My opinion is that feeling nothing or feeling pain when having intercourse is a psychological issue if a physician has examined you and told you there is nothing wrong with your genitals.
In addition, I feel that a woman has the ability to mature and grow her sexuality throughout her life if she is so motivated. Some women are motivated, some are not. Being motivated involves reading and practising and fantasizing....

We can go all the way to Eastern practices of orgasm and Mystical Experiences(which few can do).
No doubt about it, having an orgasm by self-stimulating the clitoris feels real good.
But, pain, girl!....for me, that is pathological and you have to get to the bottom of this misery right away. Call your obgyne today to rule out messed up genitals.