I was wondering could someone help me? Im 18 and first started having sex with my boyfriend for the first time last holloween. But i have never orgasmed while havig sex with
him. Well ive never orgasmed t all because hes my first and i cant seem to tell him. I really love hm and know this will hurt him if he finds out! HELP!

hollylovesbrandon

definitely don't lie to him. Never fake it. That just stinks. lol. Just tell him and you can work out ways together to make you orgasm (toys, position, etc.) plus, make sure you are using some form of protection.

kp2171

scour the thread in adult sexuality...

in fact do a search with "can't orgasm" and read the threads... this is common... so instead of rehashing whats been said, take a look there.

not saying dont ask questions, but look at the other threads on this subject.

short answer is that different women respond to different stimuli and the cl!toris is at a lousy place for some positions. also, much of sex is mental as well as physical, and guys often go too fast and dont understand how to stim you best.

again... physically one woman can like things another wont. ive dated a girl who could almost get off in tight jeans and ive dated a woman who could almost only get off with light oral sex.

Xrayman

i wish I had a dollar for each non-orgasm question posed on this site-I'd be a millionaire!

do a search throughout this site i'm sure you will be occupied for quite some time!

Synnen

You have to know what makes you tick before HE can know--do you think guys just KNOW how to make you orgasm?

Doesn't work like that.

I recommend honest communication with him, and then a few sessions masturbating--with or without him--to figure out what you like.

Uh-Oh23

I have found that if she is willing, my G/F have masturbated or otherwise SHOWN ME what she likes to be able to orgasm-this might be embarrassing for you at first, but turn it into a "fun" time for both of you! Us guys need instruction manuals sometimes. That way, all the romantic foreplay(sometimes days before the moment) will pay off for YOU-THE WOMAN, which is really what most guys want. So therefore, do not be embarrassed to talk to him about you going through a learning process. If he doesn't understand, you have about 10 yrs of dating ahead of you anyway, go find somebody who will understand...Good Luck!

Choux

I would guess that you want a boyfriend for social and cuddle reasons, not for reasons of passion.

Inner passion for a lover is a must! Otherwise, sex is just work.

When I was a lot younger, I read a book by Anais Nin to help me loosen up about sex. I had many mighty fine orgasms from just reading her erotica. Don't confuse erotica with pornography. Stay away from porn. Porn is selling orgasms for men; it's mechanical and women are simply receptacles. Erotica will help you kick in your brain with wonderful stories of hot passion.

Erotica, ah....."The Little Birds", Erotica by Anais Nin. Or, perhaps, "The Delta of Venus" by Anais Nin.

Good Luck!

Synnen

Just to put my 2 pennies in here...

Erotica is porn for women, where men are make-believe and too good to be true, with none of the faults and foibles that men in real life have, who always say the right thing at the right time, making real men faulty from the get-go.

It's all about which stimuli turn you on--for women, it's more mental; for men, it's more visual.

loveruleslindz

well mama most girls dont have a climax during intercourse till bout 24 u can usually still have a clitorus climax if u dont know what the is it the small bumb above ur hole if u rub and play with that u may be able to climax like the other girl said there is always toys oral sex and what not but

Choux

Syn,

That doesn't sound like the erotica I read.... men weren't like you describe at all!! What you describe is not a turn on....sounds like romance novels.

In porn, women are perfect charactures of women, doll like, and simply receptacles. Stay away from porn, check out Anais Nin.