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-   -   Engaging in Rough Sex without Hurting Her? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=129676)

  • Sep 14, 2007, 04:15 PM
    SubFreeze
    Engaging in Rough Sex without Hurting Her?
    Hello Everyone,
    I recently posted a thread titled Need to Pleasure Her Sexually, but I replied to that thread too many times and it became a bit difficult to follow. Also, I will be more specific and to-the-point in this thread.

    How can I engage in rough sex (or sorts) without hurting my girlfriend? Maybe not even necessarily rough sex, as the sex that my girlfriend and I usually have may be extraordinarily "soft" because of me. My lessons in sex involve PG-13ish and soft Rated-R romance comedy movies where people go into the bed, the camera turns away, and then they wake up in the morning cuddling. In other words, the sex that my girlfriend and I engage in is more like cuddling sex, because of me. She recently told me directly (I already gathered this personally) that she does not get turned on unless I am rougher with her. The only rough anything I have been with her is picking her up and tossing her into bed, which... well, isn't much.

    Please provide tips about rougher sex (that wouldn't hurt my girlfriend). Thank you.
  • Sep 14, 2007, 06:03 PM
    shygrneyzs
    Ask your girlfriend. She must know what she wants and in the degrees she wants the activities, or else she would not have brought it up. Rough to you may not be rough to me. Also, rough to me, might be kitten play to your girlfriend. Always best to go to your original source. If she cannot tell you exactly what she needs, then you two need to work on communication before engaging in "rough sex" where someone could get hurt, even though without intent to hurt.
  • Sep 14, 2007, 08:01 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Talk, let her tell you if it is getting too rough, or if she wants he different.
    If you are role playing have a key word that would be different that means stop.
  • Sep 15, 2007, 02:24 AM
    SubFreeze
    I doubt that I could hurt her with my style of "rough" sex, but we do have a keyword, just in case. And I have talked to her, and she has been very patient and rather specific about certain things, but I do not how to carry them out exactly. I don't want her telling me step-by-step what to do, such as "First, you hold me down and kiss me hard; second, you nibble on my neck," as that would be a bit too weird. Any suggestions about what I can do to engage in "rough sex?" I do not know about what goes on in the bedroom/closed doors and have never seen anyone have sex, so I'm a bit lost. Thanks.
  • Sep 16, 2007, 06:45 AM
    shygrneyzs
    How old are you? Are you old enough to rent an adult film? You and your girlfriend could do that together - go to the video store and look at the titles. I do not want to get very graphic here, because I don't know your age and also there are pre-teens on the site who browse topics. Other than that, I will not say more. You could also web search on your own - plenty of sites out there for you.
  • Sep 17, 2007, 12:41 PM
    smoothy
    I highly recommend making sure SHE wants this first. And if she doesn't either forget it or find a girlfriend that does.

    Once you have a willing partner that wants it you come up with a "Safe" word that means stop, and stop now. There is a very fine line between consensual rough sex and sexual assault.
  • Sep 17, 2007, 01:33 PM
    Ash123
    One word: RUN.

    Dude, I guarantee that she has a past (childhood/relationships etc.) that she is working through via... you.

    You sound sane and a bit too functional. There is nothing wong with rough sex, per se,
    But this is not an older couple role playing... this is a girl with issues that has her boyfriend going online to sort it.

    Yes, it is a "different" experience for you and all, but this is the tip of the iceberg.

    Remember the Titanic?

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