Hi, me and this girl, amanda who I happen to really like went on a date Sunday night and we had a great time. For out 2nd date she wants to go out this Tuesday and I don't know if it's a good idea cause its pretty close to our first date.


I don't want to say the wrong thing because I really like this girl and she told me that she really likes me to and that she wants me as her boyfriend A.S.A.P.


Any answer will be thanked!!

By the way, I'm 15 and she is 14 and were both freshman in high school.

Are you still on winter break the rest of this week? Tuesday IS New Year's Day. Is there a movie you two might want to see (and fight the crowds), or maybe just spend time at someone's house and watch a DVD and eat microwaved popcorn? Otherwise, certainly she could wait for the weekend. Two days between dates is pushing it a little. You'll get tired of each other after the first week! Tell her you want to savor the first date for a few more days.

My personal advice is to slow down. It seems like you are both eager to be in this relationship with each other. Since you said it was "close" to the first date, that seems like you might feel that things are going too fast. It's never wrong to listen to yourself.

I would spend some more time getting to know her, and try to figure out a schedule you are both comfortable with.

Let me ask you "What do you consider the purpose of dating to be at your age?"

Is it to find a lifetime partner? Well, I'll let you tell me...

Relax a little, you guys already had a first date... I think the second should come up like not forced. Like let things go naturally... maybe if you see her somewhere or something, you could ask her to go out... otherwise I think you guys might end up overwhelming each other too soon. Sometimes time and patience are your best friends.

Dang dude.. I glad that you had a great time...

And second date already?. isnt it a little bit too fast.. .

But it OK... as long as you feel comfertable about it then it OK... but if you don't feel so... tell her that you want the date like next week or something... you don't want to rush things

I really like her and all but the it's a little to quick for me, and in my opinion, I only want to be in a relationship because its someone that you can trust with everything, tell anything to, spend time with, have fun around by being yourself and not having to fake anything, and its someone who likes you for who you are.

And yes I am still on winter break for the rest of this week

I do agree with the others above that to go out on a "date" so soon after the first one is probably not a good idea. However, it is winter break. Maybe there is an activity that you could do as a group with some of your buds while you have the time since you have this break from school?

Where I live, there is a lot of snow. Do you have snow where you are? If you do have snow, then maybe you could organize a sledding or even ice skating party?

If you don't have snow, then this is still a good time to organize some sort of group activity. You could have fun with Amanda and also others, without making it so much like you are on a date. Doing things like that helps to slow things down as far as yours being a serious relationship too soon.

Nah, sadly there's no snow in Florida, haha man do I hate it here I would love to be in New York but that's not going to happen for a long time. Most of my friends are away on vacation and don't get back till like the 3rd or 4th

Tell her you want to savor the first date for a few more days.

Thanks for that one, I told her that I wanted to savor the first date and that we were moving a bit fast for me and thankfully she understood. Thanks!

Thanks for that one, i told her that i wanted to savor the first date and that we were moving a bit fast for me and thankfully she understood. thanks!!

Females just LOVE it when their men tell them that they want to savor something! Men must learn that we females are big on emotional stuff and want to hear them buy into that too.

I'm glad it worked! (I bet she is sitting down right now staring out the window and dreamily thinking, "Oh, my! He's SAVORing our being together! Ooooooooooohhhhhhhhh! I really like him a lot.")

Haha I hope so to, she tells me that she really likes me every once in a while and its nice to hear cause I say it right back! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!

I i only want to be in a relationship because its someone that you can trust with everything, tell anything to, spend time with, have fun around by being yourself and not having to fake anything, and its someone who likes you for who you are.

I appreciate your answer tremendously! I will keep that in mind as my son grows a little older... right now he is 10 and dating is not something he wants to do... He clearly says when he is older...

Anyway, my brother's philosophy with his 7 kids is that the purpose of dating is to find a life time partner, and if they are not ready to make that kind of commitment, then they don't have a reason to date. I was kind of hesitant to accept that philosophy, and now with your answer, I know why.

Enjoy, and have a great new year!

In my opinion the purpose of dating is really to have fun and find the kind of person you like to be around. Maybe you like someone funny, someone serious, someone tall, someone short, maybe someone with experience, maybe without experience. I'm only 15 so I don't have much on this subject, I just know that everyone has a different opinion on it.

Have a great new year too.

I also have a question, when is a good time to go for the first kiss?

