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    rajeswarry's Avatar
    rajeswarry Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 3, 2009, 09:40 AM
    I am very disturbed
    I have been married for about 10 years. I tell you the truth. I have lost all my love for the man that I love 10 years agao until until I suddely found that I am in love with my ex-boyfriend. It was not my fault. My husband always hurts my feeling by saying all bad words and he keep on neglecting me. You know, 10 yars of marriage he never ever buy me a single thing that I like. Wat ever I like, he don't like. Frankly till today, I still don't now whether he loves me or not. He always mentioned that I only living with him just becos of my only son. It hurts me a lot. I have feeling that I want to have divorce with him an continue my own way. He don't want me to go for work becos he don't want me to have my own maoney and the excuse is my son nobody takes care. He is 7 years .Come onlah. 10 years I am suffering from mental torture that he gave me every time he come home after works.I am very disturbed . He make me crazy and unwanted. He talks like he knows everything and his down never wake up. He blames everything on me.If not of my son I would divorce and live without any mental torture.He said if I leave him, he will be more and more happy. But he wants only my son not me. If my boyfriend haven got maried I would marry him.But thing doesn't seem like that. I ma stuck here for 10 years and I am blur. He got car and house on his name. He treads me like hell. He have so many problem yet to be blame on me. I don't know what to do? Advise.
    posey_84's Avatar
    posey_84 Posts: 202, Reputation: 15
    Full Member
     
    #2

    Mar 3, 2009, 10:00 AM

    Oh you have to leave please do it! Don't think your doing the best for your son by staying there because your not, children pick up on everything and your son will be no different. Besides what kind of a role model is your husband for your son? Do you want your son to turn out the same and treat his wife the same? Am sure you don't. If you don't leave and stick around for another 10 years your son could begin to resent you for keeping him there. You should be the role model for your son by being strong and leaving and making a better life because you both deserve better xxxx
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #3

    Mar 3, 2009, 04:13 PM
    10 years is a long time to invest in a marriage, and you share a 7 year old together.

    Before I would leave, I would explore all available options. To keep everything simmering inside without being able to express yourself is not healthy, and will not mend what is broken.

    If you try to seek therapy, for both of you, or for yourself, and have someone listen to your concerns and offer advice and guidance, you may surprise yourself as to his reaction, when he finally realizes you are seriously thinking of leaving him, if issues are not resolved one way or the other.

    Maybe he is not a good communicator, but with some help, and motivation, he may at least try.

    He may never be the perfect mate, but if it is possible at all to make an effort for improvement, then I'd go that route first before I just gave up.

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