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So I have "a friend"... she wants to know.... how do you know if you're a lesbian? If you fantasize about women during sex... or during "alone time"... or notice yourself checking women out are you a lesbian. Seriously, this "friend of mine" tells me that she can't orgasm without fantasizing about women or watching lesbian porn.
[quote=csquared]So I have "a friend"... she wants to know.... how do you know if you're a lesbian? If you fantasize about women during sex... or during "alone time"... or notice yourself checking women out are you a lesbian. Seriously, this "friend of mine" tells me that she can't orgasm without fantasizing about women or watching lesbian porn.[/QUOTE
She may just be curious and really without taking actually living out the fantasy will not know if she is indeed gay or bi.
she just finds women attractive and there is nothing wrong with that at all. if she was in deep deep love with the guy she was having sex with or the guy knew what he was doing whe wouldn't need to fantasize about women
if she was in deep deep love with the guy she was having sex with or the guy knew what he was doing whe wouldn't need to fantasize about women
oh "she" loves him. That's why she's still with him and she still has sex with him. She didn't notice how strong the attraction was until the past 6 months maybe. She's been with this guy for 3 years. She's always known that she's attracted to women, it's been stronger lately. She loves him and plans on staying with him though.
she just finds women attractive and there is nothing wrong with that at all. if she was in deep deep love with the guy she was having sex with or the guy knew what he was doing whe wouldn't need to fantasize about women
I highly doubt it has ANYTHING to do with the guy not knowing what he is doing. The girl in question obviously has some desires that need to be explored and some questions as to her own sexual desires and tendencies.
The answers will not be found if some exploration be it physical or mental, is done.
I think there is only one person who can answer this question hun and that is "ur friend". Having fantasies about women does not make you gay. I once saw a study that found that most women were just as aroused by lesbien porn as the were by straight porn. This is a safe fantasy because it doesnt come with the same guilt as fantasizing about another man. You are not comparing him to somebody else and so their seems to be no infidelity there. I use it myself with my own partner, often incorporating him in the situation and he knows this. Looking at women can also be about envy. When I see a young girl with a flat tummy or blue eyes in the street I look. But that is more because thay are features I find to be attractive about a woman, but dont have. When I was younger I thought theses things might make me gay (I even experimented a little), but over time I realised that I never have any romantic thoughts about women. I never picture having a relationship with a woman and my picture of the future is definatly with my partner.
You need to ask "ur friend" if this is all it is. After all some bi sexual tendencies is not a problem is it, just more people to love. It would not mean that you have to leave your partner, because as you say, you love him. Try telling him about these fantasies, he may like them. As long as you reasure him you will not leave him for a woman he may enjoy sharing this with you. Not many guys get to watch girl on girl porn with their girlfriends.
This is a safe fantasy because it doesnt come with the same guilt as fantasizing about another man. You are not comparing him to somebody else and so their seems to be no infidelity there.
wow you are so right. thanks!!!!!! it all makes sense now
I think there is only one person who can answer this question hun and that is "ur friend". Having fantasies about women does not make you gay. I once saw a study that found that most women were just as aroused by lesbien porn as the were by straight porn. This is a safe fantasy because it doesnt come with the same guilt as fantasizing about another man. You are not comparing him to somebody else and so their seems to be no infidelity there. I use it myself with my own partner, often incorporating him in the situation and he knows this. Looking at women can also be about envy. When I see a young girl with a flat tummy or blue eyes in the street I look. But that is more because thay are features I find to be attractive about a woman, but dont have. When I was younger I thought theses things might make me gay (I even experimented a little), but over time I realised that I never have any romantic thoughts about women. I never picture having a relationship with a woman and my picture of the future is definatly with my partner.
You need to ask "ur friend" if this is all it is. After all some bi sexual tendencies is not a problem is it, just more people to love. It would not mean that you have to leave your partner, because as you say, you love him. Try telling him about these fantasies, he may like them. As long as you reasure him you will not leave him for a woman he may enjoy sharing this with you. Not many guys get to watch girl on girl porn with their girlfriends.
Wrong, cheating is cheating be it with the same or opposite sex
I have this prob, i fantasize about women,im very curious, i have been for 7 yrs, i have a hubby of 6 yrs he knows about this, i have never acted upon it, if your friend feels strongly about it then she needs to try it!
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