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    View Sonic's Avatar
    View Sonic Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 22, 2009, 07:25 PM
    My new girlfriend
    Ok so me and this girl have been dating for about 2 weeks now but we talked for like 3 months before I asked her out cause she has had a problem with having long relationships and I wanted to make sure we could last and she told me she thought we could so I asked her out.

    So far things have been pretty good but there is 1 problem and that is that she texts and talks to this other guy that lives far away like a few states away that she met 1 time.I didn't have a problem with her texting this guy but its gotten to the point where they text almost nonstop like hours a day and me and her used to do that before we started dating but not so much now.I asked her about this guy and she says they just friends but I have seen on her phone she has had his contact name set to "My Baby" and "My World" at one time and have even seen on my friends phone that her phone sig at 1 time was "Loving (guys name here)" I asked her about this and she made up some bs reasons about it.


    I really like this girl and trust her cause I mean this guy does live far away but its just starting to get to me and I guess since like her so much I been playing dumb to the stuff going on and hoping maybe since she probably will not see this guy for a long time if ever that she might lost interest in him and start giving more to me.I mean when we are around each other were both pretty affection and like each other but I just don't know anymore.Should I stay in the relationship and hope for the best or just end it while its still early?
    JoeCanada76's Avatar
    JoeCanada76 Posts: 6,669, Reputation: 1707
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    #2

    Mar 22, 2009, 08:27 PM

    It sounds like your just dating? It is not really relationship status yet. It takes time. It is up to you whether you stick around or not. What do you want to do and do it. Never regret any moment. No matter how long, how short it may be. There is never any guarantee.

    Texting that much to somebody else, no wonder you feel not to good about it. It is up to you to give it time or not.

    Joe
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    #3

    Mar 22, 2009, 10:15 PM
    But me and her are going out as boyfriend and girlfriend for 2 weeks now and I just feel she isn't as commenited to the relationship as I am cause of the those things I named. I mean she used to be crazy over me like always texting me and stuff like that but it seems now she isn't as much but I can tell when were around each other that she still does like me but this far away guy is really just starting to get to me but she says they just friends but would you name your friend "My Baby" and "My World" When you got yourself a boyfriend already?


    Idk I just don't know what to do cause I mean I really like her but is it worth hanging on to if she likes this other guy as much as I think she does?Maybe she'll lose interest in him since they never see each other but I don't know.
    none12345's Avatar
    none12345 Posts: 1,439, Reputation: 234
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    #4

    Mar 22, 2009, 10:53 PM

    Dude some advice. You are there buddy, you got her first. Not that guy. So talk to her about how you feel about this but don't make it seem like you're jealous. Of what I've learned from a relationship jealousy pushes the girl away further. Maybe let them be for now since they live so far away and you were with her first I doubt it won't develop to something more.

    She probably just like flirting or whatever but talk to her about it. Tell her you feel uncomfortable about it. Sounds like she's not ready for a commitment. Are you looking for commitment? Maybe you guys aren't looking for the same thing? Would that go well together? Here are some of the questions you should ask yourself. Anyway good luck~ ill reply if you post more and if you need someone to talk to =P
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    View Sonic Posts: 7, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Mar 22, 2009, 11:59 PM
    I understand what your saying man but I mean it just gets to me a lot now like she's hiding it from me by not letting me see her phone ever even just to listen to her songs or deleteing her phone sig when she texts me.Also 1 time when I text her and I got a text back saying hey then like a sec after that I got one and it said "baby me back" I asked her what she meant and he said "Nvm"


    It's the little things like that that's getting to me I mean this girl used to really like me like a lot but now it seems like she still likes me but nothing of what she used to.I guess I just like her so much that I isn't really want to put too much into it and risk it ending when it just got started but there's just so much I can handle of that little bs stuff.
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    godofthunder75 Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Mar 23, 2009, 12:16 AM

    Every time she texts him and talks to him nonstop for hours every day she is thinking about him and not you. The danger signs should be flashing buddy, although you might be there 'physically' it seems like she isn't there mentally. What happens if this dude comes for a visit? Then you are on here writing about your girl cheating on you. Guaranteed. In the beginnings of a relationship is when you are at your most giddy and can't seem to get enough of each other... yet she seems to not care. I'd dump her fast. Bad news.
    Dare81's Avatar
    Dare81 Posts: 264, Reputation: 44
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    #7

    Mar 23, 2009, 12:38 AM

    You two have only been dating for 2 weeks, if I was you I would cut my losses.There are plenty of other women out there.
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    #8

    Mar 23, 2009, 12:47 AM
    I see what your saying but I don't know I just don't know. I think maybe its time to sit her down and have a long talk about this guy and if she does care for this guy more then me I guess me and her just will have to call it quits as much as I don't want to I just can't handle much more of the bs stuff.
    Maybe I waited to long to ask her to be my girl cause she used to be head over heels for me but I could tell she changed even before I asked her and I think it was cause of that guy.
    Dare81's Avatar
    Dare81 Posts: 264, Reputation: 44
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    #9

    Mar 23, 2009, 12:55 AM

    Actions are louder than words.
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    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #10

    Mar 23, 2009, 05:42 AM

    I would have taken off running as soon as the texting all day started, but to see "my baby" and "my world" as his contact name. Dude, that is YOUR spot and she's putting him under it, grow a pair and walk away with some self respect. You already tried to talk to her and she didn't care. What is going to change?
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    #11

    Mar 23, 2009, 10:41 AM

    I know your right but I guess I'm just delaying what I know I should do but I just I was just hoping where she likes me and is around me and not him that maybe she would lose interest in him and me and her could take off cause other then this other guy things have been pretty good.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #12

    Mar 23, 2009, 03:42 PM

    No way do you two have a relationship after two weeks, so drop the notion she owes you any changes, or a say in, what she does, and with whom.

