My fiancé asked his parole officer if he could move in with me. He said no. Now they are changing his curfew so we can't see each other. If we get married what will happen?

Like they can violate him and he goes back to jail? WHile he is on parole he does exactly what they say... or they make his life even harder than it is. His option is doing the rest of his time behind bars. Parole is about doing what you are told... exactly when you are told to do it... it teaches responsibility and following rules... and eventually it will be over.

Will they really violate him just for getting married?

I meant married not makes. Will they really violate him just for getting married?

It's their judgement call... he is supposed to get permissions for these sorts of things BEFORE he does them.

THey violate him, Then it goes in front of a judge... and they make the final call...

Its best to say yes sir to them and if they say jump... he says how high.

He wants to appear cooperative. It doesn't last forever.

So there's nothing we can do? The place he lives, the manager is giving him all kinds of problems. My fiancé is following all property rules and paying all his fines. If they change his curfew he can't work. If he can't work he can't pay his rent. He can't pay his rent he gets kicked out. He gets kicked out he has nowhere to go but my house. I have a son to think about. I can't get in trouble or ill loose my son.

What reason did the parole officer give? And how did he make the request?

I'm assuming you don't have a criminal history at all yourself. If you did that would be a valid reason to refuse..

He doesn't approve of him being in a relationship with a female is what was said. I have a felony from 9 years ago spent two weeks in jail then released on probation. No his parole officer doesn't know that. There is nothing stated in his parole that he can't have contact with felons. He was in prison for 20 yrs for unauthorized use of a motor vehicle. He feels the manager is setting him up. The manager has been very spiteful towards him and others that live on the property.

He doesn't approve of him being in a relationship with a female is what was said. I have a felony from 9 years ago spent two weeks in jail then released on probation. No his parole officer doesn't know that. There is nothing stated in his parole that he can't have contact with felons. He was in prison for 20 yrs for unauthorized use of a motor vehicle. He feels the manager is setting him up. The manager has been very spiteful towards him and others that live on the property.

I'm willing to be he does know... because to ask he has to give a name and address... he would check... you have a felony past... that alone legally prevents him for even sharing a house with you.

Yes the PO can run a check on you. And I bet he has already.

It doesn't have to be in his parole papers... its part of the Federal law.

I think there is a lot more to this he isn't telling you. 20 years for unauuthorised use of a motor vehicle... thats less severe that grand theft auto... and people have gotten less time for murder.


Nothing personal... Just that something doesn't add up... I just think you haven't been told the whole truth. I do believe you are telling us what you have been told and led to believe.

You don't know what his PO knows and doesn't know. He probably does know.
Denying contact with felons is standard.
What you need to understand is that parole is nothing more than prison on the outside. His rights are few, and if he tries to complain about anything at all, the PO considers that a good excuse to violate him, whatever the justification. Arguing with the landlord is no different from getting into a fight in prison that you didn't start.
And 20 years IN for auto theft? Um...

I saw all the paperwork. He was supposed to do more but let him out with half time. It's a habitual offender that's why he got so much time. I understand he can't live with me. He doesn't want to be at that property, is there anything he can do?

He zips his lip and keeps going. Maybe he can keep an eye open for a better job further away, and a different place to live closer to that job, and then ask again. Once. Sounds like they'd love to throw him back in.

Hello K:

Its best to say yes sir to them and if they say jump... he says how high.. . it teaches responsibility and following rules... My friend smoothy thinks he works for the cops instead of you. He doesn't get that YOU'RE our client.

He's right about the rules, though... But, he's wrong when he says the PO can MAKE THEM UP as he goes along. Apparently, the WRITTEN rules don't preclude him having a relationship.

Here's what your boyfriend needs to do. The FIRST thing, is he needs to PROTECT himself from retaliation... He DOES that by putting EVERYTHING that happens, down on paper. First, he needs to make a WRITTEN request to move. Have him say that he verbally requested it before and got turned down. Tell him to say that he's requesting a reconsideration, and give the reasons you listed above.

Then send the letter to the PO by CERTIFIED mail, return receipt requested. Send a copy of the letter to the chief PO, the judge, and the prosecutor. If there's a phone call between he and his PO, he should send ANOTHER certified letter to all the parties, recapping the telephone conversation... He should do that with every personal visit too.

