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    confusedchick's Avatar
    confusedchick Posts: 6, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 29, 2009, 06:59 PM
    he doesn' t want to have sex with me
    I'm a 30yr old female who has been with my fiancé 3yrs, we haven't had sex in months, he has no interst in it but yet I find porn on my PC. I ask him if its me he says no he loves me and is attracted to me but I feel unattractive and unwanted. We are to be married this year but I want a sex life.. I know what everyone is thinking ,he's not a cheater he has good values and I trust him. What's the problem iwant to dress sexy for him but I have been regected so much I don't even want to make a move anymore,I'm good looking I work out I don't get it. Help please.
    MatMatt22's Avatar
    MatMatt22 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Jan 29, 2009, 07:27 PM

    Honey I feel you. My man and I went from having this great sex life to not having sex in over a month but he still watches porn and jacks off?? It makes me lose myself confidence and I love him but I'm so sexually frustrated its not even funny! Sorry I don't know what to tell you but if you find an answer please tell me
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Jan 29, 2009, 09:57 PM

    In both your cases the lack of sex is a symptom of greater issue, that needs to be addressed. Start talking about it.
    uhhleesha's Avatar
    uhhleesha Posts: 105, Reputation: 21
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    #4

    Jan 29, 2009, 10:46 PM

    You're going to have to talk about it. Without getting too emotional about it,tell him how you feel right now, and what you need. Communication is the key to a great relationship, including a sex life.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #5

    Jan 30, 2009, 05:58 AM

    Wouldn't hurt to put a porn blocker on your computer, either.
    KellyAlexander's Avatar
    KellyAlexander Posts: 37, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
    		  
    #6

    Jan 30, 2009, 08:28 AM

    Honey you know the answer to your problem and only you can save yourself. At least don't get married anytime soon... give yourself a chance to build up the strength to do what's right... it will be much harder after you're married... good luck sweetie...
    HKitty's Avatar
    HKitty Posts: 10, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Feb 5, 2009, 05:04 PM

    Confusedchick I hope you read my posting and get back to me, I am also going through the same situation...
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #8

    Feb 6, 2009, 06:32 AM
    You both need to be in couples counseling before you make the mistake of getting married.
    Ren6's Avatar
    Ren6 Posts: 539, Reputation: 121
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    #9

    Feb 6, 2009, 07:41 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by smoothy View Post
    You both need to be in couples councelling before you make the mistake of getting married.
    +1. Don't just think that this will all work out. You need counseling, pronto. This is a big read flag, you need to heed it now. Some guys get addicted to porn- to the point where women with natural breasts, etc. seem less attractive than the perfect, air-brushed models in porn. Good luck...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #10

    Feb 6, 2009, 07:52 AM

    I would be better in bed if my wife paid me like a porn star.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
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    #11

    Feb 6, 2009, 08:02 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    I would be better in bed if my wife paid me like a porn star.
    Well, if you were a porn star, you'd be VERY used to taking directions for sex, anyway.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #12

    Feb 7, 2009, 09:30 PM

    Time to face reality... not get married, girl.

    You can't see it from where you are now, but life gets miserable fast if you marry the wrong guy for the wrong reasons.
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