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Home > Family & People > Adult Sexuality   »   my gf doesn't want as much sex as me

 
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Old Dec 2, 2007, 10:30 PM
sant55
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my gf doesn't want as much sex as me

Is there anything else I can do for my gf who doesn't want as much sex as me?
how can i make her feel hot and ready?
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Old Dec 2, 2007, 10:40 PM   #2  
goelpunit
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hi tell in more details ....
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Old Dec 2, 2007, 10:52 PM   #3  
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ok, i want to know how can i make her hot? she allows me to kiss, suck her boobs, caress her body... but when i want to have sex, she doesn't wish to be ready. i want to know how can i make her hot? are there some special parts of her body where i can kiss or suck and make her feel hot?
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Old Dec 2, 2007, 11:51 PM   #4  
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Dear Sant,

After reading ur msg., I think she will be worried about pregnancy. You tell her u use all precautions during intercourse. Prepare first her mentally to do sex after physical. Take her firstly in confidence. Try this you will get successed very soon ...

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tarunjoshi agrees: u r right
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Old Dec 3, 2007, 12:06 AM   #5  
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Thanks goelpunit. im sure she isnt worried abt pregnancy (because of her physical condition). we had sex 3 times before. she is a divorced lady. but she is not participatory and takes sex as burden. i want to know what kind of foreplay can make her ready again? she isnt willing to hv sex again, thats the problem.
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Old Dec 3, 2007, 04:04 AM   #6  
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She isn't willing/ready to have sex, and you're trying to pressure her into it?

I don't blame her. I wouldn't give it up to you either. Bet it looks to her like you only want sex!

If she's not ready MENTALLY, nothing you can do is going to change that. Try being patient, loving, kind, and gentle.

Also--try not to communicate by private message on these boards. Since you responded in a message to someone, the rest of us have no idea of any details you've only given ONE person.
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Old Dec 3, 2007, 06:36 PM   #7  
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Thank u very much Synnen. I think you are correct. she has told me to be patient. but how long i can wait??? and i think i hv been loving, kind, and gentle to her, thanks again.
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Old Dec 3, 2007, 08:03 PM   #8  
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does she have orgasms? scour the threads here and there are LOTS of women who are not satisfied.

that not an attack on you... but its possible sex is not appealing to her for a lot of reasons. past sexual abuse, past sexual disappointment, physical or emotional stress decreasing libido, etc...

can you get her to orgasm through oral sex, making it all about her?

sensuality isnt the same as sexuality, though they should be connected. she just might need more sensuality and less sexuality. the maddening thing and the great thing about sex is that a sexual roadblock can be hell to get past... but once you have a few "wins" you might be past it for good for the most part...

so... id focus on her as much as you can. latest sex/sensual book i read was "she comes first"... stresses taking you time with a woman, and even though i thought i was a patient guy, turns out i was still forcing things sooner than needed... even when giving oral.

we guys are just wired differently mostly. so making it about her for a while might pay you dividends in the long run. and if it doesnt, then you know you did your part and tried to meet halfway.

sexual compatability is something that should be looked at and thought about.
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Old Dec 3, 2007, 09:01 PM   #9  
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How long should you wait?

Until SHE is ready. That might be after marriage.

No matter how patient you think you're being, for many women, sex isn't a goal in a relationship. It's nice, it's great--but not as good as being close to your boyfriend/husband/whoever. And the thing is--once you HAVE sex, it's really hard to go back to NOT having sex.

Sex isn't a reward for you doing everything right for her, being patient and kind and loving and whatever.

Sex is, for many people, an expression of love that is more fulfilling ONLY if the rest of the relationship is solid and trusting.

So...if you want to know how to show her THAT--back off. Don't bring up having sex. Don't push her towards sex. When she says stop, stop completely, with no "but I NEED yous" or "but I love you baby" or "it hurts to go unfulfilled as a man" or dirty looks, or heavy sighs, or whatever else might make her feel guilty for saying no to sex. Just stop, and be okay with stopping.

Look at it this way--you're getting all the REST of that sexual play, right? Make the PLAYING the goal, not the sex, not the orgasm. Just the feelign good together, being comfortable together.
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Old Dec 3, 2007, 09:41 PM   #10  
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I think synnen is right.
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