[XM8]

Hi, I'm 16 years old and I just want some help, regarding why my parents treat me like crap. Please take the time to read this and help me as I'm really in trouble and I need help.

My mother is always sticking her nose into my business, and my dad is always.. aggressive. They're not like that all the time, but it does happen quite often and when it does I go mad.
My father says I'm rude and should be punished severely - he means with physical force. My mother is just.. annoying as hell and she will do anything to get what she wants.

I slept at a friends house a 4 days ago, and asked if I could sleep at their house again, yesterday and today and they said no. My mother made a fight telling me to go clean my room. I said fine, but I want to sleep over afterwards and she said "no you don't, you'll be too tired". That's just an example of how ridiculous she is as all I had to clean up were a few books, CDs and wires. I got really pissed off after my dad came in and punched me in the face because I called my mother a clown. I shouted at her that she should stop treating me like a little kid and let me decide things for myself but she won't understand that.

I really need some help, because my mother is so annoying I could shoot her right now. She is living in an imaginary world thinking that I am still a little boy and it p***es me off.

My dad right now is sitting at his study a few rooms away and calling me "bastard" and other things every minute. It gives me aggressiong impules because it's been going on for the past few years and I just feel like breaking something when he does that. Thankfully I don't, but it keeps on getting bottles inside.

Please help me...


XM8

[JudyKayTee]

Hi, I'm 16 years old and I just want some help, regarding why my parents treat me like crap. Please take the time to read this and help me as I'm really in trouble and I need help.

My mother is always sticking her nose into my business, and my dad is always.. agressive. They're not like that all the time, but it does happen quite often and when it does I go mad.
My father says I'm rude and should be punished severely - he means with physical force. My mother is just.. annoying as hell and she will do anything to get what she wants.

I slept at a friends house a 4 days ago, and asked if I could sleep at their house again, yesterday and today and they said no. My mother made a fight telling me to go clean my room. I said fine, but I want to sleep over afterwards and she said "no you don't, you'll be too tired". That's just an example of how ridiculous she is as all I had to clean up were a few books, CDs and wires. I got really pissed off after my dad came in and punched me in the face because I called my mother a clown. I shouted at her that she should stop treating me like a little kid and let me decide things for myself but she won't understand that.

I really need some help, because my mother is so annoying I could shoot her right now. She is living in an imaginary world thinking that I am still a little boy and it p***es me off.

My dad right now is sitting at his study a few rooms away and calling me "bastard" and other things every minute. It gives me aggressiong impules because it's been going on for the past few years and I just feel like breaking something when he does that. Thankfully I don't, but it keeps on getting bottles inside.

Please help me...


XM8

Is there somebody you can talk to - at school, a relative, a parent of a friend? If your father is abusive, having punched you in the face, he can be reported to the local child protective agency.

Unfortunately for you at your age your parents still get to set the rules.

Are you respectful to them?

I find your comment that you could "shoot" your mother "right now" for her meddling to be particularly troubling.

[XM8]

Well.. this friend I have, at whose house I wanted to sleep over. I mean.. he and his mother have been there for me in the past, but I get the impression they're a bit too nosy and I just don't want to talk to them about things like this anymore. Other than that, I have no real friends.

I already reported my dad to the local child protective agency, back in march, and they made him sign a paper saying he can't hit me anymore. My mum had to sign that too...

I'm just not prepared to report them again. This year has been horrible for me. The last 4 months my parents were at war with each other. My dad trying to divorce my mother, and my mother not wanting to part ways.. It was horrible, I just can't go through that bs again.

And to answer your question.. I do get a bit mouthy with my parents, but only after they constantly annoy me with stupid questions.

I wouldn't shoot my mother to be honest.. but she really annoys me - that's all.

[Fr_Chuck]

Let me see you don't get to sleep over anytime you want, you don't just keep your room clean without asking and think you should do anything you want?

Sounds like the question is why are you not respecting your parents and their obligation to watch over you.

How often do they search your room, common in a lot of households.

I beelive you have the issue of all 16 year olds, you think you are grown and don't want people telling you what to do.

