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    fml666's Avatar
    fml666 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 18, 2010, 05:30 PM
    Is it illegal for a 12 year old to date a 17 year old?
    I am 12 years old and I am IN LOVE with a 17 year old and we both live in capefair,mo. He loves me so much and doesn't want any other girl but me. My mother accepts our happiness together but not my father. Me and the 17 year old don't want to have a sexual relationship all we want to do is kiss,hold hands,hug, and show we love each other in a sweetly public way. Is it illegal for us to date?
    lady_joker's Avatar
    lady_joker Posts: 4, Reputation: -2
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    #2

    Oct 29, 2010, 09:25 PM
    I myself can't really say much because I'm datin an older boy 2 but all I can say is if your mom is OK with it and he doesn't care about the age differense then you sholdnt really care if its legal or not start thinking of the legal age if guys are having sex because then you can have problems
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Oct 29, 2010, 09:27 PM

    No first of all of course the 17 year old is going to be interested in sex, that is most likley the only reason he is interested in a 12 year old.

    Also if he touches any part of your body considered sexual, even with clothing on, that is molesting a child and is a crime.

    So yes what you already described is against the law and your dad can have him in jail quickly.
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #4

    Oct 29, 2010, 09:46 PM

    So you believe that he isn't interested in sex? So in the future you see, what happens when you are 16 and he is 21? You expect this relationship to last and stay completely non-sexual? You are risking the boy you are IN LOVE with to be sent to jail and labeled a sexual predator for the REST of his life.

    I don't believe that your Mother favors this relationship.
    artlady's Avatar
    artlady Posts: 4,208, Reputation: 1477
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    #5

    Oct 29, 2010, 09:57 PM

    You are too young to even understand the complexity of who you are! You have to know who you are as a maturing and intelligent young woman before you ever let some guy that old be with you.
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    Germain77 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Nov 20, 2011, 09:34 PM
    Thanks or your question, my best assumption is that as long as your maintain some sort of 'sexual relationship' (eg, as defined by my local law, kissing or even holding hands etc.)it is generally illegal but it depends on what country and state you live in and the age of consent laws, it's a delicate topic for me personally since a 12yr old girl was basically in love with me when I was 17/18 myself, it was quite bizzarre because as beautiful as she was, I knew it was illegal even if anything was consential, in my case, we may live on opposite sides of the world, but I love her very profoundly in return a few years later and we still send each other beautiful e-mails and gifts and everything, it sounds to me, that a 'lay-by' option might be best for your boyfriend because you don't want him getting into trouble with the law, best wishes!
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_consent

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_consent
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    lilmama0233 Posts: 1, Reputation: -1
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    #7

    Aug 7, 2012, 05:37 PM
    It's does not matter what age you are what matter is who the person is because you might ending up getting hurt and his might lye to you and you might just believe it.Im 12 and I am in love with this guy who is 17 year old he likes me but he does not now I like him but.All that matter is becareful to who you love.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #8

    Aug 7, 2012, 05:46 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by lilmama0233 View Post
    it's does not matter what age u are what matter is who the person is because u might ending up geting hurt and his might lye to u and u might just believe it.Im 12 and i am in love with this guy who is 17 year old he likes me but he does not now i like him but.All that matter is becareful to who u love.
    So you're saying that the original poster should ignore the law, and do what she wants?

    If the poster said "I really like this shirt I saw in the store, but I don't have any money. I'm going to steal it because I want it", would you tell her it's okay? Is that your moral compass, to disregard the law and do whatever you want, to get whatever you want?

    If so, heaven help you. And heaven help that 17 year old you want, because if he acts on it, he'll end up in jail.

    Laws are laws. You can't do what you want when there's a law saying it's not allowed. If you do, be prepared to pay the price for breaking that law.
    14007's Avatar
    14007 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Dec 6, 2012, 06:46 PM
    The thing is everyone assumes that guys always want sex me personally I don't want sex until I'm married I am good with my hands and all so yeah a relationship isn't based on sex and age alone it should be based on if u like the person or not
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    14007 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Dec 6, 2012, 06:49 PM
    I am way too tired of people thinking that guys want sex all of the time I am not even that type of guy and there a 5 year difference between the people in my opinion it is OK and as long as they respect each other then it should be OK so parents need to stop acting like that their daughters having boyfriends is a bad idea because the girl should be able to make their own decisions
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #11

