Will he find me repulsive?

Sorry, if I hurt you anyway and if I seem cruel to you, I was correct or not, tell? I told you on the basis of my experience and my thinking and I may may must must have been incorrect too, just my opine, and about your height and weight, I learnt it from here and I am not worried or concerned about it, as I just advised in general as these facts and figures are not for 'reader' or so to take in consideration and aobut being cruel, I pardon again.

One more trick!
What about change in hairstyle, and if he can notices it and says, 'u done it nice?' then he is really in LOVE too much but if not, it means he ignores, it is what my friend NANCY applied, as she snipped off her knee-touching hair to a sleek and cute BOB, and her hubby said, "WOW"

Good for you! Once you see the weight start to come off with a sensible diet and exercise you will be much more satisfied with yourself and your self esteem will soar, believe me. I just wanted to kind of wake you up a bit as you have your whole life ahead of you.

I was 200 lbs when I had my son. I am 5'2". Due to my being this weight I had very serious complications due to eclampsia, my blood pressure went through the roof and I almost had a stroke. I almost died as well. The dr told me that I was extremely close even during my labor to going good bye. I did lose the weight and am porportional to my height now.

May I suggest the new South Beach Diet or the Dr. Atkins diet? I've had good results with Atkins but you don't want to stay on that very long. A friend and her hubby went on the South Beach Diet and he lost more weight quicker than she did. He was a very big boy like your hubby at 360 and she was tiny at 5'1". She did lose the weight she had gained from being pregnant though. They are both doing fine with their "new bodies" and are happier than ever.

The thing that keeps me from the Atkins diet is that my mother-in-law was on it, once she started to lose weight, she got pregnant! Lol. It was like, oh wow! I don't have the money to buy any special foods is the problem. And I work at a fast food restaurant right now. Since my husband is a big man, he tends to eat a lot more than I do so I have to keep a lot of food in the house...I guess I give into temptation. I was 170 lbs when he met me and I guess I have let myself go a little. I still am satisfied with myself, but I should to it for my health if nothing else. Thanks for all the good advice guys, it helps to know there are other people in the world that have these problems and worries!

Sorry to hear about your worry.

I don't think you have to worry right now, but it is a wake-up call for you showing you that you need more interests in your life than just being devoted to your husband and work. I think a few visits with a life coach would be very helpful to you, and you would enjoy them very much. All positive input. (Husbands and wives have to be careful that they don't get "stale" so that their partners take them for granted)



Best wishes in 2008!

Gloriouss, I am not sure as to what you are asking. There is a little bit of a communication barrier. I'm sorry. But many of these "diets" we refer to can be find on the internet by going to google.com and searching, and there are a lot of online diet programs. Have you hear od Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers?

Hi Holly,
Firstly, I don't think your husband is likely to up and leave you just because he's lost some weight and you haven't. I'm sure he loves yo as you are, and nothing's going to change that.
That being said, I think everyone should be encouraged to be fit and healthy, and losing a little weight probably wouldn't hurt. I'm glad to hear that you're going to the gym, but you could just as easily (and more cheaply) try simple things like walking more, or inventing a simple daily exercise routine, and watching what you eat.
Keep yourself healthy, and everything else will be easier for you.

All the best,

Kal

Where has my post gone to? Did someone delete it? Sorry, if I comitted some mistake. Sorry!

You can do a lot at home, without a gym. And yeah speaking as a guy than has some weight to loose himself. Its not about how you feel. I'm comfortable with my weight as I carry it fairly well (I'm 5'11 and 220 lbs), but its the health issues that the extra weight will aggravate as I get older I need to avoid as much as is possible.

I don't think anything mean was intended by the other poster. My wife is the one that has taken the effort to stay in great shape (she's in better shape now that she was 17 years ago) and watch her weight while I am the one that's been a bit lax. And yeah, some very good points have been made about losing the weight for those of us carrying more than we should...and most of us do belong to this category.

I have more than one thing I need to watch for due to things my family history High (blood pressure, arthritis, heart disease, colon cancer, cholesterol). And while we don't have money for either of us to go to a gym there is a lot we can do at home. True it might be easier at a gym, but you can do most of it at home.

Feeling good about yourself when you suffer high blood pressure, diabetes and arthritis from being overweight most of your life is sort of an oxymoron. All of those are less severe at a recommended weight, and sometimes even go away when the weight is lost. And yeah, more than one doctor has told me that. I'll be the first person to say it isn't easy. Habits are hard to break.

I moved Gloriuss's post, and made it into her own question.

I felt it would get too confusing to have both questions trying to be answered in the same thread.

You can find her post under "Weight Loss".

Will your husband stray because he will be more fit and will look at other women? I doubt it, but I can't get in his head. And he is likely looking at other women now... Its how guys are wired... And he's faithful to you, right? Guys are going to look, whether they are 50 lbs lighter or not.

Is your question really are women going to be looking more at him and giving him attention because he's more fit? Don't know. I have a beautiful wife who gets hit on. She can handle it. She's grounded in the marriage. It can be that simple.

A couple of points I don't want to pound but I agree with. First, as you age your metabolism will change. Staying the same weight now doesn't mean you will be able to sustain it. Its just life. It sucks. I've been through three major shifts in my metabolism that required work on my part to be where I want to be physically.

Working out, whether at the gym or at home is just as much about long term health, and its worth making it a priority. I'm really, really not trying to lecture you... I workout partly to look the way I want, but also to be healthy and present in my wife's and my sons future.

Two options: workout dvd's are cheap and you can put them in whenever it is convenient without leaving your home. A really good option for starting out. Also, the ymca has payment plans that can be structured around your financial ability to pay... Meaning if you say we'd like a fam membership and we can only afford X amount, they might work with you... Just an option. I have been told they don't turn people away for money reasons, and we've been long time members for some time... It feels more comfortable, its not the "hot spot" where all the "skinny people" go to connect. Just a thought. Its free to ask them about structuring affordable membership dues.

Other point is with weight drop his self image might improve. Not saying it was bad before, but its always a boost when you accomplish something like that. This could lead him to making working out a regular part of his life, which it should be irregardless of self image. If you are able to get yourself into a routine, its something you can do together. I'm in no way a workout fanatic, but I do have a schedule, and some of the time its with my wife... Its one more way to connect, support, and interact.

And don't be surprised if his libido goes up. A stronger self image, not to mention a stronger body, can result in this.

To end on a "happy note"... My cousin is in the best shape of his life. He was never really heavy, but hed put on some lbs and he wasn't active. Now his body is in a powerful place. Has he strayed from his wife who is kind of heavy? No. She claims he actually likes "bigger girls" (her words) and so does he... Not every guy wants the stick figures that strut down the runway. My cousin is a prime ex of a guy getting fit and not straying for one second from the woman he still loves and he still finds attractive and sexy. He's just wired to be attracted to her. I'm guessing your guy can be the same.