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chishikineko · Sep 19, 2006, 11:59 AM

My bestfriends niece is one month pregnant and fourteen years old the father of her baby is fourteen as well, my fiancé and I have talked about adopting their baby only because we both know that she and the father can not take care of that baby and I know for a fact that it will not be safe in the house or that family. I also know that she would not want to give up the baby what's so ever, I have been told that the father is having second thoughts already, my bestfriends niece has gone to be self destructive since finding out about the baby I've been told that she's gotten arrested for driving her mothers car, when told that she could end up giving birth in jail she shrugged it off as nothing. What I would like to know is if there is a way my fiancé and I could adopt the baby even though the mother won't give it up nor with her grandmother (who has custody of her) won't force her to give it up? I'd like to make it anonymous as well for the baby's safety.

CaptainForest · Sep 19, 2006, 03:08 PM

No there is no way.

If she is fit and her mother is fit to raise children, then you can't make them give up their children.

All you can do is let them know you would be interested.

If you were to get pregnant yourself today, should you be forced to give up your child against your will? You say no, why? Because you think you are mature enough? Old enough? Well, a 14 year old (and her mother) can have the same reaction their child.

chishikineko · Sep 20, 2006, 04:34 AM

Her mother does not want her to keep the baby and has told her so the last three time the 14 thought she was pregnant, the child is not fit (see quote)

Originally Posted by chishikineko

my best friend niece has gone to be self destructive since finding out about the baby I've been told that she's gotten arrested for driving her mothers car, when told that she could end up giving birth in jail she shrugged it off as nothing.

She missed more then a month of school just because she thought the kids where talking about her, and she claimed her uncle tried to rape her, but the only reason she ACTUALLY SAID NO was because of her boyfriend. Yes she has had sex with her uncle a friend of her bet her 20 dollars to do so and a cousin. She and her mother both have a history of sexual abuse. I know for a fact that she will not be able to handle a baby her mother could but she won't because she will want her daughter to take care of it. The fourteen year old is under the idea that her 13 yr old sister well help her as well, this is the same 13 yr old that sleeps with night light when she does sleep at night, she's so scared of the dark she doesn't sleep unless it's day time.

collinsmom · Sep 22, 2006, 06:16 AM

Wow! This sounds like a bad situation all around. I really feel sorry for the baby and the mother-to-be. It sounds like the mother-to-be is screaming for help, whether she knows it or not. The only thing I can recommend is to call Child Protective Services if you see that the baby is not being cared for properly. It's difficult for me to hear these stories since I have not been able to have a child myself (however we do now have a beautiful 4 year old boy through open adoption, we were truly blessed with him and his birthfamily! ) I will keep them in my prayers.

s_cianci · Sep 25, 2006, 07:58 PM

It's not likely that any judge would force her to give up her own child so you and your fiancé could adopt him/her. Regardless of how unfit she may be, courts are extremely protective of the parents' "rights." They say they want what's best for the child, but that's a lot of crap in most cases ; they're usually more concerned with making the parents happy, so long as the child is kept out of immediate physical danger.

christie79 · Mar 9, 2011, 01:49 PM

I would love to adopt this baby. I am a single 31 yrs. Old person just wanting a child a baby to love and care for. I want to help it grow and just show my love to the baby. I would do anything to be able to adopt this baby and give it my love, protect and the tlc it needs . My name is christie. Please call me if anyone or if you feel like I'm the one to love and adopt this baby PHONE NUMBER REMOVED

Synnen · Mar 9, 2011, 01:59 PM

Considering this baby is now FIVE YEARS OLD--you're out of luck.

Please watch dates when responding.

ALSO--Do you realize that no birthmother with half a brain is going to call you off a phone number you post on the internet and give you her baby?

If you want to adopt, either get a lawyer and look into private adoption, or go to an adoption agency.