have tried.

progunr

I dunno, a quick backhand across the chops always set me straight. Put a quick stop to the behavior, that was needing an adjustment.
Before anyone slams me, I'm not advocating violence, just stating the fact that a little corporal punishment never hurt me, in fact, I'm glad it happened. I turned out pretty well I guess, especially when I see some of todays kids, and how they behave.

sgillen

My daughter is 11yrs old. She complains about everything and has a smart pants remark for everything that I ask her to do or tell her. When she is in trouble for this behavior or for not doing chores or not completing homework a fight arises between us. Me telling her what and why she has to commit to something and complete it. And her telling me it's a lye about what is done or to mind my own business.
I have tried taking things away, grounding, writing lines and even spanked her on the butt.
Nothing seems to bother her enough to stop.
She also has huge arguements with my spouse who is not her father. But he treats her like she is his daughter. He's really good to her and she will tell him she don't have to listen to him because he's not her father. I tell her not to talk to him like that and send her to her room. When she goes there she throw things, screams and slams doors.
This episode can sometimes continue for up to an hour. I hope this is enough detail for a good answer.

justcurious55

most kids go through this phase. you have to keep being patient with her, i know its hard. and it doesn't make her behavior ok, but she's probably going through a lot right now with puberty and i remember when i was about that age is when the girls i went to school with started being really catty and the cliques really started to form. i would say at this age corporal (sp?) is absolutely not an option, she'll likely only resent you more. the best way to end the arguments, don't engage. if she gives you attitude and you say "i've told you not to ___, you're grounded" and when she starts in with the "but mom...that not fair...blah blah blah." tell her again that she's grounded and its not up for discussion and then just leave it. if you won't engage she can't very well fight with you. screaming you can ignore. warn her, if she slams the door again, its coming off (my friend didn't believe her parents because they always said it and never did it. then one day they finally did and she had nothing but a sheet in her doorway for a week. she stopped slamming the door after that). as for the throwing, i don't have any suggestions. don't forget to acknowledge when she does do things right too. even if its something small, like remembering to put her plate in the sink without being asked, thank her for it, she might just be looking for attention and if thats the case that tiny acknowledgement can go a long way.

lrieken

[quote=justcurious55]the best way to end the arguments, don't engage. if she gives you attitude and you say "i've told you not to ___, you're grounded" and when she starts in with the "but mom...that not fair...blah blah blah." tell her again that she's grounded and its not up for discussion and then just leave it. if you won't engage she can't very well fight with you. If she slams the door again, its coming off

RIGHT ON, RIGHT ON! I am a mother of 4...ages 21, 17, 14, and 10. I also am a special education teacher of behavior students..17 years in elementary k-5 and now 3 years in grades 10-12. Everything you said is right on according to my experiences. Children are all different and what works for one may not work another, but mean what you say and say what you mean...ALWAYS! Avoid power struggles. It seems that if this behavior is continuing, she is getting what she wants from it--even if that is the attention of the arguing itself! It appears to me that she has your "number" and she uses quite frequently. A suggestion on the throwing things, remove things from her room...she can't throw what isn't there--and keep them removed. If she enjoys having things, she must respect what she has. As for grounding, this is effective as long as it is meaningful. Maybe you are grounding her from the wrong things??? Determine what is important to her. I learned over the years that sometimes when I "grounded" my kids, I was actually punishing myself because what I took away meant more to me than to them...TV, etc. I took a cell phone away from my 17 year old and locked in my safe. She was devastated! She begged to use mine and I simply said "No"..no discussion. She attempted to argue and I walked away leaving her to argue with the wall. I kept a good long time and by the time she got it back she decided her disrespect wasn't worth the price. I also like the part about acknowledging the positives. If she doesn't seem appreciative, you may try a "grateful journal". I do this with my family. We all have to write down 5 things that we are thankful for each evening. We cannot use the same thing twice. If they don't do it, then they don't get use of whatever is important to them, TV, phone, computer, games, friends, etc. The idea is to get them thinking about the good things rather than the negative things. Anyway, just some suggestions. I empathize with you. Hope this helps.