difficulty with masturbation means either you dont know what to do to make yourself get there, or your mind is so not into it that you cannot get there, or theres some other underlying problem.
my partner admitted to me, after i asked her, that shes only once or twice climaxed in the missionary position in her life, as in with all partners counted. she enjoys it. she doesnt fake (so she says, and i believe her... were pretty open about when things are clicking or not... if i dont get her there shell tell me i have unfinished business to take care of later) so i knew i had never gotten her there in that position. generally she needs to be on top to have more control and more stimulation of both the cl1toris and the g spot. a few other positions can work from time to time, but they all involve multiple stimulations, and in some cases, she needs to self stimulate while im inside her to get there. there was one postion i favor that never worked for her at all (for almost 4 years) until she began to self stim while we were having sex. she also dislikes some breast stim at the beginning, but it can be powerful to push her over the edge.
can he get you off orally? if you arent directing him during sex, then probably no... since this also takes work and input from you concerning what you like and timing and all.
have you tried a vibrator to push the self stimulatin over the top. really, if you dont know what you like, its hard to tell him.
i guess the best i can say is when my partner and i are having problems climaxing, the thing that usually makes it work is changing stimulations. you body have more than a few sensative areas, and when the stimulations are altered, or timing is changed, it should bring you closer to getting where you want to be.
also, do you always make it about him? have you tried not pleasing him and solely focusing on what feels good to you and not waiting until hes done.
and, of course, what about foreplay. by the time you have sex are you well lubricated and also MENTALLY there? if lubrication is a problem, and it might be since you mention pain, thats an easy fix. the mental side can be hard, especially when you have a history of it going nowhere.
plus... faking it and not talking to your partner are really bad ideas. you are setting yourself up for this, to some degree. you really dont want to fake it, do you? then you need to talk to him about trying some other things.
and just so you know its not only you, here is a recent posting. there are others like it.
http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/adult-s...asm-31822.html
what are your thoughts or answers?
Im 21 have a bf who does not know i fake, sex is ok but just starts to hurt after a while i am really attracted to him i dont think its his problem it is me ive never climaxed before with any other partner, not even when masterbating it feels ok but i just get bored after a while and it sometimes brgins to hurt & feel uncomfortable. Please help
Use this time in order to get to know yourself. You will be thankful. And do will your partner.
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