[XM8]

It's not that... My mother made me change me room a few days ago. I moved 2 computer desks, a piano, my drumset and my bed. Plus I had to rewire my computer.

She has 2 printers and scanners, that are literally older than me and she keeps telling me to wire them up and they just don't work.

It's excessively boring.. Besides she hasn't cooked anything all day and I'm starving. I'm not saying like "all women should cook and clean" it's just that she says that she does all the house work, but she doesn't really do it. I had 2 cheese sandwiches like 8 hours ago and haven't had anything to eat since except a banana.

"Stop complaing, i'm going shopping - when I get back I'll cook"
The thing is she was on the phone for 2 hours before she left shopping and she's still not back. I'm starving - because there's nothing to eat and cleaning my room. I find this kind of unfair.

I know I'm slacking a bit, but I don't find it necessary for them to degrade me like that all the time. It just.. breaks me. I have no friends, what am I supposed to do?

[spitvenom]

So you don't want to be treated like a kid. But you are complaining that mommy hasn't feed you yet. AHHHH...

[XM8]

Thanks a lot.. Great forums.

[spitvenom]

That is the reaction I wanted to get out of you. Here is what you do get a job then you will have your own money. Don't even discuss it with your parents. Get the job and when they ask you where are you going you say Work. Right there you gain a little bit of leverage because Then you can eat when you want to eat. Don't have to ask mom which in turns starts a fight. Save up money you can get your own place in two years. Then EVERYTHING STOPS!! No more fighting with mom. No more sitting nervous wondering if dad is going to punch you in the face. No more sitting in the next room listening to dad call you names.

[Synnen]

You're ACTING like a child, which is why you're being TREATED like a child.

The fact that you have to be asked to clean your room is silly. If you want to have privileges, you have to take responsibilities.

How often do you clean OTHER areas of the house, without being asked? You live there too!

As far as spending more time with a friend you've already spent a bunch of time with---well, maybe your parents would like you to spend time with THEM, and NOT time arguing with them. It IS almost Christmas, you know.

As far as your parents divorce: That is between them. You have nothing to do with it.

It sounds to me like you should go talk to a school counselor about your feelings. You sound very angry, very bottled up. You need to talk to someone who is professionally trained to help you direct your feelings.

[XM8]

Thanks to both for your answers.

The thing is, I would like to get a job but I don't have any time for that. I go to school and I'm not exactly the best in the class so I really need to study. My parents would get pissed even more if I got a job instead of concentrating more on my school work.

And yea you're pretty right. I must be like a child in front of their eyes but.. I mean I'm just sick of being called names all the time and.. being hit. I'm not a baby or anything, I stopped crying when I got hit when I was about 9 years old. I just can't stand it anymore and it makes ME aggressive - and I hate that because I don't want to become like my dad (in that way).

Keeping this all bottled inside takes a lot of will power and it just wears me down in the end.
I can't tell anyone about it because I don't have any real friends. All my "friends" screwed me one way or another in the past so I just pretend I don't care about having friends anymore. I guess it has it's pros and cons.

Well...

[JudyKayTee]

Thanks to both for your answers.

The thing is, I would like to get a job but I don't have any time for that. I go to school and I'm not exactly the best in the class so I really need to study. My parents would get pissed even more if I got a job instead of concentrating more on my school work.

And yea you're pretty right. I must be like a child infront of their eyes but.. I mean I'm just sick of being called names all the time and.. being hit. I'm not a baby or anything, I stopped crying when I got hit when I was about 9 years old. I just can't stand it anymore and it makes ME agressive - and I hate that because I don't want to become like my dad (in that way).

Keeping this all bottled inside takes a lot of will power and it just wears me down in the end.
I can't tell anyone about it because I don't have any real friends. All my "friends" screwed me one way or another in the past so I just pretend I don't care about having friends anymore. I guess it has it's pros and cons.

Well...

Well, if you have no friends, families or school administrators then you have to call Child Protective Services yourself, report the abuse, they'll take it from there.