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View Full Version : In the state of Texas, at what age can you live with an older sibling?


Monica4
Aug 11, 2010, 02:47 PM
My name is Monica. I'm 16, will be 17 in January. My mother gave up my younger brother and I to my father due to a drug related problem. I've been living here for years. I maintain a B+ - A average in school, I participate in school activities, and I live with my Dad, Stepmother, younger brother, and stepbrother. I'm the oldest of the three, but I get no attention and I've been treated like a slave. My father doesn't refer to me as a daughter and I can't live here. I don't want to work out the problem, I just want to leave. I talked to my sister about it and she explained that in the past, my dad signed a form giving her the right to watch over us. I'm considering it, but I'm not sure about the age requirements to make decisions like that in Texas is. She's 25, lives with two children, has a job, and is reliable of taking care of me. Please help me by answering me so I can either A) pack and go. Or B) participate in more activities to avoid being home. Thank you.

cdad
Aug 11, 2010, 03:10 PM
B) until such a time as your father agrees to it. Your too young to just leave. For you to move out you must be 18 first.

ScottGem
Aug 11, 2010, 03:41 PM
As noted, until you are 18 you are under the control of your parent.

The form your dad signed has no bearing here. A minor (under 18) cannot choose where to live.

Monica4
Aug 12, 2010, 11:18 AM
As noted, until you are 18 you are under the control of your parent.

The form your dad signed has no bearing here. A minor (under 18) cannot choose where to live.

But if my mom hadn't give up my brother and I, I'd have a say so with where I wanted to live. My brother wanted to stay with my mom and the court let him (he was also under my mother's custody) but my dad wanted him so he fought for him and the courts passed him on to us. So what if I don't want to stay, the way my brother didn't want to, but my sister fought for me, the way my father did? Wouldn't that be the same thing?

ScottGem
Aug 12, 2010, 11:35 AM
It doesn't matter that your mom gave you up to your father. Until you are 18 you cannot just choose. Custody is determined by a court. The person who wants custody has to petition the court for a modification of the custody order. The judge will listen to your preference but make the decision based on several factors.

The thing is, its one thing when the parents are asking for custody. Its another when its your sister.

Monica4
Aug 12, 2010, 11:49 AM
It doesn't matter that your mom gave you up to your father. Until you are 18 you cannot just choose. Custody is determined by a court. The person who wants custody has to petition the court for a modification of the custody order. The judge will listen to your preference but make the decision based on several factors.

The thing is, its one thing when the parents are asking for custody. Its another when its your sister.

Okay so what if I talk to my father about living with my sister? What if I say I want to live with her because of school opportunities, and he agrees? I want my sister to be my guardian. Would it be better if I did that?

cdad
Aug 12, 2010, 12:44 PM
If your father agrees to it then yes you can move. But guardianship is temporary. So any mess ups along the way and it can be revoked.

ScottGem
Aug 12, 2010, 01:03 PM
As long as dad agrees it shouldn't be a problem.

Monica4
Aug 12, 2010, 04:55 PM
What if there was abuse? There has been in the past. Can the court still make me stay with him?

ScottGem
Aug 12, 2010, 04:59 PM
what if there was abuse? there has been in the past. can the court still make me stay with him?

Is there a record of it? Did you call the police, report it to cps? Do you really want to do that your father?

Monica4
Aug 12, 2010, 05:59 PM
Is there a record of it? Did you call the police, report it to cps? Do you really want to do that your father?

There's a record from 3rd, 6th, and 7th grade. And yes, I would love to do that to my father. Especially my stepmother. I literally hate them. They deserve worse. I just want to live with my sister and I'm trying to do all I can to make it happen. But as long as my sister wants me with her and fights for me, this can work? I'm trying to leave before the 23rd because that's when school starts.

cdad
Aug 12, 2010, 06:02 PM
there's a record from 3rd, 6th, and 7th grade. and yes, I would love to do that to my father. especially my stepmother. I literally hate them. they deserve worse. I just want to live with my sister and I'm trying to do all i can to make it happen. but as long as my sister wants me with her and fights for me, this can work? I'm trying to leave before the 23rd because that's when school starts.

If they are already aware of the abuse and your still with him then nothing is going to change at this time. Otherwise it would have already.

Monica4
Aug 12, 2010, 06:22 PM
If they are already aware of the abuse and your still with him then nothing is going to change at this time. Otherwise it would have already.

But I'm with my dad by choice, doesn't that mean something?

ScottGem
Aug 12, 2010, 06:23 PM
You only think you are with him by choice. You have no choice in the matter.

Monica4
Aug 12, 2010, 10:24 PM
You only think you are with him by choice. You have no choice in the matter.

But if my mom fixes herself, I can go back. So it technically is a choice

ScottGem
Aug 13, 2010, 03:30 AM
You came here asking for advice. You have been given the correct advice for your situation. I don't know why you keep arguing with the advices you were given.

I don't know what the custody order says, but I doubt very much if you were given the choice. It probably says that is she "fixes" herself, she can reapply to have custody returned to her. But I doubt very much if they allowed a child to judge whether she has fixed herself or not.

Fr_Chuck
Aug 13, 2010, 05:14 AM
Your mom would have to fix herself and file to regain custdoy in in court, and prove to the court that she is fit to have you. Normally she will have to prove she has went to treatment programs for a period and do random drug tests over periods. Even then the courts may not allow you back there.

Until you are 18 you have no personal ability to make a choice, you can testify in court to what you want.

You do not like the advice given but you have been told by some very well informed people of what is going on.

Monica4
Aug 13, 2010, 08:22 AM
You came here asking for advice. You have been given the correct advice for your situation. I don't know why you keep arguing iwth the advices you were given.

I don't know what the custody order says, but I doubt very much if you were given the choice. It probably says that is she "fixes" herself, she can reapply to have custody returned to her. But I doubt very much if they allowed a child to judge whether she has fixed herself or not.

I was not arguing. I was simply just making sure ALL of my questions get answered. I wouldn't like to be asking separate questions all relating to the same topic.

ScottGem
Aug 13, 2010, 08:26 AM
But your question were answered. You kept throwing new info at us that didn't change the answer.