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sawyerkim
Oct 9, 2008, 07:50 AM
i have been with my byfriend for six months and after two months we moved in togther when i first moved in we had sex verynight the sex life was great that leasted about a month or so and then we started having it less and less and now im lucky if we have it once a week hes never in the mood so this week i was on his laptop and saw that he has been on porn sites lots i then asked him about it that day and i was the bad guy for asking he told me its because he hurts and hes tired so when hes too tired to have sex with me ir he hurts he looks at porn and that upsets me why does he need porn hes with me and i am always welling to please him i am so confussed becuse i love him but when i think of him wacthing it it makes me sick to my stomach and i get angry help

Neilcathy67
Oct 9, 2008, 08:28 AM
You do not say how old you are, but I will assume that you are young and the thrill is gone for him. Men need motivation and it would behove you to try new things with him, role playing toys etc. Variety is the spice of life and you need to keep the flame burning. Imageine 15 years later and how couples keep it going?

missingpieces
Oct 13, 2008, 04:48 PM
I have been here with my boyfriend. Basically talking about it in an open way is good, questioning it and asking why not me will make him run away from the situation, trust me, ive been there! I hate it when guys come on and say the thrill is gone, you've only been together for 6 months and it is a very stressful time for everyone right now. Here's how my guy put it and i have a feeling it might be the same for you: When he is sore and tired (oh Ive heard those plenty of times) it is just stress relief for him and it takes so much energy to please us. One way I got a little closer to him was offering bjs (not all girls like to do that tho so if its not your thing dont worry about it). Another thing is just talk to him and try to find the root of his issues without talking about sex or porn. What's going on with him if he is really hurting or tired? When he can't come up with an answer to those then it is time for him to open up if he has an addiction.

The other part of this is guys like porn. It is just always going to be that way and there is not much we can do about it. Try to watch a little yourself and see if you like it. Another way I got my bf to open up is by watching it together and it made him realize how much better it is to be with me.

I hope this helps.