I've always thought that maybe I'm just a 'late bloomer', I'll have sex when I'm ready and I'll find someone when I'm older and all that jazz; but now I'm not so sure.

I'm going to be twenty one in less than a month and I've never had a boyfriend, not because I've had no interest but because I've never been comfortable with the thought of having to have sex, I thought it was just down to my own insecurities and that I'd get over them once I started to trust people but now that I really think about it I've never been sexually attracted to anyone, I can be attracted to them aesthetically and want to touch them in a non sexual way, but I don't want to do anything else. I don't know, I do get aroused but I've never had any sexual attraction to anyone.

I've heard of the term 'heteromantic' which I think means someone can have heterosexual romantic feelings for someone without the sexual bit, and I think that's what I am; I want to hug, kiss and cuddle someone and do all of those romantic things but I'm not interested in sex.

I'm really not sure, there's so many terms and titles for things that I just don't know; I know people say these things don't need a title but it would make my life easier if I could give people an answer when they ask me about this stuff.

If you are looking to define yourself for others its easier when you understand yourself, and know what you are defining. I think in time when you are more sure and have a better grasp of your thoughts, action, and feelings, then it hard to articulate yourself.

You are a works in the making, so no need to put yourself into a category yet until you know what it is, and since most of the people around you are finding themselves too, don't be thrown by their definition of themselves either. I think it's a pretty normal thing for young 20's to be looking for their identity, and with so many option, confusion should be expected.

Or do you just want to sound cool, and in control?

Be yourself and take one day at a time. You are better off than people that jump from one relationship to another. Focus on your goals and the right somebody will come into your life at the right time

That does sound a lot like how many asexuals describe themselves. I've done a fair bit of reading on the subject, identifying as demisexual (somewhere between sexual and asexual), so I understand how little information there is out there.

If you haven't already, you should check out asexuality.org. They have a lot of information that may be helpful, and forums where you can talk to people who may be able to help you better understand and identify your feelings.

The number one myth about asexuals is that they aren't interested in, or capable of in having, romantic relationships. That's not true. Just like there are people who have sex but never relationships, there are people who have relationships but never sex. There is nothing wrong with wanting one, both, or neither.

Good luck ^_^