This might not be the best place for this, but anyway..

Having gone to a wake on Friday and a funeral on Monday, the topic of funerals reared its ugly head in my household. As of now I have made no provisions for them (personally, I'd prefer to be cremated and kept at home in an urn). My wife and daughter are insisting on having a cemetary to visit. So I suggested to my daughter that she might consider getting a family plot as an anniversary present. She thinks that's an inappropriate present. I think its very appropriate.

Anyone else want to chime in?

tickle

If you are cremated, then your urn can be put in a nitch at the cemetary, therefore, having a place to visit your remains.

My mom died a couple of years ago, her funeral was $l8,000. She had made and paid for her own arrangements several years ago with a plan that gathered interest. So when the tme came, the money was available and her casket had been picked, etc. She didnt want me burdened with the expense as she knew it would be astronomical (and it was). She was a very economical woman, as I, so I know that amount is not the highest paid for a funeral.

Yes, I think your daughter is right, that is an inappropriate request you are making of her. Your decision on burial should be your own expense and your own choice.

My son knows I want to be cremated and my ashes scattered at a place I always enjoyed and visit often; he will respect my wishes, I know that. However, I have money in place to take care of the expenses and he has power of attorney.

Fr_Chuck

Yes, a plot is a wonderful gift as well as a pre=paid funeral arrangements,

The only note I will make on the prepaid funeral is that if you are not that old, it is better to fund it though a funeral insurnace policy, since costs change and funeral homes go out of business.

My dad passed 2 years ago, and he had a "prepaid" funeral, worth 500 dollars he purchased in 1940. Well the average funeral now is about 7500 dollars.

But yes, a family should have a complete written plan wih all details planed out, the funeral home you plan on using should have a copy as well as other famaily members.

Personally I wanted my ashes just put on the grave site ( yes they had to have some place to visit and I did nto want to end up in the closet next to the extra linen either.

ScottGem

Just to clarify, I'm not making any request. The issue came up in discussion and I made a suggestion.

While I agree it should be my own choice, very often it is not your own expense. And I do not see any reason why someone can't help with that expense.

Fr_Chuck

of course Scott don't guess they are planning you needing to use it sooner.

If all of my relations were starting to talk about where to bury me, I may not be sleeping as sound.

ScottGem

LOL. This only came up because we had to attend two funerals over a few days.

oneguyinohio

If the present gives you any comfort, and since you have said you would like it, I don't see anything wrong with asking for it as a present... assuming costs are feasible for the giver...

It would allow the giver to have some input into the place they are more likely to visit than you are in the future...and free you of the tasks... The idea might not seem appealing to them as most people like to put that stuff off

Fr_Chuck

I know my family is having trouble with my last requests, I want to be cremated also, but agreed to a momument, and we settled on an above ground vault. With my urn to be put into my wifes vault. Beyond that I don't want a sad normal funeral, but a celebration of life with a party of sorts. We arranged it all though our attorneys.