First kiss: You've walked her to her front door. The two of you have been chatting about the movie and about the fun you've had. She thanks you for a nice time. You chuckle and tell her the pleasure was all yours. She smiles. The conversation stops. She looks down at her feet. You put your fingers under her chin and gently raise her face so she is looking at you. You tell her how lovely she is. She sighs softly and closes her eyes. You move your hand so it briefly caresses the side of her face then immediately move your hand to the middle of her back, pulling her upper body a bit forward as you lean over to lightly brush her closed lips with yours.

The rest is up to you.

And that would be about the time the porch light comes on, she slaps you, her dad loads his shotgun, and the entire high school jumps up from behind the bushes to see if you wet yourself...

Just kidding, and good luck.

I would love to do that but I can't. I'm only 15 and don't have a license and don't receive one for another year. Plus, I don't need my dad to see me do that. Especially cause when I get back to the car he's going to be annoying me about it the whole way home. Is there another time that would work?

Will you ever be alone with her?

First kiss: You've walked her to her front door. The two of you have been chatting about the movie and about the fun you've had. She thanks you for a nice time. You chuckle and tell her the pleasure was all yours. She smiles. The conversation stops. She looks down at her feet. You put your fingers under her chin and gently raise her face so she is looking at you. You tell her how lovely she is. She sighs softly and closes her eyes. You move your hand so it briefly caresses the side of her face then immediately move your hand to the middle of her back, pulling her upper body a bit forward as you lean over to lightly brush her closed lips with yours.

The rest is up to you.
Really sounds like the classic movie/soap opera. Very ideal but unfortunately doesn't happen too often. In my opinion a first kiss should be when you guys know each other better... it should be when you are already dying to give one or ready to... and spontaneous not planned. It's something that should just come right at the moment. Something mutual. But that's just my opinion.

Really sounds like the classic movie/soap opera. Very ideal but unfortunately doesn't happen too often.

That was pretty much how my first kiss went. I can still feel it a thousand years later.

Go ahead. I really don't see where you have anything to lose.

I don't know when we will be, if we hang out at her house the door will always be open, and at my house the door will only be open if my mom is home because my dad trusts me.

What makes it a strange statement? I'm not saying this in a mean way at all, I'm just curious.

If you mean strange in a way that she just wants sex or something, I'm not into that at this age, don't get me wrong I want to do it, but doing it at this age is just plain stupid because there's a 5% chance that a condom won't work and that 5% could happen to you at anytime and that means that you just screwed up your life at a very young age

If you mean strange in a way that she just wants sex or something, im not into that at this age, dont get me wrong i want to do it, but doing it at this age is just plain stupid because theres a 5% chance that a condom wont work and that 5% could happen to you at anytime and that means that you just screwed up your life at a very young age


I don't really mean she wants sex. There's probably nothing wrong with it considering her age. It's just strange to me 'cause no way in heck would I ever say that or even think it just from a first date. Maybe it's just my old age and my tendency to be suspicious of people. Just forget I said that, it was a stupid thought.

Haha OK, it really wasn't a stupid thought. A lot of people think like that. Everyone has there own opinion on certain things.

If you mean strange in a way that she just wants sex or something, im not into that at this age, dont get me wrong i want to do it, but doing it at this age is just plain stupid because theres a 5% chance that a condom wont work and that 5% could happen to you at anytime and that means that you just screwed up your life at a very young age

You sound like a person who thinks things out carefully and thoughtfully. I commend you for wanting to wait. As far as the kiss, one of the kisses I received that has stayed with me was when I was 15, went out with a guy two years older so was nervous. It was a group party in the evening outside. I did not kiss guys on the first date because to me a kiss was so special. Toward the end of the evening, he was just holding my hand and kissed me on the cheek. We ended up dating for almost four years, never did consummate the love because of my convictions to wait until marriage but sure enjoyed the holding, kissing and such. He was respectful of that even though he wanted to go further.

The sensuality of the kiss has been done away with it seems with relationships moving so fast. To me there is nothing so sensual as a time when you feel the breath of the one you care about on your cheek as he leans in and gently touches his lips to yours in a sweet and caring kiss, gentle but firm, pulling you toward him. "Airbrused kisses" as I like to call them where the lips barely touch for a bit then end in a sweet deep kiss are remembered long after for me. There is plenty of time for the passioate kissing that moves into another area.

Best of luck as you continue to make good choices for your life. :)

Thanks

Were going to the beach when it starts to get dark out. I can't wait for us to have some alone time to just talk and be together. I really like this girl and I want to be with her for a long time. I want to make the first kiss memorable but I don't even know how to kiss.

