im 19 years old, i have a 7month old baby, and pregnant again.

my boyfriend and i live together and he goes to school and works 20 hours a week. he cant work anymore hours for the assistance we are getting so he can go to college.

now, i cant work because we have no one to look after our baby, and i do not trust many to look after him enough. we dont have close realatives either.

now, my parents, whom my father works, but mother is not well enough to care for my child.

together me and boyfirend have a huge credit card debt. i tried to get a debt consolidation loan, and was told i couldnt qualify, and to try again in 6 months. i called all my credit card companies yesterday, and found out that my mastercard account had been suspended. would that be the reason why i didnt get my debt consolidation loan?

should i try going to a place that helps low income familys get out of debt. should i seek credit counselling. i make less than 2000 a year, and my credit card debt is 8700, and my bfs is 2500. he will be getting a grant from the government for 3000 which we will use to pay off my credit, and then he gets osap on top of that. so we will be able to pay off all of my credit card, should we do that or not. im so confused. i cannot go to my parents for any help or advice.

Fr_Chuck

Ok, first you are not married, and your debt is your debt, His grant should be used for his school, not paying off your debts.

First step first, cut up any and every credit card you and he have, You both don't need and should not have credit cards at this point in your life.
You both will get in so deep that before he gets out of school, you will never be able to pay them off.

So, he should esp after not using it any longer be able to make his payments on his card, let him do that.

So you let your cards go into collections, then you can work with a debt settlement company or merley work out min payments to the collection agencies.

So you don't work, even if they sue you and get a judgement, all they can do is attach any bank accounts ( so don't keep any joint money right now, and don't have your name on his bank accounts)
And they can garnish your wages , wich you don't have.

So you basicly pay them alittle as you can, or nothing at all, and let them just try to collect. Then after he graduates, and you learn that you have to trust day care centers and you actually go and get a job , you start paying them

ScottGem

Frankly you need a lot more than credit counseling. That you bought one baby into this situation is bad enough. That you were careless enough to bring a second baby into it, is almost criminal IMHO.

You do need to rip up all your cards and buy only what you can pay cash for. You need to get your head on straight and grow up because you are now responsible for 2 lives (3 if you count the b/f).

hottiex24u

thanks, but dont tell me to grow up. at least im taking care of my children and providing them with everything they need. i was simply asking about how to get around it without touching the money i have in investments. i really dont want to touch the 120, 000 that my grand mother gave me. its for a house.

and all i was asking was is it a RIGHT STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION about going to a credit counselling debt repayment program. dont personally attack my family.

ScottGem

I didn't personally attack your family. I made a valid judgement based on what you told us. I stand by that judgement.

But, you can forget bankruptcy. If you have $120K in investments, you will be forced to use that money to pay off your debts. Now I don't know where you live, but, in most areas, a $120K will go a long way to buying a house. You can easily afford to pay off your credit card debt and still have plenty for a house, especially if the purchase is a couple of years in the future. If you have a lot of late payments on your record, that will inhibit your getting a mortgage. At the least it will mean a higher interest rate. So you will actually save money if you pay off your bills now.

hottiex24u

well i stand by my judgement saying your an arse. but thanks for the advice, i live in canada, so the area where i want to live is really close to my family, the cheapest house is 582000. but id rather not have bills. thanks

CaptainForest

I am from Canada too, so what?

Scott wasn’t being rude, he was being honest.

Wake up and smell the roses.

You have $120,000 and you don’t work at 19?

Take that money and get a university education. Put your child into daycare.

That will be the BEST investment you can make with your money.

And if you are coming on here asking about debt counselling, why the hell are you having a second child when you can't even afford the first.

Why not use birth control?

Have your bf stop by the local health department at his university and he can pick up some free condoms.


As for what you should do:
You are in a mess of a situation.

How much credit card debt do you have?

If it is not hugely insane amount, pay off your credit card debt and NEVER use credit cards again.

Use the money from your grandmother and get yourself an education and put your child in day care.

You also don’t state where in Canada you are living in.

And if you don't want to go to university, it might be better to put your child in day care and get a job yourself.

