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We aren't open when talking about sex. She never says mum during. Oh, maybe an ocassional low hmmmm during. We both know I reach a climax, but I don't know if she does or even has. How do I approach her on this subject? What should I ask her? Like I said, she's not open about these sexual matters and I don't want to offend her. I'm so curious. Any suggestions.
I think we both like her riding. Recently, with her driving and me going with her cadence where the tip(maybe fist inch and a half of my penis) is entered and withdrawn completely, reinserted, withdrawn, and so on and so on...... my be stimulating her the most get the most reaction(not vocally) but action on her part. I'm on the small side and the amount of my penis being used in this scenario helps me last longer and her most animated. If I could just get a couple "yes, yes, yes" or something vocal in that manner, it would make me feel like things are "almost there. I may come out next time this is happening and say(as someone else suggested) "like that Honey?".
Very good Mr. C. Odds are she is just shy about being vocal, but I happen to know for a fact that if you are truely getting her off, she won't be able to keep her mouth shut. Go ahead, talk a little dirty to her...
I think the key issue here is communication. Even if you think she is shy, and you think that she did not have an open relationship with her parents about sexuality, she, just like everyone else has had thoughts about it during her puberty. So, what's preventing her from asking you or friends about their experiences?
You know that she is not going to stay in the 'closet' all her life, and if you intend on a future with her - you will need to eventually find out what her preferences are. This is called "discovering each other" and "communicating". If you don't bring up the subject this does not mean she will not be curious about it. It's your choice if you want her to learn more with you or through other informational input (i.e. friends, books, media, etc.)
Maybe it's still too early in your relationship (in your opinion) to gain the trust and openness that you both need to advance - because nobody keeps the same attitude about anything in life forever. We all learn more and more each day, and communicating our likes and dislikes are a very important part in all of our development.
Again, good luck.
The more you know, the better you grow! Never make total assumptions about another person, they change all the time.
Listen, people are reading too much into this. If you want to know if she is getting off, then just ask her.
And yes, if she is truely at her climax, some noise or indication of that sort will be made, whether it is from her breathing or vocals, you will know. But beware, women can and do fake orgasms.
You don' t need to do extra research and all that crap-women have a special spot they liked to be "rubbed"-that's it. So just rub it until she can't sit still (or quiet). Then you will know.
You don' t need to do extra research and all that crap-women have a special spot they liked to be "rubbed"-that's it. So just rub it until she can't sit still (or quiet). Then you will know.
hmmm... so this would explain all of the "i cant get off" posts that some women post here? women who dont know their own anatomy??? i dont think so. great sex is concerted by the stim of more than one spot on the body, including mental. OBVIOUSLY stim of the c1itoris goes a long way toward reaching that end and much of the time is a primary cause of reaching climax.
so yes, anatomy is pretty basic, but just because step one, two, and three work for you doesnt mean it works for all. i once dated a girl who HATED strong c1itoral stim. and then another who could practically get off in tight jeans. if simply rubbing that area is all that needed to be done, then why have i had to pay attention to the needs and wants of each lover to find out how to pleasure them?
so i think you're oversimplifying the issue...at least for some cases.
hmmm... so this would explain all of the "i cant get off" posts that some women post here? women who dont know their own anatomy??? i dont think so. great sex is concerted by the stim of more than one spot on the body, including mental. OBVIOUSLY stim of the c1itoris goes a long way toward reaching that end and much of the time is a primary cause of reaching climax.
so yes, anatomy is pretty basic, but just because step one, two, and three work for you doesnt mean it works for all. i once dated a girl who HATED strong c1itoral stim. and then another who could practically get off in tight jeans. if simply rubbing that area is all that needed to be done, then why have i had to pay attention to the needs and wants of each lover to find out how to pleasure them?
so i think you're oversimplifying the issue...at least for some cases.
"so i think you're oversimplifying the issue...at least for some cases"-I think people overreact on most of these cases. I'm not saying to this guy that this is the only way to do it, I'm simply suggesting something simple or easy for him to start off with, which I feel is what he would rather do-before getting "counseling" or whatever like everyone else tells him to do. And by all means, never in any of my posts did I ever say that-that is what worked for me. There are many things that work for me as well as others, but-as previously stated-it's a starter for someone who just asked for simple suggestions in the first place.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Depressed in MO
"so i think you're oversimplifying the issue...at least for some cases"-I think people overreact on most of these cases. I'm not saying to this guy that this is the only way to do it, I'm simply suggesting something simple or easy for him to start off with, which I feel is what he would rather do-before getting "counseling" or whatever like everyone else tells him to do. And by all means, never in any of my posts did I ever say that-that is what worked for me. There are many things that work for me as well as others, but-as previously stated-it's a starter for someone who just asked for simple suggestions in the first place.
"so this would explain all of the "i cant get off" posts that some women post here? women who dont know their own anatomy??? i dont think so."-By the way, these are women who specify that they have been sexually abused in their past, which very well likely justifies why they can't get off...
I can truthfully say that there is nothing simple about my sexuality and being approached as if it were led to a lot of failure before I began to understand that. And sexual failure is never fun. As I got more versed in the wide variances of the sexual world, I discovered there are others like me too - complicated. Now I do understand that for others, some others, it may be simple. But to think it is for everyone is either incredibly naive or short-sighted.
Why does everyone have to attack people about stupid **** on this site? The dude asked a simple question on how to get his girlfriend off, not about how to get psychotherapy or whatever it is that everyone else suggests (for the most part) I don't give a damn who agrees or disagrees with me, tell your thoughts to the original post, not your opinion on my suggestions because there are no wrong or right answers on here in the first place.
Thank you.
Why does everyone have to attack people about stupid **** on this site? The dude asked a simple question on how to get his girlfriend off, not about how to get psychotherapy or whatever it is that everyone else suggests (for the most part) I don't give a damn who agrees or disagrees with me, tell your thoughts to the original post, not your opinion on my suggestions because there are no wrong or right answers on here in the first place.
Thank you.
wow.
this site is an open forum, open to opinions AND disagreements. i learn more from contrary views than i do from people who say "yes i agree".
you are saying its simpler than we make it to be, and a few say its sometimes more complicated than that. thats it. but anything i post here might be disagreed with. thats ok with me.
this site is an open forum, open to opinions AND disagreements. i learn more from contrary views than i do from people who say "yes i agree".
you are saying its simpler than we make it to be, and a few say its sometimes more complicated than that. thats it. but anything i post here might be disagreed with. thats ok with me.
i hope its ok with you.
sure its ok with me, agreeing with someone and disagreeing with someone is fine, but some people's words are a little harsh in regards to the matter...that is all I am saying. you all have given me great advice, things I haven't wanted to hear and things that I liked to hear. but one thing I don't think anyone should put up with is someone else insulting them or their intelligence. I see people here insulting other people's spelling, or language or whatever and quite frankly-its ridiculous. In this case; however, I see people telling me that I'm wrong and that I don't know this or that. There are nicer ways to say things without flat out telling someone they don't know what they are talking about. Anyway, I'm not trying to start another post under the "I can't get my girlfriend off" post. I'm just saying lay off to those who are quick to judge my suggestions-not neccesarily my opinion.
Just do something that you KNOW pleasures her and right in the middle of it look at her and say "Yeah baby, how does that feel?" while you're still rubbing/licking whatever on her...That should get an answer out of her for you.
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