I amd searching for my birth mother and i only have a little bit of information I was wondering if u could help me contact her

RubyPitbull

shrth, I don't know if anyone on this messageboard actually does physical searches for people. I can suggest a few websites for you to look at and get you started on your search. You can ask for help on these sites. They deal with looking for birth parents all the time. Just doubleclick on them to be taken there.

Adoption Registry Connect

Adoption Search - How to Find Your Birth Parent or Child

Adoption Search: Search for Birth Mother, Adoptee, Birthmother, Child Placed for Adoption, Edna Gladney

Searching for Birthfamily and especially for adoptees who are looking for support for reunion, searching: International adopt...

I hope this helps. Good Luck!

Fr_Chuck

I would also add that make sure you are looking for the right reasons,

If you are adopted these are your parents and make sure that you are not going to hurt them by your searches.

RubyPitbull

Father Chuck has a good point.

Do you think it might hurt your adopted parents? If so, is this something that you think is truly necessary right now? If they won't be hurt by this, is it possible for you to have a discussion them? You might find that they are willing to help you more than you realize. That really would be the best place to start. And, even if they aren't and might be hurt by this, it would be nicer to let them know ahead of time before you find your birth mother.

Think about it, how would you feel if you adopted someone and suddenly the person that gave birth to your child shows up at your doorstep? It can be very hurtful and it shows them that you don't have any trust in them. Do you really want to cause that much upheaval in your life right now?

Fr_Chuck

Again I was guessing at adoptive parents, I do understand many people don't get adopted, and some are raised by one parent and dont' know the other parent,

As a adopted person, I struggled with the demon of desire to do a search for my bio parents and finally did. But afterward I decided that my life is no better for it, and that who I really am was made and decided by the people who raised me.

RubyPitbull

As a adopted person, I struggled with the demon of desire to do a search for my bio parents and finally did. But afterward I decided that my life is no better for it, and that who I really am was made and decided by the people who raised me.

Father Chuck, that is a very insightful piece of information that I hope shrthtv considers if she/he is in the same position.

Fr_Chuck

There are some wonderful reunions between mother/father and child given up, I will not try and say it can not happen. But what you never see on TV are the ones that I often end up couseling. The ones where the people find thier mother and she turned out to be a hooker, or she was raped and had tried to forget the child.
Or their mother is remarried, never told her new husband about it and cause them to divorce or worst.
When they go to find the lost parent, they get cursed, spit on and even have a restraining order put against them.

If they do search and find, they should always use a third party to do the contact and make sure it is done privately and that if the other party does not want to be found, that is respected.

But beyond the good and the bad are the average or normal meeting, it is two strangers, who don't know each other, they have nothing to talk about, and there is no bonding. Image just pick some stranger and sit down and expect some relationship.

Now of course the choice is yours, you can go though some various pay web sites and try some searches, it is always your right to do so, Just don't drop in on the person you find yourself, allow them the right to not see you if they perfer.

corriehac

I am glad you want to know about your past. Even if your real parents of parent dont want to know you at least you tried. and they know your ok. good luck in your search.

Fr_Chuck

?? why are you glad, we do not know why she is looking, she has not responded back, we have no idea what she expects from this search and how it could effect her for the rest of her life on what she finds or don't find.

We can not care if she looks, but everyone should want the person to do so with alot of forethought of what they want to find, and if they are ready for what they find.

corriehac

we must all look into are past, sometimes the past holds a key. Every child longs to know their birth mother , yes the ones who took care of you are your parents , but they are not the ones who gave you life. They do not hold all the answers you seek. Sometimes looking into the past can be painful. But it will make us stronger, for what lies ahead. God gave this child to a mother for what unkown reason she chose to give the greates gift of all life to another who may have not been able to to have such a gift on thier own. I hope that she finds her birth mother, good or bad. thing she will no longer have to wonder.