I am trying to find out about my bio parents. I was adopted at birth in Hayward California on Nov 5,1968. I have no information about my birth parents. I now have 3 boys of my own and I really want to be able to give them a heritage. Can anyone help me?

Fr_Chuck

Your heritage is for the fine and wonderful people that adopted you.

They are your "real" parents. I am adopted, my adopted parents were German and Swiss, so that is what I really am, that is my heritage.
My sperm and egg donors ( birth parents) were English and German but that is not who I am, or who I ever will be.

Once you are adopted, those are your real parents and you take thier blood line and heritage, just as Christ took the line of Joseph, even listed in the bible as his line.

doggyluver

im adopted to when i was a child i always asked my parents that adopted me about my bilogical parents. all they knew was that she had me when she was sixteen and my biological dad was gone.

jrussole

Cyn, many counties in CA have open record statutes available. I would check with your state as well as counties adoption laws. Also, I believe that CA has a State Registry that will enable you to receive information pertaining to your adoption. I know that this post came late. But I have yet to see another search angel on this site. Therefore, if you do lurk- just to see if someone could give you any advice what-so-ever, you can start with your state registry. Then I would proceed with ISRR. International Search Reunion Registry. And you can also request your non id information from the adoption agency, if one was used? You may also go to adoption.com, as well as many other sites that may be of assistance. G's list is also a good one, for example. Well, hope this finds you and you get your questions answered.

ScottGem

I agree with Chuck that the heritage you give your boys is the family that raised you. They are your real parents and your boy's grandparents. Your biological parents contributed nothing to your heritage other than their genes.

That being said, there is a medical history issue that is important for your future and your boys. Your first step is the county where you were born. If you were adopted at birth you should be able to find the agency that handled it and get some info.

Your next step would be one of the many sites that help adoptees and birth parents get together when both want it. You can create a listing on such a site or search for your info.

Good luck

jrussole

And once again I have to disagree with the boys! You have two heritages as an adoptee. The one that you were born of and the one that you were adopted into. I value and honor both of mine. Although, never looking Italian I have researched my adoptive family line as far as I was able, to the 1600's.
As as far as my biological family I have researched my heritage to the days of Christ. Researching and requesting your heritage information is a choice.

Someone who is not an adoptee cannot or one that is -may not- value this point of view. But it is a known value shared within the Adoption Triad.

ScottGem

Mea culpa on this. Jrussole is right (for a change ). An adoptee does have two heritages. And both can be very important to them. But the biological one should not take precedence over the adoptive one. I still say the adoptive family is the real one. I also still thing the most important part of the biological heritage is the medical history.

By the way, I also feel that any help offered here should be offered on the public boards.

Fr_Chuck

I will agree and disagree, in your post you said that you wanted this to give your children a heritiage, you are acting like you don't have at least one to give them.

You have a great one to give them, and the story of a chosen child, which is so much more speical than one concieved from a one night stand or one concieved for pure sexual pleasure.

So share what you have. And if you want to find some info, yes often you can find some limited info but in most states these records are sealed for the privacy of those that gavve you away.

Fr_Chuck

Ok all, I have cleaned up any off topic and all of the name calling, heck I even deleted a couple of my posts even though I never named called only gave opinons on certain actions.

So lets keep it civil and keep it on topic

obviously I and maybe Scott disagree as to what is best on finding the adoptee parents. This is our right to discuss this view, others may discuss what they beleive is best,

No more name calling ... period

ScottGem

I think you went a little too far here, Chuck. There was a post where jruss indicated she had found the OP's birth mom. The name calling in that post should have been edited out, but the post itself should have remained. Since its gone, I would suggest that jruss PM the OP to help get them together.

In another post, you said something about adopted children not being permitted direct contact with their biological parent. I wholeheartedly agree. In fact, I think it goes both ways. Any attempt at contact should be handled by a 3rd party and contact information should only be passed when BOTH parties agree to it.

I also think that would be a valid use of the PM feature, since that gets into the realm of personal info.