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    confusedchick's Avatar
    confusedchick Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 30, 2009, 06:14 PM
    He rather watch porn
    Does any one now a couples counsler?
    confusedchick's Avatar
    confusedchick Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Jan 30, 2009, 06:19 PM
    Blocking porn
    How do I block porn from my PC
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #3

    Jan 30, 2009, 06:23 PM

    Disconnect it from the Internet.

    Seriously. If you find a surefire way, let everyone else know.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #4

    Jan 31, 2009, 10:36 AM

    As far as a couples' counselor, you can find one in your local yellow pages.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #5

    Jan 31, 2009, 04:10 PM

    A porn addict finds the desire for sexual bliss attached to porn, not a real female.

    Move on, don't waste any time with an addict.

    Good luck for future happiness, :)
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #6

    Feb 1, 2009, 02:13 PM
    Do you watch soap Operas? Read Romance Novels?

    Will you give those up too?


    Personally There is less than ZERO indications of Porn addiction in this thread contrary to what a few people think... (no details and little information)

    And yes there are some women so insecure with themselves that they can't stand the thought of a man doing what comes naturally.
    confusedchick's Avatar
    confusedchick Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Feb 2, 2009, 06:10 PM
    First of all,smoothy I don't mind the porn I would watch it with him but when you rather wack off than have the real thing, the girl you want to marry there is a problem
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #8

    Feb 3, 2009, 06:09 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by confusedchick View Post
    first of all,smoothy I don't mind the porn I would watch it with him but when you rather wack off than have the real thing, the girl you want to marry there is a problem

    Perhaps if you gave more information than you gave in the original post or its follow-up?

    Based on the post you made we have to guess at everything... yeah, I'd rather watch porn than stick my hand in hot grease... yeah I'd rather watch pron then sit and listen to a woman complaining abuot everything... yeah I'd rather watch porn than hit my thumb with a hammer.


    See my point. None of us can read minds so its important to be conciese and provide plenty of details (leaving out names of course).

    You don't go to the Doctor and just say "I'm not feeling good" or "it hurts" but not give him any more information or the rest or the story because he is never going to have an idea what's wrong.
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    confusedchick Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Feb 3, 2009, 06:57 AM

    Ok, I see. Well my situation is this... getting married soon, been together 3 years and we love each other a lot, I know he does ,every other part of our relatinship is great, he cooks for me he takes very good care of me and vice versa. He rather masterbate with internet porn than have the real thing. We have discussed it and he says he sorry he is just lazy and selfish. We are looking for a sex therapist. Know any? Any advice? How can porn be better than the real thing?
    HKitty's Avatar
    HKitty Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Feb 5, 2009, 04:59 PM
    I guess you and I have the same problem, When I meet my husband we used to see each other only on the weekends, so we had sex Friday sat and sun, This lasted for about 3 months, then I stated to stay over so the sex was only on sat because he was beat up from the week days work, you know... Then a year later we got married. Sex when down to once a month then every 3 months and so on... Now going on my 4th month!!
    Hes little secret he masturbates every morning when I go to work with he help of his porn DVD collection that of course I knew about before we got married and he decided to keep around. He his a wonderful man treats me like a princess I love him and I know he loves me too, But what is going on how can a person rather play with himself that have the actual person a live person. I also masturbate and I feel just plain empty when I am done. I do not understand his. I have talked to him about it but he tell me no honey I just tired from work La La La what ever!! I am so upset I would just burn those than DVD's I am just afraid of what would happen with our relationship... HELP!! :(:mad:
    confusedchick's Avatar
    confusedchick Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Feb 5, 2009, 06:28 PM
    Girl I feel you , I was not aware of this problem,I figured he masterbates all guys do but when it takes the place of you it really hurts you and makes you feel like . I discussed it with him and we are going to seek help before we get married. I;m sorry you are going through this also, let me know if there is anything I can do
    Labello's Avatar
    Labello Posts: 13, Reputation: 2
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    #12

    Feb 9, 2009, 11:40 AM

    MOVE ON. This will always be a problem with him. It's an addiction and he will always battle with it. Don't do this to yourself.
    HKitty's Avatar
    HKitty Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Feb 10, 2009, 01:05 PM

    CCHick I don not want to use the confused word because you and I know the only ones confused that they can make a decision of what is real or not are our guys... I am really glad you are going to seek help. I wish my husband would agree to seek help. We have talked about it but he said "this is just normal " I have a lot of stress at work things would get better... OK now going on 4 months now and no sex!! But of course he does his little hand job thing. He thinks this is normal. I wish I could find a good teraphist here in FL, Miami but I do not know of any and of course embarrassed about this situation.
    I do not understand how a man can replace a real woman over the hand and some porn. This is a terrible situation :(
    HKitty's Avatar
    HKitty Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    Feb 10, 2009, 01:08 PM

    Let me know how it goes and good luck to you both. :)
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #15

    Feb 10, 2009, 01:13 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by HKitty View Post
    CCHick I don not want to use the confused word because you and I know the only ones confused that they can make a decision of what is real or not are our guys.............. I am really glad you are going to seek help. I wish my husband would agree to seek help. We have talked about it but he said "this is just normal " I have a lot of stress at work things would get better.........OK now going on 4 months now and no sex!!!! but of course he does his little hand job thing. He thinks this is normal. I wish I could find a good teraphist here in FL, Miami but I do not know of any and of course embarassed about this situation.
    I do not understand how a man can replace a real woman over the hand and some porn. This is a terrible situation :(
    Because his hand and some porn don't get mad at him about it, don't require "cuddle time", can be done in minutes without worrying about someone else's experience, don't nag, don't b!tch, don't whine, don't complain, and don't make demands of him.

    Honestly--if it's THAT much a problem for you, then LEAVE. End of story.

    If you stay with him after trying to make things work and meet on middle ground, then you have NO RIGHT to complain about your situation.

    In other words--make your decision on what you will and will not tolerate, talk to him about it, then decide whether your love is greater than your sex drive and then choose whether to leave or stay. If you stay, you have to LIVE WITH IT, NO COMPLAINTS.
    HKitty's Avatar
    HKitty Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
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    #16

    Feb 12, 2009, 05:50 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Synnen View Post
    Because his hand and some porn don't get mad at him about it, don't require "cuddle time", can be done in minutes without worrying about someone else's experience, don't nag, don't b!tch, don't whine, don't complain, and don't make demands of him.

    Honestly--if it's THAT much a problem for you, then LEAVE. End of story.

    If you stay with him after trying to make things work and meet on middle ground, then you have NO RIGHT to complain about your situation.

    In other words--make your decision on what you will and will not tolerate, talk to him about it, then decide whether your love is greater than your sex drive and then choose whether or not to leave or stay. If you stay, you have to LIVE WITH IT, NO COMPLAINTS.
    You are so right... He just wants to watch that garbage and do his thing and get it over with. End of story. I know he has a big problem. The sad part is he his a wonderful man, The only thing I can complain about it's the Porn/hand thing... I am devastated...
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #17

    Feb 13, 2009, 07:12 AM

    As a guy speaking, and a guy that likes to view porn... my hand is a very poor substitute for a woman. Meaning I will take the woman every time... well, almost every time... I've dated exceptions to that rule before... wife is not an exception however. Thus Rosey Palmer and her sisters have been mighty lonely for a lot of years.
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