At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them
answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in
answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you
will be able to:
Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+
topics.
I have no one else I feel that I can ask. I have been married for 2 1/2 years and with him a total of 4. I feel that he is always pressuring me to have sex and 95% of the time it has to be with anal. I do not like it very much, but if I tell him I dont want to he just says that he is a "butt man and if I wont do it he will find someone who will." So pretty much I am guilted into it! So lately I have not been wanting to have sex at all, but I go through the motions just to make him tolerable otherwise he is verbally abusive and unreasonable. I have asked him to just lay off some and told him I dont like to be pressured but he tells me I need to just shut up and give in more. I am tired of all of the fighting. I have been in counselling for about 4 months and on antidepressants too. I am losing the love I have for him. Should I just give in more even though on average we have sex 3 or 4 times a week?
If both couples want and enjoy anal, then by all means that is thier thing, but only and only if both agree. If you don't want to, he has no resepct for you at all.
NEver , ever, ever have sex or do anything you don't want to.
you have to be strong with a person like this. he apparently only wants what he wants. if you dislike it then don't do it. dont back down. it appears it is a control thing and he wants you to be submissive. do you want to spend the rest of your life with a man like this?
Don't let him take control over you. Even though your married that does not mean that you have to feel like you owe this to him. You don't! He needs to respect you and if he can't do that then maybe you have alot of thinking to do between yalls marriage. Maybe there needs to be some sort of agreement between the both of you. Good luck! Best wishes to your marriage!
I think HE needs the counselling for his fetish that you don't like. How about you ask him to submit to you while you do him with a strap-on? To me he is trying to make you his submissive and you need to say "NO not until I WANT IT".
until he stops pestering you and YOU want it, then it will be your way or the highway for him.
if it continues, you may have to consider talking first then threatening divorce, thenif still no good then divorce him altogether.
I fear that he is too controlling and may go a little too posessive-watch him....
Time to possibly think about divorce. If he is pressuring you and talking to that way. Has he been in counseling as well? If not, maybe he should. Do not give in. My feeling is to get a divorce and break free as soon as possible or he will be even more controling down the road. I do not like advocating divorce until there is some form of counseling and seeing if things change with the help of counseling. If not, then It is time to get a divorce. Being obsessed with anal sex is twisted and gay in my opinion.
i have been in counseling by myself. the rest of the story is he was 25 and a virgin when i met him. he had watched alot of porn and he got rid of it when we were serious. for the first year he respected me. then we split up for six months because he went back to using drugs. then we got back together after he claimed he was sober. well of course he is not, but not hardcore just pot. i have asked him repeatedly to get help and i am not the type of person to give up easily. but in my mind sometimes it feels as if he is raping me. and i have been down that road in the past. he refuses help on one hand he says nothing is wrong with him and on the other hand he says he is broke and cant be fixed.
You can not fix him. The only one that can fix him is himself. You can be supportive if you want, but you yourself said that you feel like he is raping you.
Mental and physical abuse, girl......I know you are boiling inside, but you are all sugar and spice on the outside. This emotional situation is the breeding ground for mental illness.
No matter how afraid you are about being alone, you have to get rid of him.
Linear Mode