    Dec 6, 2012, 08:12 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by 14007 View Post
    I am way too tired of people thinking that guys want sex all of the time I am not even that type of guy and there a 5 year difference between the people in my opinion it is ok and as long as they respect each other then it should be ok so parents need to stop acting like that their daughters having boyfriends is a bad idea because the girl should be able to make their own decisions
    So, what does a 17 year old have in common with a 12 year old? The 17 year old can drive, goes to high school, will soon be an adult with a job. The 12 year old has to ask permission to cross the street and needs a babysitter when her parents go out. So why would a 17 year old want to date a 12 year old child?

    The thing is, your opinion doesn't matter. The law is the law, and there's a law for a reason, to protect children, because they're not mature enough, or smart enough to protect themselves.

    In other words, you can think what you want, but the law doesn't agree.
    myeverything13's Avatar
    myeverything13 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Apr 24, 2013, 06:55 PM
    I'm 13, dating a 17 year old but he lives in France and I live in Texas. Yeah its kind of weird but I agree with half and half of what these people are saying. Yes, its dangerous because if anybody sees anything that they think may be illegal, they WILL report it to the cops. Now in Texas I THINK (not sure) its OK until they reach the age of 18 and after that damn right its illegal but follow your heart. I'm not saying break the law but I'm not saying break his heart. If you're into him going to jail then let him do things he shouldn't. If you are out and about and want to kiss or hold hands make sure you aren't 2 ft lower than him :P
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #13

    Apr 24, 2013, 07:38 PM
    Please define "dating" when you are countries apart.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #14

    Apr 24, 2013, 07:49 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by JudyKayTee View Post
    Please define "dating" when you are countries apart.
    I'd guess that they Facebook chat, or text. Back in my day that wasn't called dating, that was called having a pen pal. Of course we actually used pens and paper to correspond with our pen pals. :)
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #15

    Apr 25, 2013, 06:22 AM
    Pens? Paper? My mother told me about such things. I, of course, have no personal knowledge.

    Of course.
    emogirlheart's Avatar
    emogirlheart Posts: 19, Reputation: 0
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    #16

    May 2, 2013, 07:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Alty View Post
    So you're saying that the original poster should ignore the law, and do what she wants?

    If the poster said "I really like this shirt I saw in the store, but I don't have any money. I'm going to steal it because I want it", would you tell her it's okay? Is that your moral compass, to disregard the law and do whatever you want, to get whatever you want?

    If so, heaven help you. And heaven help that 17 year old you want, because if he acts on it, he'll end up in jail.

    Laws are laws. You can't do what you want when there's a law saying it's not allowed. If you do, be prepared to pay the price for breaking that law.
    I'm sorry to barge in on you like this AGAIN but if she can just try and get the father to like him, as long as they don't have sex, it's perfectly legal as long as the dad says yes.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #17

    May 2, 2013, 08:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by emogirlheart View Post
    I'm sorry to barge in on you like this AGAIN but if she can just try and get the father to like him, as long as they don't have sex, it's perfectly legal as long as the dad says yes.
    If her father agrees to allow his 12 year old to date this 17 year old, you're right, it's legal. But that's dating. Any sexual contact at all, and he'd end up in jail. I don't know many 17 year olds that would be happy with a relationship where they can't even kiss their girlfriend.

    But you're right, if the parents agree to their child dating this boy, it's legal. No one ever said otherwise.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #18

    May 3, 2013, 04:59 AM
    Emogirl, as the two time victim of rape before age 15 I would think you would be the most conservative person when it comes to dating and an age difference, but you are not.

    I would think you would understand sexual grooming, but it is apparent that you do not.

    A 12 year old is no match for a 17 year old.

    I don't understand where you are coming from.
    kpocotn's Avatar
    kpocotn Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #19

    Jul 8, 2013, 11:49 PM
    Not every guy is bad, it is always looked at as the guys fault the girl is just as much in it. She has feelings this young because of nobody else but herself. 17 is also not legal yet so he does not risk jail time until he turns 18.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #20

    Jul 9, 2013, 07:49 AM
    You missed the whole point - the "girl" (by virtue of being an underage "girl") is not as much into "it" as the guy. She cannot legally make a mature decision due to her age.

    Are you 1 person with 2 screen names?

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