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Home > Family & People > Adult Sexuality   »   I'm 20 and my husband is 23. He doesn't want to sleep with me anymore.

 
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Old Feb 5, 2007, 08:30 AM
hollow_wings
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I'm 20 and my husband is 23. He doesn't want to sleep with me anymore.

Well, let's see here. Before my husband and I were married, we had amazing sex. All the time. In fact, I couldn't keep him away from me, and it was great. Ever since we got married though, ONLY 2 MONTHS AGO, his desire to sleep with me seems to be... gone.

I'm only 20 and he's 23. This is his sexual prime, I don't understand what's wrong. He says everything is still "mindblowing" when we do it, and he says that I'm sexier now than ever before. I've even lost weight since we've been married instead of the usual "I got married and got fat" syndrome. I've tried talking to him, I've tried spicing things up, but really, I'm sick of always having to initiate everything.

I feel unwanted and hideous, and I don't know what else to do.
Help?!
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Old Feb 5, 2007, 09:15 AM   #2  
Stac33
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Does your husband EVER initiate it? How often do you have sex? Is he maybe stressed from work or something? It seems that you two have an open line of communication though. That's key here. I totally understand that you feel unwanted and hideous. That is the woman in you. Men tend to not feel that way so much. When you do talk to him is he open? Does he feel as though something is wrong? Does he have an explaination?
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Old Feb 5, 2007, 10:06 AM   #3  
laylow80
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Maybe your husband felt before you were married, that he had to have sex with you to keep you around. And now that you two are married, he knows he has you, and doesn't feel the need to as much. But thats a weird attitude towards things, i'd think that once married, you would have sex more often.
Try talking to him about this, see what is on his mind. Maybe there is something else on his mind that is distracting him from your sexual life. Not another woman or anything, maybe there is just a chance he is depressed over something. Communication is the key to any good marriage/relationship, so talk to him. Hope this helps.
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Old Feb 5, 2007, 10:27 AM   #4  
kp2171
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even a good marriage can have stresses... and contrary to popular belief, sometimes the honeymoon period is the most stressful. my wife and i had more stress and fights in that first year or so than we have had in the rest of our now 7 year marriage.

stress can be an absolute killer for the libido. is he sleeping well? working more? working out? stressed about money, etc?

i think its normal to go through cycles of wanting sex more sometimes and less others.

long term, its not good for your relationship. short term, it might just be a temporary downturn.
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Old Feb 11, 2007, 03:06 PM   #5  
NiHi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hollow_wings
Well, let's see here. Before my husband and I were married, we had amazing sex. All the time. In fact, I couldn't keep him away from me, and it was great. Ever since we got married though, ONLY 2 MONTHS AGO, his desire to sleep with me seems to be... gone.

I'm only 20 and he's 23. This is his sexual prime, I don't understand what's wrong. He says everything is still "mindblowing" when we do it, and he says that I'm sexier now than ever before. I've even lost weight since we've been married instead of the usual "I got married and got fat" syndrome. I've tried talking to him, I've tried spicing things up, but really, I'm sick of always having to initiate everything.

I feel unwanted and hideous, and I don't know what else to do.
Help?!
May be he has problems with erection? Extagen helps a lot. May be he has stressful job... Or other problems...
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Old Feb 11, 2007, 03:12 PM   #6  
TheSavage
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By chance now that your married are you wanting a baby and he is not? [Just a random thought]
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Old Feb 11, 2007, 06:15 PM   #7  
Want2Know
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You may be creating your own problem. Maybe you are expecting too much of yourself and him. Let it happen naturally.
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