Tomorrow we are going*

So instead of the beach we are going to go bowling, but we have no idea what to do afterwards.

Any suggestions?

Go somewhere to eat? To get ice cream? To a big mall?

Well she asked if I wanted to go to a fire that were parents and grandpa and cousins and sister are going to be at and I don't know if I should


I want to spend time with her but I don't know if I'm ready to spend time with her and her family, and plus I'm a really shy person

A fire?

Like bon fire

You sound like a very fun person. Go to the fire and print in black marker and wear a name tag that's says "I'm shy - be gentle" with a smiley face on it or some such thing. Her family will think you are so cute and adorable.

Seriously? Haha I will so do that

I'm nervous about being asked questions by her dad. Do you know any questions that are commonly asked?

Lemmee see --

"How's school?"
"What classes do you have?"
"Have you thought about what you want to do after high school?"
"Do you have any pets?"
"What's your favorite sport?"
"What's your favorite team?"
'Who's your favorite player?"
"What's your favorite make and model of car?"
"Who would you vote for for president if you could vote?" (tricky one)
"Are you planning to marry my daughter?"

Here's a fabuous site I just came across a few minutes ago. It helps with all sorts of questions and problems in relationships and dating including how to unhook a bra one-handed --

Relationships how to articles from wikiHow (http://www.wikihow.com/Category:Relationships)

Here are a few "meeting her father" pointers from that site --

- Smile a lot and laugh at jokes that are told. Ask the father questions and engage him in conversation. People love to talk about themselves, so act interested in what he has to say! Also, ask questions about your girlfriend. Fathers are proud and love to see that their children are admired and cared for. Do not dominate the conversation entirely. Talk about yourself, but make sure it is a two-way conversation. You are learning about each other.

- Speak respectfully of your own parents and family when discussing them. It shows that you have respect for your elders and that you maintain a loving relationship with them.

- Keep your cool. If the father's personality clashes with yours and you dislike being around him, don't forget that he raised the girl you love and grin and bear it. If your relationship lasts, he will always be a part of your life. Be as polite as possible.

- Thank him (and the mom) verbally after the party or dinner or picnic or get-together and send a thank you note by mail when you get home. People love getting thank you notes; it is a thoughtful gesture.

- After the meeting, make sure to tell him that it was a pleasure meeting him and you look forward to seeing him again in the future!

Thanks a lot!

There's always the father's question of... What are your intentions with my daughter?

And...

Have you heard about my gun collection?

Lol... have you ever meet the parents that the dad is a pilot gunner in marien and the mom is marien retired?? And they both met and married in the marien ?

Lol... that was crazy.. T_T >.. hahaha

They like... " you no that we still have something left behind from the marien , i would love to show you that if you messed with my daughter "...

I was like " no sir ...no sir... i'll treat her goood.".. they were like " how good " T_T man that was horrible T_T

That stinks

Must of stinked*

Must have stunk**

(irregular verb)

Well, so we went out last night to the bowling alley and then walked to the mall and walked around inside the mall and then we came back to my house and watched 2 movies in my room and she was laying her head on my shoulder and it felt really comforting and we had a lot of fun. But I missed like 30 chances to kiss her cause I was to nervous.

lol... well did you at least ? ^_^

No, I'm so nervous to, I had chances tonight also but I'm so nervous over it. I hugged her a lot and we held hands for like an hour so she knows I care about her, I'm just really nervous

Lol... well first kiss?. if then yeah... wait till you ready.. XD...

Don't worry so much about the kissing. You're thinking about it way too much... maybe she is liking the fact that you aren't trying to kiss her all the time... just have fun and what will happen, will happen. Stop trying to plan the moment.

Oneguy, this is great advice. Tried to rate answer but it said I had to spread the love around a bit first. LOL

Fun time in your life Sch!! As I have said before, "Enjoy the journey!" You will know when the time is right. I know that sounds like a cliché but it is really how it is.

OK, all of you give great advice!

I do think about it a lot, probably a little to much(as Oneguy stated)

And yes, it would be my first kiss

It will happen don't worry, just like the first date, savior it.

Thanks, she's coming by today for a couple hours... I want it to happen tonight, but if it doesn't it doesn't... theres always another time and another place

So it didn't happen 2 days ago, and I had plenty of chances, but I didn't act on them.

