I'm beginning to think I'm not normal, or the average human being. I watched a show that spoke about "open marriages" and fantasizing.. and I was floored!! First I would like to say that's NUTZ..but what really gets me is fantasizing about others while making love to your partner. I can honestly say that I've never thought about others while being intimate, and it bothers me to think that its normal to do so! How could someone do that to another? It makes me want to spend my life alone to spare the heartache of knowing my man could be thinking of someone else while INSIDE of me! Is it wrong for me to be bothered by that? Cuz apparently the rest of the world thinks its normal. Is it really normal or an excuse to fullfill ones own selfish need. Our society is so sex saturated its as if that's the ONLY purpose in life..to bust a nut! And if it can't be with say Jessica simpson...well I can pretend my wife is her! K..to me that's wrong! The more I think about it the more frustrated I get! Back to open marriages..its all about people who can't commit and who have trouble with manogomy! So why get married? And furthermore I feel that if u have to fantasize about another while making love u should get out of that relationship and be with someone who always does it for you..it is possible to remain faithful both phys. And mentally..I can. But I guess I'm not. normal though! Anyone else feel like that? Or could someone school me on this issue please..!

JudyKayTee

Have you thought about sitting down with your husband and explaining to him the way you've explained this to me? It makes perfect sense, you're open and honest about how/why you feel the way you do. Would he sit and talk with you?

Princess J

We have talked about that.As a result of those months I have become hard on the surface learned a lot about myself returned to being my old teenage, defensive,irrational....and HoRmoNaL ways!I think me and my husband are pros when it comes to pushing people away at the worst of times!I've also noticed how we both get needy after good sex. Can't quite figure that out..fear, maybe? Those few months were brutal to us both like we lost each other there in that time and left each other out on an emotional limb...now were afraid of being let down again so we are hesitant..thus the distance its time we sit and talk about these fears again cuz its clear we still are suffering from them. Thank you judykaytee! It was connected!

JudyKayTee

I admire your honesty and clear eyes when you look at your situation. Wish I had advice but I think I've given all I have.

Please keep us informed - ?