    All you have is an agreement to check each other out. Don't bother with saying "but", that's the whole reality of your situation, and I would never have gone for it.

    You're here, but her attentions are elsewhere, what's wrong with that picture, and why are you putting your whole heart into this stranger.

    TWO WEEKS??
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    AandZ4ever Posts: 151, Reputation: 5
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    #13

    Mar 23, 2009, 05:21 PM

    Listen, new relationships are tricky hang in there for a little while and see how things turn out. As for the whole you not texting nonstop but they do thing, she may text her friends like crazy which is why she probably doesn't to you anymore, because your more than her friend. Plus she probably sees you a lot more now so there's no need to stalk you via text. If your so concerned then ask her how she truly feels about this mystery man. BUt don't tell her who she can and can't be friends with. Tell me how it goes!
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    #14

    Mar 23, 2009, 11:15 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by AandZ4ever View Post
    Listen, new relationships are tricky hang in there for a little while and see how things turn out. As for the whole u not texting nonstop but they do thing, she may text her friends like crazy which is why she probably doesnt to u anymore, because ur more than her friend. plus she probably sees u a lot more now so theres no need to stalk u via text. if ur so concerned then ask her how she truly feels about this mystery man. BUt dont tell her who she can and can't be friends with. tell me how it goes!

    Well I get what your saying but at the start of relationships you would think that both partys would be nonstop wanting mode for each other but it seems like me and her are talking less and less now while she just texts this other guy more and more and with the names she had him as it just starting to add up that she wants this other guy even if he lives far away and probably won't be seeing him for months or years cause her family never goes down to his state anymore.


    Idk I'm give it a few more weeks and see how she's actting cause she texts this guy when me and her are together and that's what gets to me most and I don't want to say nothing to her about it cause I don't want to be telling her who she can and can't text cause I'm sure that would push us apart.
    kirriky's Avatar
    kirriky Posts: 80, Reputation: 26
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    #15

    Mar 24, 2009, 03:26 AM
    Two weeks is nothing. You say before that she used to text you. Now she's texting this guy she's only met once. She said she wasn't good at longterm relationships for a reason.

    Walk away now, the longer you stay the more it'll hurt in the end. And no, I don't think she's going to change for the better. I mean, texting "her baby" and "her world" nonstop while she's with her boyfriend? Walk away while you have some dignity left. Okay you tried to get to know her but you didn't like what you saw. Why put yourself through more suffering.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #16

    Mar 24, 2009, 05:22 AM

    Just like you found her, you can find another one just as easy.
    AandZ4ever's Avatar
    AandZ4ever Posts: 151, Reputation: 5
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    #17

    Mar 24, 2009, 06:48 PM

    Did u ever maybe think this guy was made up? A way to get you jealous? I'm making it a stretch here but she seems way too into this person that lives so far away. My baby and my world seem like ways to hurt u almost. Maybe she put them there on purpose for u too see. I don't know but just confront her. If u keep it bottled up it will not turn out good.
    dealmein's Avatar
    dealmein Posts: 54, Reputation: 9
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    #18

    Mar 24, 2009, 08:56 PM

    Everything about this just screams "runaway" The only stretch of the imagination that gives this "relationship" some hope is she's made this guy up and is trying to keep you jealous and second guessing her to keep it interesting and exciting. This in itself I'd runaway from because it sounds like she has some problems.

    I'm sorry to say it but it looks like once she got you she stopped being excited by you. If she was head over heals for you there's no way she'd even think about sharing stuff with another guy. Even guy friends will take a backburner to you. This isn't the case here.

    Listen. Just stop phoning the girl... no texts unless she texts you don't bother. Don't see her say your busy if she wants to hang out. Give yourself some respect and stop clinging onto this girl its not sexy... not cool and it won't make her want you the more you moan at her. You must see that. Its hard to see it but you know its true. Don't even give her the satisfaction of telling her its over just act as if you're not officially even going out. I mean... she is so why don't you.

    As many people on here have said and I'm saying AGAIN give yourself some dignity and respect in this situation and get out.
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    #19

    Mar 25, 2009, 09:29 PM

    Ok I talked it out with her and we worked things out she said she feels good about our relationship and doesn't want to break up and that she just the kind of person that doesn't stay up her boyfriend butt all the time.

    I talked it with her yesterday and since then she's been great like texting me more wanting to come over to see me which she done and the good thing is that she didn't text anyone while she was with me.So maybe she understands how I was feeling and is trying to act different I don't know but its all good atm.

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