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    lifenotwhatichose's Avatar
    lifenotwhatichose Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Sep 25, 2007, 03:11 PM
    Boyfriend looks at porn, doesn't know I know
    Hi. OK, my boyfriend goes through phases. Sometimes he wants sex every night, other times we go a week without it. Anyway, I was looking in my computers internet history and I saw several porn sites (this just started a week ago). We have been together for 2 years and he has never been into porn (we tried watching it once together, but he couldn't get into it). I didn't say anything and decided to check it everyday to see if there is more (while I am at work). There has been new porn everyday (now going on a week)! This really makes me feel very insecure because I had a baby a few months ago and my body is definitely not the same (not to mention our love life is stressed due to our baby). I just feel like now that my body isn't the same, he isn't attracted to me anymore and has to look else where. It wouldn't be so weird if he had been into porn before. I just don't know why this started all of a sudden. Is it me? What do you think?
    americangayboy's Avatar
    americangayboy Posts: 220, Reputation: 38
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    #2

    Sep 25, 2007, 07:37 PM
    Your fears are probably unfounded. Men like to look at porn. He probably didn't look at porn before out of respect for you, but when you watched it together, he assumed you were okay with it. Also, he was probably not into it when you watched it together because he felt awkward.

    If it really bothers you, let him know. It can't hurt.
    RustyFairmount's Avatar
    RustyFairmount Posts: 165, Reputation: 40
    Junior Member
     
    #3

    Sep 25, 2007, 09:21 PM
    Maybe he's had some fantasies that he's afraid to tell you about. Check out the porn he's downloaded. If you see a theme, work it into your bedroom. Have fun with it. Surprise him. The previous poster is right on the awkward bit. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Just communicate. That's everything.
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #4

    Sep 26, 2007, 11:52 AM
    Keep in mind many of the Web based porn sites propagate malware, spyware and can literally hijack your web browser with popups. It only takes one visit to the wrong site on a machine without protection. I recommend making sure you run a good anti-spyware program as well as a good antivirus program. It can look like that's all he does when he wasn't initiating anything, Or in any case just went to a single site.

    That said I agree with the previous posters as well.
    Telvin82's Avatar
    Telvin82 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Oct 3, 2007, 04:16 AM
    I think I will have to agree with americangayboy - If you love him and you are curious on his moves - have an open communication with him. By doing this you might feel secure and if he is into new moves then Y not - give it a try and have fun...
    Just be happy he is into Porn not any other women - which will be even worst... :)
    bigjd's Avatar
    bigjd Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    Oct 3, 2007, 03:52 PM
    Talk to him about this in a calmly manner, I'm pretty sure you guys can get to a understanding about this.
    pepper jean's Avatar
    pepper jean Posts: 5, Reputation: 2
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    #7

    Oct 4, 2007, 08:16 AM
    Who doesn't like sex on the TV or in books or mags and I am a female speaking. Your boyfriend has always been into porn he just couldn't admit for fear you would burn him at the stake. Have open and understanding conversations always and don't make each other fill stupid or weird for being honest and open we are all freaks in our own minds and that's just the truth so go easy on him and enjoy each other
    Ash123's Avatar
    Ash123 Posts: 1,793, Reputation: 305
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    #8

    Oct 4, 2007, 08:46 AM
    if i had a dollar for every girl who has stated had this worry....

    Don't worry. If your sex life is normal and he is attentive and respectful...
    Don't fear. In fact, I would make a joke of it: "i saw some hot sites on there big boy"

    --and make it public and less tabboo and have fun with it... He's normal and so are you.
    IF it is a small part of his life - like he scans it now and then - whatever... if he isn't into
    Sex and stays in all night - then say it's a problem and gently confont it... but for now, don't panic - talk...
    lella87's Avatar
    lella87 Posts: 21, Reputation: 2
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    #9

    Mar 19, 2008, 03:37 PM
    I just had this problem with my boyfriend.. and he said the only reason he watched it once without me is because he likes the fantasy of the girls dressing up and playing role reversal and was to embarrassed to ask me if id try it with him..

    Just ask him what he likes about the girls in porn. Could be the positions, costumes, makeup etc... this could be a new way to find out his NEW fantasties (im guessing after 2 years they would have changed) and add some spice into your sex life! like trying something new!. Don't be afraid to ask

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