It is always nice to be a stay at home Mom, but that is a luxury you cannot simply afford right now.

ScottGem

Unfortunately, your judgement is extremely suspect. When one stands behind their judgement it means they have some facts and/or logic to back them up. You have neither. Clearly I put you on the defensive by showing you the cold hard truth of your situation. Your (typical) reaction is to lash out with insults. But that's OK, I can take the heat.

I'll say again that you need to grow up because you are living in a fantasy world. You say you want to move into a neighborhood where homes start over 500K. Even with $120K as a down payment, you will need an income of 6 figures to afford the mortgage. That means you are several years away from that home. Which means that your inheritance will have plenty of time to grow, so you can afford to use 10K to settle your debts.

Also you were the one who said you were a "low income family". So it was clearly irresponsible of you to get pregnant again. All that will do is delay your dream of living near your family.

I'm really not trying to be rude here, but you need a wake up call. If your area of Canada is anything like most areas, there are pockets of towns with varying home prices. I live in an area where most homes are in the $350-$450K range. However, within a 10 minute drive, you can find homes that cost well over half a million. The point being, you can still live near your family and get a more affordable home. But that means learning how to live WITHIN your means. It means, not piling up credit card debt where you can't afford to make the payments. It means not having another child when you can't afford the one you have.

Call me any names you want to, won't bother me. What bothers me is seeing young people mess up their lives by being immature and irresponsible.

Depressed in MO

Well I know all about having babies while being very young (and yes, it IS irresponsible), but you can't live on assistance forever...unless you want to keep having babies over and over again.

I'm not sure about how it works in Canada-however, you are getting all this assistance...medical,etc... I got all that too when I was your age. I also got a free grant to go to any vocational school/college that I wanted. They paid for my daycare, and they paid for gasoline to put into my car to get me back and forth between daycare and school. Even when I started my first "important" job they continued to help me with daycare assistance until I got on my feet.

I was 17 years old. You are 19. You can do it girl and you will feel much better about yourself and your future if you do so. Having a job will not only help eliminate your debt, but it will help you be more prosperous in the future. Please consider making a change.

s2tp

Hottie,

Well you are right to want to get all this settled now, if you continue to have bad credit and not pay these off you will suffer for a very long time. you may end up with such bad credit that you will not be financed for the house you seem to want.

I dont think it is right for you to use your boyfriends grant to pay off your debt. You say you have 120,000 and your debt is around 8700. As much as you dont want to use that money, if your credit continues to be bad, the banks will force it from you.

My best advice is to cut up all existing credit cards, pay the debt you have now and consider it an investment in your future, and for the house you want...

It also sounds to me like you really need to contribute some income for your family.Your BF is trying to go to school, you have 1 kid and another on the way... as hard as it may be to trust someone with your child, I suggest trying to get over that. You dont want to end up broke and boyfriend-less (financial struggles tend to put a lot of stress on couples). have you looked into any at-home jobs, or maybe even working at a daycare center, where you can have your child with you...?

I got caught up in credit cards when I was 19 as well, however I didnt have kids and I was in the US military...either way I got stupid with them and before I knew it i was in over my head. I got smart finally and cut them ALL up, went to a credit union and they hooked me up with a low interest debt consolidation plan on a new credit card. So they paid off all my other credit cards and brought all the totals into one. Not only was it a lot easier to pay, but I wasnt paying interest on 8 different cards either. Another thing that helped me was the fact that I had a car loan with a very high interest I had been paying for 2 years. That had built my credit up, so when I went to the bank to both do the debt consolidation and refinance my car, they were more than happy to help me.
I am now 24, and completely debt free, credit rating in the high 700's and a paid off car...but then I also have a very well-paid job now....

if you dont want to be in debt, then you need to work your way out of it. you should not depend on your BF to do that for you, especially not with his school money, that seems very selfish to me- even if he is happy to do it for you, you should figure out a way to pay it off yourself...120,000 may not go far, but your BF's education money is less $$ but more important at the time being.

I never used a counselor, or debt consolidation company, but I am sure both will be able to help you.