I slept with the girl and she got pregnant. I did marry her to make things right. We both live out side our countries for studying, any way after marriage things looked ugly, I tried to control myself and be more patient but I really heat every thing about her, but I couldn't do anything about it, because she is very weak so I felt that if I left her I would be the worst man ever. Any way she went back home and start to call and cry to come back, couldn't deal with that so I told her to come back, she stayed her with my son for around a year and she got pregnant again, then she went back home. I went to her country to meet her parents and she how the life of my children and to meet my baby, situation was bad, I start to think to ask to take the childern but she didn't even let me think about it, she immediately made me swear that I will never ask her for the kids.
Now I am back home and she start to call again asking to come back because she doesn't feel good in her house, I don't want to do the same mistake. We never had one good day when we were together its because of me feeling nothing for her. My days are bad full with guilt for my children.I want them back but not with her.

You obviously had at least one good day with her twice. See a lawyer about what your custody would be like in your country. You then can make a better decision.