 | |
| Browse | Ask | Answer | Search | Join/Login | |
I think my daughter is being sexually abused by my boyfriend of 7 years
Asked Jun 23, 2012, 06:04 PM
—
48 Answers I was 18 when I me my boyfriend he was 24, I had a one year old daughter from a previous relationship, he accepted my daughter & 6 months after dating I became pregnant with another girl, my oldest started calling him daddy since her biological father wasn't in the picture....well everything seemed fine for the first couple years, after 4 years of dating he introduced me to meth but I never got into it cuz my kids mean more to me, when he would get high he liked to masturbate a lot. One time I remember waking up & he wasn't in bed he was in my daughters room in an empty bed cuz both my girls fell asleep in same bed, he was masterbating to porn & said that was the only place he could get signal which we didn't get good signal he got up when I told him too & I told him that's not right & he said he wont do it again. He is an alcholic and druggy which he wasn't when I first met him... Well 5 years later we had another girl & he got high one night & I was sharing my bed with my 3 girls cuz we fell asleep watching a movie & my oldest fell asleep at the foot & I woke up to him trying to lay by her at the foot it looked like he was playing with himself so I woke my child up & made her get by my middle child .... It was my 2 month old, me, middle child then oldest in my king size bed I fell back asleep when she got close to me, then about 30 minutes I woke up to hearing her say I'm tired real loud then jerking her hand away and rolled onto her belly. I immediately jumped up and yanked the covers and saw her pants pulled down just pastd her butt & b4 I could say anything I was crying & he was saying what's wrong baby, your tripping. I made the girls get up & we went to my parents I didn't tell anyone in my family but a few days later I went to detective & had her interviewed & they said she didn't say anything happened so they closed case & said I can go back home. Now he is a registered sex offender for sleeping with a 14 yr old when he was 19, his brother is in jail for being accused of raping his girlfriends 7 yr old daughter but his isn't true cuz the girl was told to say that, but I have seen things with my own eyes an I feel disgusted & I never asked her cuz I'm scared I do love him but I am going to protect my kids. He seems to only have interest in my oldest though, he gets drunk everyday just about & he stares at her weird & when i catch him he looks away quickly, He denied everything but doesn't seem to be honest! Please tell me what u think I should do. We have been together for 7 years now, my oldest is 8 our kids we have together are 5 and 7 months. |
48 Answers
| ||||
| Just to add: in case you're confused --- this man has all the signs of being a sexual molester and he is sexually abusing your kids. Your daughter may have lied to protect herself .. or he may be on the verge of doing more.... what you saw should be enough to get you out of there --- a shelter can help you. | ||||
| |
| ||||
| Ok.... I was young when we got together....SORRY.... I was looking for advice, when we got together I knew of his past & I talked to the derivative he told me about his case & he was a great man.... He brained washed me & all of these signs r recent except the one where he was laying in bed watching porn separated bed than the girls & they were asleep. And the drugs isn't everyday & he doesn't do them in front of the kids cuz I don't allow that & he does drink in front of them but that's not illegal& I only tried meth twice cuz I was young & dumb, I don't do drugs & I have learning disabilities & have trouble remembering & functioning things in my head but I have had this thought for awhile now & I AM trying to do the right thing cuz I am a damn GOOD mother, I am trying to protect my babies. Everything is recent & I am just now realizing what's going on.... Sooooo why the hell am I the one being called dumb & stupid & a bad mom. I am young & trying to do the right thing & y'all don't know & not in my situation & don't know my life I was seeking help & advice but guess I came to the wrong place | ||||
| |
| ||||
| Quote:
I have no idea what talking to his derivative means so someone will have to fill me in on that. He does drugs but not every day and not in front of the children (although I would assume they are aware of the after effects) and that's all right with you? He watches porn when they are in the next bed but they are asleep - right? And the molestation part? How are you now explaining that? Why are you being called a bad Mom - because a good Mom would not allow her children to be molested exposed to porn, drugs, and alcohol and then plead her age and "learning disabilities" as excuses. You are aware that IF he is molesting the children and IF anyone finds out you will lose custody, right? Stop excusing his behavior and protect your children! | ||||
| |
| ||||
| Quote:
Counseling is needed ASAP. | ||||
| |
| ||||
| Quote:
| ||||
| smoothy (Jul 2, 2012 05:09 AM):
Abusive comments towards members...when its abundently clear who really has the messed up life. Source:.
