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View Full Version : I like someone a lot younger than me.is that wrong?


mik2007
Feb 4, 2008, 10:17 PM
Hey everyone, I have recently met a great girl at work and have been talking to pretty much everyday. I see her at work, talk to her online and on the phone, text message and even hung out last Friday. She is an amazing person and I feel that we have met each other for a reason since recently I have gone through some crazy heartbreak and sort of still am going through. She knows about what happened with me and my ex and is always telling me that she wants to be the one to make it all go away. We flirt a lot and she knows that I like her and its obvious that she likes me but there is something that I don't know is a huge problem or even a problem at all but I had to get some opinions about it.

You see I am 23 turning 24 this April and she is 18 not turning 19 until October. I don't know why this would be a problem but could such an age difference be a problem? Or does it really matter? We like all the same things and she is really fun to hang out with but I can't help but feel strange about it. My ex just recently got engaged to a guy who is 7 years older than her (she is 22 and he is 29) after only dating for 4 months. So I don't know if my situation is like that one at all. Any suggestions or opinions would be very helpful!!

oneguyinohio
Feb 4, 2008, 10:25 PM
Nothing wrong with going into things slowly. Give yourselves time to see if the age difference creates any problems as far as your life styles or choices. It would depend on the personal styles that each of you have.

No one is going to make you rush into anything. Get to know each other. You don't have that much of an age difference. It would more revolve around your interest and treatment toward one another.

justcurious55
Feb 4, 2008, 11:53 PM
That's not really much of an age gap. I agree with oneguy, don't rush into things. She might still be too young to want anything too serious. But you're young too, it's not like you need to rush into being engaged or married either.

ISneezeFunny
Feb 5, 2008, 12:17 AM
Age gap... well, from HER point of view, it could be pretty huge. If you think about it, she's a freshmen in college (if she's going) and you're somewhere 2 years after graduating college. So, is it large? Ehhh... is it disgusting/awkward? No, not really.

The only thing I could possibly see going wrong here would be her maturity level and as justcurious55 said, her willingness to commit.

Good luck.

engrce
Feb 5, 2008, 12:23 AM
My Dad is 21 years older than my mom, they lasted 20 years. You'll be fine.

imation
Feb 5, 2008, 05:44 AM
Age is a lessening problem as you get older, 5 years difference means a lot at 50/55 but 5 years means everything when it comes to 15/20. Because she is still in the 18yr old party hard time of her life it might be harder because your most likely settling out of that, the relationship could potentially have a lot of problems but who knows, it'll be fun, and an expirience

EuRa
Feb 5, 2008, 07:59 AM
I wouldn't worry about the age difference too much. There's a few things I'd look out for:

1) Didn't you say she just got out of a relationship? Didn't you as well? You could both be just rebounds for each other, so watch out.

2) She might hold you to a higher degree just because you're older. I was 22 and a girl I dated was 18, she "LOVED" me, but years later admitted that the only thing she was attracted to was my age. I could buy alcohol. :P

3) A person changes the most in their lives betweent he ages of 16 and 26. She's still changing, you're almost done. She might turn into a totally different person, or she might be doing that now, and you're almost done becoming who you are. Just be careful.

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All in all, I think it's OK on your end. As long as you know what problems may arise, you'll be more prepared if that ever happened.

mik2007
Feb 5, 2008, 03:02 PM
Well after getting to know her she is very mature for her age. She doesn't go out much but when she does she does party like anyone else would at that age. I am at the point in my life where going out to the bars and everything isn't that big of a deal anymore. I still like going but its not that important anymore. But I do understand what everyone is saying about the both of us changing. With me getting my heartbroken I can honestly say that I am looking to fill the void. She has had two major relationships but for her age right now she is still young and doesn't yet know what she wants in life.

What I am most concerned about is that getting into a relationship quickly, I feel like I could damage it cause I am still not completely healed over everything. And because my heart got broken I really don't want to go through that again with someone new. I am just not sure how I can go about all of this and how it will work out.

talaniman
Feb 5, 2008, 05:13 PM
What I am most concerned about is that getting into a relationship quickly, I feel like I could damage it cause I am still not completely healed over everything. And because my heart got broken I really don't want to go through that again with someone new. I am just not sure how I can go about all of this and how it will work out.

I think you looking at this the right way, as the potential for a rebound relationship is great here, and the age difference is not the big problem, but are you both emotionally ready for a relationship, or not.

Hey everyone, I have recently met a great girl at work and have been talking to pretty much everyday.
The fact you work together is the biggest challenge I see, as work is not the place to try to build a relationship between fragile people. Having said that, as long as you are realistic in your expectations, and go into it with your eyes open, with a lot of maturity, and caution, then I wish you luck at whatever choice you make.

carly381
Feb 8, 2008, 10:28 AM
I Say Just Go For It... Age Shouldn't Hold You Back From Doing Anything That You Want To Do... If You Like Her And She Likes You Then try Things Or At least Tell Her Upfront That You like Her But Are Worried About The Age Difference.

He_comes_with_baggage
Feb 10, 2008, 07:42 PM
There's nothing wronge with dating an 18 year old. My friend is 24 an dating an 18 year old an I don't hate her she's just a little to immature for me but then I got to remember OK that's because she 18. An I mean when she turns 21 you got to watch out. She might go crazy an go bar hoping. I don't know Everyone's different though hope it works out