Yes, it'll PISS off his PO. What?? He likes your bg NOW?? Screw the PO. THIS is how you get what you want - NOT by laying down for the PO. Don't EVER let him do that.

Excon

PS> To my friend smoothy.. You should have seen this coming. We've been here before. Your advice on this board SUCKS! You help NOBODY!!

Hello again, K:

Read the rules again.. Does it say that he needs permission to move.. I'll bet it DOESN'T..

One time when I was on parole, I didn't need permission to move either. I just had to stay within the state.. I got a job in another county just south of here. I moved and reported to the new PO... He turned out to be such a bastard, that I just picked up and moved back. SCREW HIM!!

excon

Wow this changes everything! He just told me the manager called his po and told him he was huffing glue. My fiancé admired to it in the office. He didn't violate him then but he says he still could. Now what?

Now you find a new boyfriend. This has a snowball's chance in hell.
Maybe excon can help him write lots of letters.
Listen to excon but listen to smoothy too, because excon has the will and the brains to fight and fight and somehow not end up the way half the rest of the ones do.
Admitting to glue is just... what? Confrontational out of desperation? Or plain dumb?

Hello again, K:

The only way a victory can be won is if he has clear conduct. If he can't WIN it, he shouldn't START it.

excon

Does he have a lease where he is now?

Also understand.. he can get in trouble just associating with you because of your past record.

OK... I missed some of the previous posts...

Ex is right... and also hate to say it, but I see a train wreck getting ready to happen in slow motion. Landlord... trying to move in with you, huffing glue... I think his odds of getting violated grow by the day.

Hello K:
My friend smoothy thinks he works for the cops instead of you. He doesn't get that YOU'RE our client.

He's right about the rules, though... But, he's wrong when he says the PO can MAKE THEM UP as he goes along. Apparently, the WRITTEN rules don't preclude him having a relationship.

Here's what your bf needs to do. The FIRST thing, is he needs to PROTECT himself from retaliation... He DOES that by putting EVERYTHING that happens, down on paper. First, he needs to make a WRITTEN request to move. Have him say that he verbally requested it before and got turned down. Tell him to say that he's requesting a reconsideration, and give the reasons you listed above.

Then send the letter to the PO by CERTIFIED mail, return receipt requested. Send a copy of the letter to the chief PO, the judge, and the prosecutor. If there's a phone call between he and his PO, he should send ANOTHER certified letter to all the parties, recapping the telephone conversation... He should do that with every personal visit too.

Yes, it'll PISS off his PO. What??? He likes your bg NOW??? Screw the PO. THIS is how you get what you want - NOT by laying down for the PO. Don't EVER let him do that.

excon

PS> To my friend smoothy.. You should have seen this coming. We've been here before. Your advice on this board SUCKS! You help NOBODY!!!
To my friend ex... the way I've managed to stay out of serious trouble all these years is a lot like how to keep the Heat off your back...

Smile no matter how much you hate them, be cordial with them not matter how much you wish they would fall down the stairs... and keeping a low profile by not antagonizing them... because if you push someone with power over you... they WILL use it to get back at you...

And if nothing else... THAT is a lesson you should have learned in the Army.

You know the old saying... the squeaky wheel gets the grease?

Hello again, smoothy:

THAT is a lesson you should have learned in the Army.Maybe, if I was in the Army.. But, I was in the Navy.. We challenged EVERYTHING.

Excon

Hello again, smoothy:
Maybe, if I was in the Army.. But, I was in the Navy.. We challenged EVERYTHING.

excon

We just see it from opposite directions. I used to fight for everything... then I found a more efficient way to get things done.

A retired Command Army Sgt Major I worked with taught the ropes to me years ago...

I would hope a female with a child would think long and hard on moving in an excon who was a habitual criminal that hasn't shown signs of valuing his chances at a better life by huffing glue while he is on probation. Blaming his problems on a probation officer, and a landlord, and not his own behavior makes him dangerous and disruptive to anyone he latches onto, or latches onto him.

He goes down, you go down. He is headed down, not up.