I can't wait for our next date because I'm definitely going to do it then.

so you got your first kiss ? >>^^...

No, I haven't yet. I feel so bad today, I have weight training after school on Mondays and Wednesdays and then I have a Math and Spanish tutor and today I had weight training. So after school I saw her in the hallway and I said hi and she said hey. But I had to leave right away and I couldn't stand around to tell her anything. So I just left for the weight room. I feel so bad because I know that all I needed was a minute to tell her that I couldn't talk, but I didn't have the time. And I texted her before the weight training to tell her that I'm sorry and she said Oh. Its OK. I understand. But I don't know if she really does understand?? I don't want to hurt her or make her mad.

Better text her again!! :) Sometimes, it takes a gal more than being told once. We tend to be skeptical. LOL

I've told her that I'm sorry about 5 times already. I just don't know if she really isn't mad. We've only been together a week, its not like I know her emotions inside and out. I feel so bad because there was 10 minutes before they opened the weight rooms door. And for at least 6 of those 10 minutes I could have talked to her

Easy playa, your thinking way too much, settle down and just be yourself. She will understand.

Okay, thanks Tal

I'm starting to wonder about something you told me earlier in this thread...

I only want to be in a relationship because its someone that you can trust with everything, tell anything to, spend time with, have fun around by being yourself and not having to fake anything, and its someone who likes you for who you are.

Now you seem to be putting an awful lot of thought into the kissing and romantic end of things. You seem to be worried an awful lot about how to act, or what to say, when you initially said: "its someone who likes you for who you are." That sounds more like a very good friend---without the desires you're now adding on.

What's the big rush to have all these experiences? Just to have them? For what purpose? What comes next? When it isn't all new anymore? I am really thinking that you are jumping in too quickly. Somebody is apt to get hurt in this situation since there is no real plan for where things can lead other than a lot of experimenting. Consider cooling your jets for awhile. Realistically, you are young. You can not support yourself, and you sure are not in a position to be thinking about a grown up long-term committed exclusive lifelong relationship.

That is very true, I have been looking into a bit too much for me. I just want to experience it really bad, and I know it can wait, It had just gotten the best of me

Call it what it is, Raging Hormones, typical at your age, the dreams, the feelings, the scent of her hair, the feel of her touch, we all go through it, male and female, just use your common sense, and don't get in trouble.

I don't plan on getting into any trouble... But must of us say that and guess what? We get in trouble.

Anyone know how to make a relationship less expensive?

I had $80 before we started going out, and after 3 dates I have $20 left.

Rent movies, and play games, walk and talk.

Good suggestions

Thanks tal

So, we kissed tonight, it was only a 1 second peck...

And her mom wants me to have dinner with them tomorrow night

Go to the park, hike, hike, hike... read a book, watch TV, go to church together maybe? do a hobby together, push her on a swing, ride a bike, play board games, cards, wash a car together, make a pizza at home... help her do a chore at home?

Money can't buy love... lesson#1...

When I was your age, I put off asking anyone out because I thought I needed to have a car and money... Now that I'm my age (40+), I still tend to use the same excuse of maybe when I have more $, though I know it won't matter with the right person.

Hey Sch, sounds great! "Congratulations"! If the mom is wanting to have you over for dinner, that is a plus. She must be happy you and her daughter are seeing each other. You have taken it slow and that is great. It has been a pleasure seeing how this has unfolded in your life. Thanks for sharing! Best to you! :)

I could go to church with her, but I'm jewish so It would be kind of awkward. Haha.

We went to the park last night and had a lot of fun. We lied there looking at the stars and kissed a couple times, fun night.

Thanks for all of the suggestions!!

Going to church with her sounds nice. It is always good to learn about what a friend believes in their faith walk and why.

Enjoy and just stay respectful of her and of yourself. Sounds to me like you do think things through. I am happy for you.

Sounds like a good idea

Ok ummmm...

I know I'm only 15 and I can't possibly be in love with a girl that I've been dating for almost 3 weeks, but how can I express my feelings to her? It's like I really want to say "I love you", but then, wouldn't I just be lying? I'm really confused...

You wouldn't be lying by telling her that you love her. It would just be that you would be telling her that you love her, based upon your understanding of what love is for you at this point in your life. You will understand and grow in the understanding as to what true love is about as you get older and have more experiences in life.

Very true, thanks for the advice Clough. I'll definitely take that into consideration.

When would be a good time to tell her how I feel, I know that I liker her and that she likes me, but I feel more than that. How would I be able to express it?

