I know this is probably too much info but I need help... anyway my husband really wants to have anal sex but we have tried it before and I made him stop because it hurt of course, but what I want to know is there anyway to ease into it without it hurting?:confused:

Using a lube, start with a finger, then a bigger finger then a bigger finger. Keep trying thefinger maybe for a week or two, until ou don't feel pain then have him use lube, and start with hiss head then a little more and a little more. Until you don't feel the pain. It's a long process but take it slow because he if do rush and you make him pull out to fast... you could end up really hurt.

I'm sorry if this was to graphic... I'm just trying to help.

Good luck.

You have to concentrate on relaxing your anal sphincter, your partner can use saliva to smooth the way.

I recommend that you don't engage in this practice... disease, hemmorhoids, and it is abusive if you don't really dig it.

There are always a lot of good available men waiting for you to choose one. You don't have to stay with a guy who won't listen to you. :)

Thanks, no you weren't to graphic hopefully this will work. Thanks again

Condom and lots of lube, as to avoid any anal passage tearing, but I strongly recommend avoiding it if your not comfortable with it, it can be very painful and potentially dangerous.

My husband recently tried anal sex. While we have tried it before we really put a valiant effort forth this time. We used a lube and started with a finger and then two fingers. Then we tried his penis and it just would not go in no matter what position or how hard we tried. I know that my problem was that I was not relaxed and was not loose enough. Also, we used a warming sensation lube which was a bad idea. So, I would suggest you trying to first have a lot of foreplay. You must be warmed up and in the mood to be able to fully relax. If you are not relaxed it won't happen. Then, you must try a good lube... not a warming one as this will just make you more uncomfortable. Have your man gently ease in a finger. Then after that's worked in try two fingers. Then you might be able to start inserting the penis. It will be painful, it will be uncomfortable, it will be a long process. But, if it's something you desire then I say give it a try. It might feel good.

Hi, cece21!

Sure, you can try to ease into such a thing.

However, the bottom line to me would be that those places on the body aren't designed to be joined in that way. Even if you try to ease into it, it might not work.

If you're still uncomfortable even after trying a number of times, then I would like to assume that your husband will be understanding and loving in that regard as to your needs.

Thanks!

A dildo, lubed up and inserted slowly and gently into his anus will teach him exactly how to have anal sex with you.

If it hurt you moved too fast.


You have to be able to relax... try a finger then two then three, lubed of course with clipped and smooth finger nails... you know you are relaxed when you can stop clmping down on the fingers..

Next he has to go slow... if it hurts he is moving too fast or needs lube.

Once you can do that a litle at a time until he's fully in and you are in a comfortible position then you will be able to engoy it.

Keep in mind also you won't be able to do this if you are due to have a bowel movement... its best to time it 1 hour to 4 hours after one until you get to know yourself.

And actually simoneagie isn't too far off on that one... if he knows the actual mechanics as well you both can enjoy it better. When I first married my wife siad she would if I could teach her how to relax to do it... so I did exactly that... learned what it took, taught her and now she loves it... and actually comes asking for it at times.


I will also note that we are married... and monogamous so neither of us has any disease... and 17 years later no hemoroids either.

Maybe I am weird but I do love anal sex. It took sometime however and it is not for everyone. Everyone is giving you great advice. I would say lots and lots of lube, don't be ashamed of using a lot. Also you have to be turned on, it helps to relax. My first time I had split a bottle of wine with my lover and it got us in the mood:) Two ways for positioning in the beginning are laying down on your side and is laying down behind you. I feel as if this was the least painful way for penetration. Also you have to go SLOW. And breathe and make sure that despite the man being in "power" with anal sex, YOU are the one who says how fast, slow, deep etc. and your word is LAW. ANother way which helps me out is having the man behind me doggystyle and instead of him coming forawrd to me, I move back onto his penis. This way, I am able to control the speed and depth. You just have to watch out for how excited they can get and the natural response is to start pumping away.
I hope that this helps. If at anytime you realize it is not your thing stop. Sex is only good and fun when it is comfortable and not stepping past personal boundaries.

Might not be appropriate, but you can tell him the following joke.

A man broke into the bedroom of a couple and the man whispered something in the wife's ear. The husband says, "Do whatever he asks" so we don't get hurt. The wife says to the husband "He wants you".

Anal sex is fantastic... don't knock it. Anyone who does is missing out on one of the joys in life. And its fun for both parties... not just one.

Hey, I've done it. Just can't do it now. Experience it while you can.

There are certain products available at sex stores like special lubes and what not

Maximus - Lubricant - EdenFantasys

If you don't enjoy it though tell your husband and I'll bet he'll understand

Certainly try lots of lube. It takes time to learn how to relax enough but it's worth it. I've gotten to the point I actually ask for it.

I agree, the number one key is you must use a lot of lubrication.

I hope this isn't too graphic, but I have also heard that an anal plug can be used to prepare the anus for the act of penetration. Anal plugs are much smaller than an actual penis, but I was told that they do help relax the sphincter, and stretch the anus, which allows for easier penile penetration.

I was told to insert the anal plug before foreplay, let it stay in for a while, sometimes up to an hour before penetration. She says she relaxes on the bed during foreplay, all the while the anal plug is inserted, and then when they are ready for the act itself, he removes the plug and inserts the real thing.

Worth a try.

Anal sex is great every once in a while. Your partner has to be very respectful of your needs in the process.

My boyfriend liked doing it every once in a while and I stress that because I think if someone wants to do it all the time they think it feels better than vaginal sex.

He just liked the thrill of it because it is tabboo.

He did say he didn't like it better than vaginal sex, which made me feel better about doing it in the first place.

Hello:

I'm not sure what an anal plug is, but a finger works pretty good too. Frankly, it's even BETTER, because if he's into your anus, he's going to WANT his fingers and his tongue in there too.

If he's REALLY into it like that, you WILL be too. Promise!

excon

I couldn't agree more. If he's really into it AND really cares about you enough to help you ease into it you won't be able to help but like it.

Another thing to try is let him try penetration in the doggystyle position, this enables you to pull away and also gives you both (especially you) fairly easy access for cliteral stimulation. This will really help you get into it.

Above all, RELAX, don't think about the taboo parts and enjoy!

Yeah, it sounds gross, but that was the first time I actually enjoyed anal sex.

My boyfriend prepped me by licking around the anus and tickling me with his lips. He didn't lick the actual anus.

He did that for a good five minutes and it went in like I never thought could be possible.