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Home > Family & People > Children   »   untrusting mother

 
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Old Jul 29, 2007, 06:43 PM
imxinxonxit
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untrusting mother

well i was caught listening to my 14 year olds conversation with her boyfriend she has had some sexual talk with him and she really doesn't understand what this makes her sound like. she is still a virgin but trys to act like she is miss hot stuff.Iv'e told her she shouldn't talk like that because boys get the wrong impression of you.She still does it. my husband says she is to young to have a boyfriend ,maybe so but she seems so down if she doesn't talk to him. I feel bad listening but i can't help but worry about her and the things they talk about.him masterbating and her telling him to do it. i was young once and i would never have talked like that .Should i let her have her privacy?

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Old Jul 31, 2007, 08:03 PM   #21  
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thanks for your help,i ask my daughter if she would like to help out raising a puppy for the visually impared and help out at a shelter, she loves animals,we have 4 pomeranians 2 that we show.she has taken junior handleing classes. so i'm thinking this might be a good thing to get involved in. 4H also.well we could branch out and do alittle of everything.my older daughter was in the ffa and she loved it ,it was very rewarding to be honored for all the work she did and to get a scholarship.

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bushg agrees: thats a great idea, But I love dogs, pom especially. Keeping her busy in good constructive ways is the way to go.
ScottGem agrees: a great idea, keep her involved.
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Old Jul 31, 2007, 08:08 PM   #22  
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thanks go-ask-mom for your help
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Old Aug 1, 2007, 06:11 PM   #23  
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No problem.....let us know how things turn out for you. I'm sure theres a wealth of other ideas/suggestions to tap into, but not knowing her exact likes/dislikes makes it a little hard.

Just as you suggested- volunteering at an animal hospital....thats a great idea!! Anything that gets her mind off of boys (if thats possible at this age!) and keeps her focused in the right direction! 4-H and FFA also have a lot to offer....it's not just "farming" anymore!! Good luck to you hun during these difficult times!! ((hugz!))
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Old Aug 9, 2007, 05:06 PM   #24  
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I have a 13yr old and a 16yr old. And there is alot of days I feel hated but they also know that being angry with me will not change the rules. Rule #1 all phone calls are to be held in the living room so that I can monitor any inappropriate conversations. Rule #2 If there to have boyfriends they are only allowed to spend time with them in our home so as to make sure that they are showing proper behavior. Rule #3 If they do go anywhere with a boy it is only in a group setting with a parent chaperon that I have approved of and spoke with before hand. And I have also went as far as finding material in books and on the web of STD to show them what they can do to there bodies from making poor choices. Needless to say my 16yr old is a little hesitant about boy friends. And my 13yr old chooses to just have "friends" that she just talks to.
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Old Aug 9, 2007, 07:22 PM   #25  
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Well this is a hard one u should really respect ypur daughters privacy but from a mothers prospective i understand your concern but if you plan on talkin to her im sure she isnt going to listen to you it is going to make her want to ignore excatly what you said and my suggestion is to get a family member in college prefferably a female who understands what she is going through to talk to her about how she feels about her boyfriend and things they talk about
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Old Aug 9, 2007, 07:27 PM   #26  
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I'm 16 and in my opinion, I would be ticked if I knew my mother was listening in on my conversations. I wish she would have though. I'm 14 weeks pregnant. Keep talking to her...make sure she knows about safe sex and if you are really that concerned...take her to the doctor and get her birth control. Make sure she knows that she can come to you for anything and if she comes to you with some sort of sex related question answer it as honest as you can. Be a good mum be there and talk it's the most important thing you can do..
Don't let her become another pregnant teen statistic because talking that way and doing those things....it leads to so much more...I gave up my virginity before I was ready...To someone I thought i loved...Boy was I wrong
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