Find your own way. Do what you feel is right in your heart.

You don't always have to get your answers from other people. Let your authentic self do the actions. Otherwise, you are just a mirror of others.

Do you want this girl to like you, or the thoughts of others?

Just a thought: There is a difference in loving someone and being "In Love" with someone. You can love on many levels with out the other person feeling things are moving too fast. A person may be "In Love" but this is such a deeper kind of love, one might take their time before sharing with the person those feelings. Intense feelings shared too soon can be a little intimidating to a young girl. One might share at some point, "I really do like you. I even feel at times I am beginning to love you."
Schw, I am in no way saying this is what to say!! Just remembering back some years!! LOL :)

Oneguy has given you some really great advice in saying to find your own way.
Each of us has to and each of us makes good choices along the way and mistakes along the way and learn from them. As long as you are being sincere in what you say and how you say it, the girl will generally accept what you say but might not be able to voice the same at that given moment so if that happens, don't be disheartened or feel embarrassed. Putting your feelings out there is a scary thing. One might let things proceed at a safe pace until one feels a comfort in their heart to share.

I know it helps to have some feed back from others but you do need to learn to listen to your heart to know when timing is right for each step. You waited to kiss her until you felt it was right and it turned out great.

One thing I have learned in life is that if I feel an urgency to say something or do something, that is generally the time I wait. When I have peace to say or do something, then I feel comfortable in doing so.

Sharing here and asking these questions is a good and positive thing. You do probably need to begin depending on the direction you feel from our heart more each day and feel less dependent on this safety zone on the forum but any of us out here are happy to answer or discuss issues with you. As Oneguy said, "Let your authentic self do the actions." Great advice.

That was great advice, thanks a lot! This is a very confusing subject for me and probably many others. I'm grateful for your advice.

So I told her how I felt and she told me the same, but for some reason it feels weird to say it. Of course this girl is great and I would love to be with her for a while, but for some reason it feels weird to say "love" at times. I'm guessing I'm just not used to it, but I don't know if that's entirely true.

The intense feelings are love in a way, young love. You will also feel a lot of intense emotions, and think its love because for now it will hurt so good. We all go through this awakening process, so have fun with it. It won't always be fun and games.

Yea, I'm thinking its feelings weird because even though my ex and I are over 1000 miles away from each other I still said "love" to her ans she meant the world to me and then she cheated on me and it hurt a lot. I got up the courage to say it to my girlfriend now and I'm happy I did, I just don't like the wierdness

Hi, me and this girl, amanda who i happen to really like went on a date sunday night and we had a great time. For out 2nd date she wants to go out this tuesday and i dont know if its a good idea cause its pretty close to our first date.


I dont want to say the wrong thing because i really like this girl and she told me that she really likes me to and that she wants me as her boyfriend A.S.A.P.


Any answer will be thanked!!!

By the way, I'm 15 and she is 14 and were both freshman in high school.
What I think about it is well she is in a rush... she's probably just nervous but you need to make it known that well.. guys get nervous too! And she probably wants to go out with you again Tuesday because she's into you, she wants to learn more about you. Girls do that sometimes and we serriously don't mean to take it too fast or slow... guys do it too. So if it's bothering you just make it so she can understand your not as fast as everyone else is... she'll understand.

yea, im thinking its feelings weird because even though my ex and i are over 1000 miles away from eachother i still said "love" to her ans she meant the world to me and then she cheated on me and it hurt alot. I got up the courage to say it to my girlfriend now and im happy i did, i just dont like the wierdness

Ok, I think somewhere in the thread, I have gotten confused. :confused: I was thinking you stated earlier that you had not kissed anyone but maybe you just meant you had never kissed this new gal?? I reread the thread. When you mention the ex 1,000 miles away and you had told her you love her, I am wondering if I have not just misunderstood all along. If so, my posts probably seemed a little confusing to you. If you alread told one gal you love her and now this one, and saying this other one cheated on you, I would suggest thinking it through a little longer before confessing your feelings too much to any gal. I apologize Sch if I misunderstood everything. I know this can be a confusing time in life but it is also such an amazing time in life. I didn't want to add to your confusion by my posts. Just know that I wish you well, think things through, enjoy the journey and be honest with what is in your heart. Be honest, not only with yourself but with the girl. Best to you. :p

Tuank you and I understand that u got confused. My ex and I had a LDR. Thank you all 4 your advice, I'm very grateful.