my wife had me served divorce papers less than a year ago , a week later we were back together and she called the court and they said they can be put on hold and i agreed , ok we split up a week ago and she said she signed divorce papers and i will get divorce papers in the mail and since i never responded the first time that i had defaulted and she will get everything, we already started making up but i need some help

Does not work that way, she is just playing you, time to get an attorney even if you meet together.

... she said ... since i never responded the first time that i had defaulted ...

Check with the clerk of court tomorrow morning and see if a default was entered. In most places that I know of, the plaintiff (your wife) would have to ask the clerk of court to enter a default; it doesn't happen automatically.