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This question maybe should be in the education area, but there are some "emotional" aspects to it so I thought I'd post it here.
My children will be in school very shortly. Two of mine are both starting school, and I'm also currently taking care of 2 nephews and a niece, who are also school age. All 5 kids are under the age of 10.
I received a list of what all the kids will need from the school. Basic school supplies are very cheap, but I wondering if it's important for the kids to have "trendy" supplies, or supplies with their favorite characters on them, etc. I mean, is it important in terms of the kids doing better in school, and feeling better about themselves? Will the other kids tease them if their supplies are not trendy? We are not poor by any means, but I do want to keep costs down as much as possible, especially since I have to buy things for 5 children! Clothes present a similar issue. Thanks for any suggestions or advice.
Ahhh. Chava, I just went through this... sent the kiddos off to school today.
Here is my take....
Usually the schools give the list, which they did in your case.... My list contained items like red folder for science....blue folder for math...etc and Rae wanted trendy (she is in 7th grade) so what I did was followed the list to a T.
If the lists do not contain specific colors then buy what you want....if the list contains colors or brands for example, buy exactly what is on the list.
Rae has decided that she will decorate her folders and binders her own individual way, but she is artistic like you.
Then what I did was let her pick out all of the trendy stuff that she liked. We put those on a shelf here in the house and she took the color coded items to school today. If everyone has the neat-o trendy cool stuff then she can take them tomorrow.
A lot of it all depends on the teachers and what the teachers want.
My MIL is a 4th grade teacher and tells her kids to get what colors and designs they want, but some of the other teachers are not like that and want certain specific items. Their reasoning is that not everyone can afford the trendy things so it is better to make them all uniform so that no child will be different.
When I was in elementary school, kids had other things on their mind rather than thinking about what brand of school supplies they use. Any crayons, markers, or pencils didn't really matter for the most part. The notebooks and bags on the other hand may be an issue. You could ask the kids what is cool. But most importantly, let them decide for themselves. It doesn't really matter what the other kids think. This would be a good time to learn a life lesson. But if you believe in compromise, ask them what's cool, and let them decide what cool stuff they would like. If all else fails, but them "Unbranded stuff" instead of spongebob shirt. But remember, they're growing up to be big boys and girls, and they'll choose for you.
I choose to buy my kids (5 as well) a bit of both. I get them clothes that they want. We don't buy designer, sometimes they are used or they get them for they birthday but they are usually the style they want. There are a few rules when it comes to the clothes they are allowed to wear, no bellies hanging out, clean, etc. For the most part we are both happy with the clothes. These are the clothes they are seen in. I don't think there is anything wrong with this. My kids don't get new clothes because school is starting. They get new ones when they need them.
School supplies. I think these are less important. At our kid's schools they require specific items. "Crayola" crayons, real wood pencils, "Laurentian" pencil crayons, "Fiskars" scissors, etc. This is a pain, but it does mean all of the kids have the same, "No Name" isn't much cheaper but tend to be more cheaply made. They seem to go through the "No Name" faster, so why bother. I don't think there is any harm in adding their favorites to stuff like back-packs or binders, stuff like that. A Spider-man back pack or Barbie lunch box should be fine in my opinion.
Just went to wal-mart and target and a bunch of other places with my daughter and everyone had a LIST. Every where we went it was packed with parents with lists, Glad I'm over it. My grandson wont wear anything thats not Batman, Spiderman...............You get the picture. Ya'll have fun.
In school there will always be kids who have the lastest "hello kitty" clothes and others that will have the best that Walmart can offer, and others that have the best you can get at Salvation Army or Goodwill.
I have often found that it is the kid thierself that makes or does not make who they are, not the real clothes maker.
Now I am behind the times on what kids do now, but as a father of 5 making low income we often had to buy clothes at the Salvation Army or the GoodWill. I found out some interesting facts, normally they want the jeans faded anyway and will wash new ones 10 times before they wear them to fade them. I have seen kids take sizzors to thier clothes to make great holes before they wear them.
So in that I don't think it really matters, in the US if any one item makes some difference it is the tennis shoes and we tried to find them on sale at the buy one get one 1/2 price or at some of the malls where you could buy 2 get one free or something like that.
Also think stickers, the most plain one dollar note book, with stickers you can make from the internet with sticker paper can make it better than some of the most expensive,
Even store bought stickers, can make that plain notebook or case the best scooby doo notebook.
In the end, you do the best you can, give them the love you can and let it go, You will never have the best, and you will never be the worst but it is the love you put into it that matters and what will be remembered the most.
Thanks so much everyone for your responses. You've given me a lot of great ideas. I'm almost 27, and my experience in lower grade school was a very bad one. I was mocked and teased mercilessly for being a "weirdo" who couldn't afford decent clothes or school supplies. I was still with my biological mother at that point, and we were living on welfare. So I have a personal reason for worrying about this.
Another issue of course is how "competitive" my kids are with each other... they have this uncanny ability to judge when one of them is getting slightly more or better than the other, even if it's totally unintentional. Case in point, yesterday I baked a cake and I had to (from previous experience!) make sure each child had exactly the same size piece, or else they will proclaim it "unfair" that so-and-so got a slightly bigger piece. Anyways my point in saying that, is that if I get branded items for one child, I will have to get them for all the kids. If my niece and nephews get new things, my own will want new things as well, whether they need them or not. Sigh.
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orange agrees: The school my children are attending did specify colours... I will they had as that would simplify matters. I like your idea about the trendy items on a shelf... I may try that!
Janine, I meant to say the school did not specify colours but I wish they had! Ugh I must still be sleepy or something (sort of a constant state with me these days lol!!! Anyways sorry about that, I wish I could edit my comments!!
Anyways, we will be going to Sears and Wal-Mart later on this afternoon. I will keep everyone's suggestions in mind and try to get as much (if not all) of the shopping done in those 2 locations. Wish me luck, as I am going to need it!!
It can work both way Orange, while I did not have alot when my kids were growing up, myself as a child I came from a very wealthy family, I had the best clothes you could get at Sears or Pennys or Famous ( no large malls back then with designer labels) I had that little alligator or pengiun on my shirt, I had the glow in the dark shoe laces. And guess what, I was picked on by classmates as the "nerd" or as the rich kid.
I think grade school is just cruel in general for most kids as they learn to socialze and find that one group will always pick on the other group no matter what
Yes you're absolutely right, Fr Chuck. In grade 7, before boarding school, I was in a class with a boy whose father was a multi-millionaire. He was also mocked. I guess you can't win either way. I have to let go of it, but it's going to be hard for me if any of my kids are mistreated by their classmates!
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