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Home > Family & People > Children   »   Bossy and clingy

 
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Old Nov 25, 2005, 07:30 AM
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nymphetamine
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Bossy and clingy

I have two problems. One my 5 yr old has been stuck to me like a leech ever since i got custody of her and her sister from their father. She will grab hold of my waist no matter what im doing when she sees me and when i ask her to let go she wont no matter what. she even grabs my leg and takes a ride on my foot when i wlk around the house. I have to wake up 5 times in the night to put her back in her own bed because she keeps climbing into mine and thats not wrking. she never did this before and i never started letting her sleep in my bed. she does this on her own. Two , my six yr old acts like she is everyones mama including mine. she will demand that i do something then throw a fit if i dnt. she continues to lie to me even though i have not fallen for one of her lies yet. She does what i say when i tell her to but still trys to be the boss.

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Old Nov 28, 2005, 11:08 AM   #2  
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okay i see everyone likes to look but not answer. Well ive gotten part of my problem fixed. I gave my kids both a necklace to wear and i told them each that they have magic powers that scare away monsters now my five year old doesnt try to sneak in my room anymore. She is however still clingly. My six year old has gotten even more disrepectfull. Just now i got on to my five year old who asked for something three times after i just told her she would have to wait till she ate dinner. My six year old with her smart mouth attitude says " you mean one time." she does that crud all the time. now shes in her bed pitching another fit for being sent to her room. can any one please tell me what can i do? if any one has an answer id appreciate something.
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Old Nov 29, 2005, 10:25 AM   #3  
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Hi, I have the same problem only its not my kids its the kids I work with. They constantly want me to pay attention to them. All of my kids have some type of emotional issues or have been abused, or neglected. I don't know what you can do with the bossy one, but the clingy one might benefit from some mommy and me time. Maybe you could try getting a timer and setting it for maybe five or ten minutes and give her your undivided attention for that period of time. No matter what this will be her time. It may be the time that they spent away from you is having an affect on them, and they want to be sure that you will be there. The kids I work with are older but that works for them sometimes. Hope this is helpful.
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Old Nov 29, 2005, 11:15 AM   #4  
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At those ages, it is normal for a kid to be clingy & hard headed. Is is just a phase
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Old Nov 29, 2005, 05:33 PM   #5  
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Redirection needed

I'm old-school, I do not believe in a sassy child, a child must know his/her place. She has seen this behavior and has adopted it as her own, especially if it yields the results she desire. Negative actions are to be ignored, otherwise, the child will learn that negative attention is better than no attention and pursue the behavior as a means of attainment. Spanking a child only teaches them to hit, especially when angry, frustrated. Therefore, it is is essential to redirect her leadership skills into a more positive atmosphere. She needs to be sternly corrected, to know that the behavior displayed is not appropriate, and will not be tolerated. She is a bright young lady in need of discipline, care and correction. Because she is a leader...help her to develop these skills, she needs an outlet, age appropriate of course. Invest time in your daughter, teach her etiquette, the need to ask for whatever is needed and not to demand, explain to her, why it is essential. Advise her that she needs to be a woman revered and respected. She will understand---teach her how to balance her behavior. As far as Miss Clingy...understand her seperation anxiety...she has experienced loss to the degree that she has internalized it; help her to understand the importance of growth in relationships...that not all relationships will last forever, that relationships have purpose...some endure longer than other...however, life is built on these types of relationships. Like going to the grocery store, the bond with the cashier is brief but essential, get her involved in an activity that allows the creative side in her to flourish; whereby the concentration of her attention will center around achieving, whereby teaching her the glory of gain, so that she spends less time brooding over loss
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