Girlfriend trouble and sex trouble...

Fr_Chuck · Apr 11, 2012, 03:35 AM

Most likely she will be back with her ex the day he gets out of jail. In jail or prison they have people put money on what is basicly a phone card ( a special account) they can make phone calls on regular basis. In some Federal Prisons, they have access to special email accounts to use.

smoothy · Apr 11, 2012, 05:07 AM

I think you already know the answer....she kept you arround as the temporary chief backscratcher, while the Permanent cheif backscratcher is away. You know that she's planning on with going back to him when he gets out. Take her at her word. Its time to find someone else, and do it now on your schedule ...rather than on her schdule.

Cat1864 · Apr 11, 2012, 05:21 AM

This may seem harsh. But take it as a wake up call.

No she doesn't love you. You said it yourself, she is using you. She tells you she loves you just to keep you coming back for more. She wants a body instead of a vibrator and you are providing it.

Get out of the relationship. Let her figure out how to get herself off instead of blaming you.

Don't play games of 'using her back'. It makes you sound like an immature male who can't accept that he is as obsessed with her as she is about her boyfriend in jail.

Using someone until you find another person is not healthy for you. You need to get out. Go full No Contact. Do not contact her Do not accept contact from her. Block her phone number. Delete messages/texts/e-mails. Get your life back on track instead of playing her game.

Give yourself time to get over her. Heal. Let the baggage go and move forward with your life. When you are ready, you will meet someone who wants to build a relationship with you. Build up your confidence in yourself so that you will be a healthy and stable partner for that person.

Walk away from her drama. Stop being her toy. Give yourself the tools and time to heal.

You will be much happier and probably won't have any problems of a sexual nature in your next relationship.

CravenMorhead · Apr 11, 2012, 07:17 AM

So there was a group of monks in history that proved their faith through self-torture. Their beliefs were so strong that they would suffer as proof of their conviction.

I am drawing an analogy here. Do you see what it is?

You're torturing yourself with this woman. You don't love her you lust her. Dump her. Get away from her. Stop thinking about her. Just... stop. For the love of your own sanity.

You've all but convinced yourself that there is a happy future with her and that isn't going to happen. Give up. Really.

It is like pulling off a bandaid. It is going to hurt but in the end it will be better.

Changler · Apr 11, 2012, 08:58 AM

worst part of it all, shes lying to the guy in jail and saying I am just a gay friend because he was bugging out that she was with another dude. But she "cleared" it up with him with a lie... I was gunna write to him myself just to tell him because I think he deserves to know but Idk if its the right thing to do or not?
**I'll also try and break it off with her today, it must be lust and not love, I hope. I'll tell her that in the break up.

Changler · Apr 11, 2012, 09:14 AM

To cat also, I thought about her using me instead of a vibrator, but then I was like why doesnt she just find another guy to satisfy her if I am so bad at it (now). I was also out of a job for a month and half and she payed for me when we went out, not alot but she helped so Idk I still believes she really does like me for those 2 good reasons.

smoothy · Apr 11, 2012, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Changler

worst part of it all, shes lying to the guy in jail and saying I am just a gay friend because he was bugging out that she was with another dude. But she "cleared" it up with him with a lie... I was gunna write to him myself just to tell him because I think he deserves to know but Idk if its the right thing to do or not?
**I'll also try and break it off with her today, it must be lust and not love, I hope. I'll tell her that in the break up.

Don't just TRY to do it.........DO IT! Any woman that refered to me as gay is a female I'd treat like Nuclear waste and get as far away as possible as fast as possible.

Cat1864 · Apr 11, 2012, 09:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Changler

To cat also, I thought about her using me instead of a vibrator, but then I was like why doesnt she just find another guy to satisfy her if I am so bad at it (now). I was also out of a job for a month and half and she payed for me when we went out, not alot but she helped so Idk I still believes she really does like me for those 2 good reasons.

She may be trying to convince herself she isn't using you or she may be using you as a 'whipping boy' for the person she is really upset with.

Do you know what a 'whipping boy' is? For awhile, in some places (primarily royal households) the higher-born children were not allowed to be disciplined. They had another person, usually another child, stand in for them. The 'whipping boy' would be educated with the royal child, but he would also be whipped for the misdeeds of the other child.

Don't ignore the warning signs of being used. If she will lie to someone else and his family, then she will lie to you.

Changler · Apr 11, 2012, 12:27 PM

How should I break it off with her, should I say you have to choose me or him right now? Or just not even give her the choice because if she chooses me I'll feel a hole go right through my heart. If I just end it because I can't deal with it anymore.....

Girlfriend trouble and sex trouble...

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