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I have a friend who recently told me that she is being sexually abused at home. she said her dad has been sexually abusing her since she was a little kid. She wont let me go to the cops about it, and she says if I do she will deny it on the stand if it goes to court. I dont know what to do. She called me the other night after it had happend again and she was crying and it made her so sick that she would throw up. I want to help her but i dont know what I can do without going to the cops, and if she is just going to deny it i dont know how going to the cops would even help. Any ideas?
This is an awful position for a friend to be in. I know if there is nothing she wants done about it she would not have told anyone. It could be her age that is keeping her from talking to the cops. but I would try to find some information for her to help her with the stress she must be feeling. If you can talk to a councilor and ask them what you might could do for a friend and keep her confidence it would help you to know how to help your friend. I would just tell the councilor I have a friend and I have to keep her name out of this but I really need to help her what can I do? Really to address this question I would refer you to a professional, because this is a life altering action that is being taken upon your friend and you need accurate information in order to help her get past this and seek help. She must get out of this. If she is a minor she may be afraid of the court system and embarrassed, so it is going to be very touchy. Get her some help confidentially.
Your friend desperately needs your help and her confiding in you is her first cry for help.
Does she have access to a computer whereby she can contact people online ie the samaritans to talk her through the options.
Personally i feel that she needs to get out and go to a relative to seek some help however she is obviously scared of the roller coaster of events that will follow.
Could you maybe invite your friend for a sleep over and you go online together - she really needs your support now and will do to see her through this whole thing as the only way to stop this is to expose it!
Her mother would be mortifyed if she knew this was happening to her baby - can she not tell mum , please remind her that she must not feel ashamed , she has not bought this on herself and the only one that is in the wrong is her father!!
Your friend is seeking help. I remember when I was little and my brother was raping me I told a freind what was happening. She told her mom and I got help. You cant' just let it keep happening. You need to go to CPS. She will thank you later for helping her.
I have a friend who recently told me that she is being sexually abused at home. she said her dad has been sexually abusing her since she was a little kid. She wont let me go to the cops about it, and she says if I do she will deny it on the stand if it goes to court. I dont know what to do. She called me the other night after it had happend again and she was crying and it made her so sick that she would throw up. I want to help her but i dont know what I can do without going to the cops, and if she is just going to deny it i dont know how going to the cops would even help. Any ideas?
Maybe tell your parents or a adult relation how worried you are for her and they will react in the way most decent adults would, it would be out of your hands and it would be stopped and all you would have done would have been to voice your concern for a friend, she would thank you for it in the end, this man is a monster, let the adults take charge. Take care, love and peace anne x
You poor thing, this must be awful for you but you should be very pleased that your friend trusts you enough to tell you about this. Coming on here and looking for help shows that you are a great friend who wants to help.
You need to try and get her to tell her mother. It is very likely that this man is threatening her to keep quiet or leading her to believe that this is, in some way her own fault. People who do these things are controlling and she is not to be blamed for believing these lies. Let her know that you will support her and even be there when she tells her mother if she needs you to. Also, sadly, there are mothers out there who know what is happening. This is an awful truth that you have to be prepared for. Other mothers will believe that their child is lying because they too have fallen victim to these controlling people. Try and get her to discuss it with her mother, if that does not help or does not get the reaction you were hoping for then you MUST tell someone. Your mother, a teacher ect. You may be worried that you are breaking a friendship by doing this but you have to remember that some things in life are far more important! If you let this go on you will never forgive yourself and she will eventually may be hurt that you did not save her when she needed you.
Do not worry that is she denies it you will look silly. That will never be the case. Also people who work with children have to complete training on child protection. They know when a child is covering for an adult and are trained to reasure the child into telling them what has happened. They will deal with this. Your mother may be able to alert the police and social services for you.
Please, I beg you, do not allow this to continue. A man like this needs to be stopped!
I would like to take back something I said above. Tell your mother now. Dont wait, because you need support in this too! After all I presume you are just a child too. She will support you and know what to do.
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