Alty (Jul 5, 2012 02:33 PM):
We can only go by what you've written, and from what you've written you are a major part of the problem. You're being judged because of your lack of action about all of this. Source:Common sense.
|
| ||||
| Whoa....YOU are the one that has the house with the molestor in it...with the drug use... Its NOT Judging you when YOU are the one that said this is all happening.....its a statement of fact. HUGE difference. Everything JudyKayTee states is a fact...and exactly what most normal parents would be thinking and doing. Hell most normal SINGLE people would think it too. Not to mentioned people without kids. And you are in fact making excuses by defending it....and your own actions, not just in words but deeds as well. Seriously are you going to wait for CPS to take your kids before you acknowledge that there are a number of real problems that need addressing? If you lived near me I would have called them...no kids need to deal with what is going on in your house. This is one of those situations that are black or white....there are no shades of grey... | ||||
| |
| |||||||
| Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Believe me, if I had the ability to report you to the authorities I would do that in a heartbeat. You are a very disturbed individual. Oh, and Judy, sorry I had to quote you here, but the way the OP worded her last post it was the easiest way to quote her responses to you. | |||||||
| |
| ||||
| Quote:
Why post a question when you have absolutely no interest in any opinion other than that inside your head? Enabler, not enabler, she is a co-abuser. And, yes, I'd be on the phone with CPS in a heartbeat. | ||||
| |
| ||||
| I will not call you dumb or stupid, if you have packed your bag and are not out of the house. If you sleep another night with him in the house around the kids, then those are really nicer than I would use. | ||||
| |
| ||||
| Quote:
Please don't give me the 'no where to go' story after only five months ago (going by what you give as your youngest child's age), you went to your family. What happened in five months to close that door? Contact your local police or children's services and ask for the location of the nearest women's shelter. They can also help you get there. Contact a support group for family members of alcoholics and drug abusers. They can give you support to stay away from him and keep from repeating a bad pattern. Be honest with yourself. Love doesn't conquer all. It can be a boulder that you carry on your back until you realize that it wasn't love. It was your own addiction and co-dependency keeping you there. Love yourself and your children enough to let the self-deception go. Let the fear go. Take the blinders off and see where you have been ignoring red flags since you learned about his past. He isn't the person you thought he was or wanted him to be. 4+5=9 According to this post, you were with him for four years before the incident in the girl's room (backed up by your post about him not bringing meth around you for 4 to five years) and it was another five years until the more recent events. So you have been with him for about 9 years instead of 7. | ||||
| |
Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions
| Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
Check out some similar questions!
6 year old daughter sexually abused by my nephew [ 21 Answers ]
My daughter is 6 years old and just told me that my 16 year old nephew has been playing touching games with her. My sister and I are really close and her kids are like my daughter's older brothers. I would have never suspected that this was going on and I am always on the watch for suspicious...
Daughter, 21, is being physically abused by her 26 yr old boyfriend. [ 12 Answers ]
I just found out this morning that my 21 yr old daughter was slapped across the face, at her 21st birthday party, by her boyfriend. This was in front of people. This worries me because I believe if the abuse becomes public, it has already become 'routine' so to speak. He is a full blown...
Does my boyfriend view my 5yr old daughter sexually? [ 18 Answers ]
I met this man at work and he was married. We always had an unspoken vibe; he had told me he would love to take me and my daughter out to get to see the city sometime (after months of knowing each other). I thought it somewhat strange since he was married, but didn't think too much of it. We did...
My daughter, sexually abused, has a love/hate relationsip with me [ 11 Answers ]
Hello My daughter, now in her mid 20's, was sexually abused by a family friend when she was very young, and she and her brother used to stay with them and play with their children. I have given my daughter all the love and support I can. My trouble is that the wife of this man knew of...
View more Adult Sexuality questions Search
